Saturday, April 30, 2016

Loving The Lord Is A License To Abuse Children

The recent story of Dennis Hasert and Tom Delay's letter to the court have me seriously wanting to puke my guts out.  I'm angry beyond words.  I'm struggling to make sense of this.  I want to lash out at those that abuse children.

I grew up with this mindset that loving the lord gives you a license to abuse children.  My father loved the lord and made sure we were in church every Sunday morning, Sunday night, Wednesday night and any other time something was going on.  Yet, he molested me and beat me and did many horrible things to myself and other members of my family.

Now, I see that my older brother claims to love the lord and yet he did almost as much horrible stuff as my dad did to me.  He molested me almost every day of my life.  He bullied me, beat me.  He did the same to my younger brother.  He caused my mom so much grief and lied like there was no tomorrow.  Yet, he loves the lord and he is some "great christian", repeated once again.

Seeing Tom Delay try to make Dennis Hasert out to be "not such a bad guy" makes my blood boil with anger.  To me, it says if you're going to defend a person who abuses children in this way, then you're just as guilty, Tom Delay.  Maybe someone should be looking into your past.  I don't care about the politics.  I could care less which political seat they held.  Abusing children is about the lowest thing you can do.

How can  you say you love the lord and yet, you destroy one of the most intimate parts of a child?  How can you equate love with abusing children?  Do these child molesters just not understand what it is they do?  Are they that stupid or do they think we are that gullible?

There is no way you can have love in your heart and do these things to children.  There is no way you can say you love the lord while going against what Jesus said when he stated, Do Not Harm Little Children!

While Dennis Hasert only got 15 months in jail, the victims get a life sentence of hell.  They don't get to just stop thinking about being abused as children.  They don't get to stop thinking about all that was done to them.  They don't get to stop dealing with all the triggers and intimacy issues, suicidal thoughts, depression and anxiety.  It stays with them forever.  If they are lucky, they will find some healing from it.

As a society we hold other law breakers up as being worse than a child abuser.  In all reality, a child abuser should get the death penalty.  They are a scourge upon society and the earth.  They are a scum that should be exiled and banished from civilization.  We should be ashamed that we as a society allow the child abusers to get such easy sentences. 

Blog Post And Images (c) 2016 by Don Shetterly
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Friday, April 29, 2016

Focusing On Symptoms

It is a common error we all make.  It is part of the human experience.  I know, because I did it for years.  We get lost in focusing on symptoms, rather than seeing what is right before our eyes.  After all, the easy road is just focusing on symptoms.

You may be thinking, is this writer nuts?  What else would I do but focus on my symptoms?  While this is a good question and will get you thinking in a positive direction, it can be quite confusing.

Symptoms are just outward manifestations of something going on in your physical body.  It is like if you hit your thumb with a hammer, the pain you feel in your thumb isn't the cause.  It is the hammer hitting it that is the cause.

Unfortunately we often look at the pain felt in the thumb as being the sole cause of whatever is happening and we stop looking any further from that point.  Yes, you may need to deal with real issues such as in the case of the hammer, a broken or throbbing thumb.  It all depends of course, upon how hard you hit it.

However, the more important part of healing is not focusing on the symptom, but what happened that caused that to show up.  What was going on in your life?  What experiences had happened before this?

Let's say you wake up and your back is sore or your neck is stiff.  Often we like to say that we "woke up on the wrong side of the bed" or "we slept wrong" or something to that effect.  Unfortunately, there is more to the picture than we see.  Focusing on the symptom may get us to the point of applying heat or ice to ease the discomfort, but if we don't look to the root cause, sooner or later the ice and heat may not help in the way that we need it to help.

In order for this approach to work, you have to be very honest with yourself.  You can't even hide from those things you might not consciously recall in that moment.  You can't hide from the things you have tried to bury all these years if you want this to work.  It won't help to hide from things that you really don't consider to be important or much of a factor.  It is easy to minimize things and that's a human trait we all have. 

Let me give another example in case this isn't clear.  Many years ago I worked with farmers.  At times the animals would get sick.  Immediately some farmers would want to give the animals medication and while that might have been necessary in the moment, you had to stand back and look at the whole picture.

Sometimes we gave medications initially to get the animals feeling better and keep them from dying, but then we took steps to solve why they were getting sick.  If you didn't see the whole picture and just focused on the symptoms (i.e. the animals getting sick), you would end up treating the animals over and over again.  Sometimes some simple change to the cause of the sickness was enough to get completely past what was happening.

When we focus on symptoms, we lose the ability to see the root cause.  Sometimes the root cause is not apparent and there are times when it takes a long time to see the root cause.  However, we must not quit searching for the source or even how to discover the source of the symptoms.  It is the source that matters, not the symptoms.

When I was going through Conversion Disorder, I could have gotten lost in all the symptoms including the seizures, fatigue, and paralysis that I was going through at that point.  Fortunately I had some smart doctors that helped me focus on getting better, not on what was happening to me.  I'm equally as grateful that I didn't get lost in the symptoms and I learned to look forward to understanding the source, not get blinded by the symptoms.

I'm not going to tell you that the source of what you are going through will show up tomorrow or the next day or even the next month.  In my case, it took many months before some of those things began to emerge and even more time to clearly see the entire picture.

I did not get lost in the symptoms.  Instead, I kept trying to understand how to reclaim my life and discover more of myself then I knew was in existence.  I pushed back the paradigms of all that I thought I knew, and quit clinging on to the things that had not gotten me far in life.  After all, if what I was doing had not worked up until this point, then I finally realized that I had to let it go. 

It was in that embrace of all that I did not know, searching for the root cause, that I began to heal and find myself.  If I would have stayed focused on all the symptoms, I would have never made it.  It is a futile exercise that drains you of your energy required to heal.  Yes, I understand it is human nature, but in order to heal, it requires us to step our game up a few notches.

Blog Post And Images (c) 2016 by Don Shetterly
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Thursday, April 28, 2016

5 Minute Mind Body Exercises

So, going back to yesterday's post, we are all too busy to take care of our mind body connection, right?  Wrong!  After all, it doesn't take hours or full days.  You can do so much in just a few minutes.  In fact, if you gave yourself 5 minutes, you could do a lot!

Are you with me?  Can you take 5 minutes out of the 1440 minutes you have in a day?

Here's some things you can do in those 5 minutes that will help your own mind body connection.  No, they aren't a replacement for more involved stuff, but these little 5 minute exercises will at least help.  Once you start to see the difference, then you can move on to the big stuff.

Mind Body Exercises in 5 Minutes

Exercise #1 - Breathing

Where ever you are at, (even if standing in a long line or sitting at your desk), take a few minutes to just focus on your breathing.  You're not trying to breathe a certain way or do deep breathing.  You are just noticing your breath - the rise and fall, the deepness or shallowness and the speed and duration.  You're just observing and being at one with your breath.  You can leave your eyes open and focus on something peaceful or you can quietly shut your eyes.

Exercise #2 - Walking Outdoors

Take a few minutes throughout your day and just walk outside.  Walk out and feel the sun on your face and your body.  Notice the warmth and see how that makes you feel.  How does the sun feel upon your body?  Is it warm?  Is it uncomfortable?  What happens if you find a shady spot and go from the sun to the shade?  How does that make you feel?  Notice what it does to your mood, your emotions, and your stress in that moment.

Exercise #3 -Easy Stretches

Have you ever watched a cat get up from a nap and they do a few little stretches?  It really is that easy.  You don't have to get on the floor and do yoga posses or stretches that you would do before a workout.  I'm talking, light gentle stretches to the ceiling or a gentle twist turning with your back.  Make sure you don't overstep the bounds here and stretch to hard that you injure yourself and by all means, only do some of these things if you're not restricted by your doctor.  It could be a shrug of your shoulders up into tension and then let them drop down.  It could be a stretch of your legs from your office chair.  It could even be an easy walk to the restroom and back or outside for exercise #2.  Whatever the form may be, connect with it and try to feel it.  It isn't a race or marathon.  It isn't a strenuous workout.  It is something that is simple and connected.

Exercise #4 - Being With Your Body

What if you just sat there and thought of how your arm felt if you let it hang down to the floor?  Maybe you could just notice how you felt with your arms folded and then unfolded.  You might stop and think of how your neck and head rest comfortably on your spine as if it were a flag waving in the breeze and balanced steadily on a flag pole.  Find some way to just notice a body part and see how it feels.  See how you could move it to make it feel different.  Sometimes taking a body part into tension and then backing it off in to comfort can dramatically change how we feel.  It is the true mind body connection.

Exercise #5 - The Big Sigh

Have you ever had one of those days when you are just dealing with so much and at some moment, you let out a big sigh. Why not take a deep breath and then as you let it out, you just let the big sigh come out.  Let it come out forcefully in the beginning if you need to, but then do it again where you let it come out as gently as you can.  Most likely you will see how this lets go of so much tension and stuff that you are carrying.  Notice the tension as well as the feel of relaxing because the difference of those two things is where the mind body connection is located.

So...... Pick One!

Pick one of these and try it.  If it doesn't work, pick another.  If that doesn't work, change it up and make it work for you.  We're all different creatures and what works for one person, may not work for someone else.

The important thing that matters is that you choose to do things that will help your mind and body, not claim you have no time.  We all have 1440 minutes in a day and it depends on us what we choose to do with those minutes.  We can use them for our own good or we can waste them and they pay with our lives later.

Get rid of the tension and stress in your body!  Enjoy these exercises.

Feel free to leave a comment and let me know which one worked for you.

Blog Post And Images (c) 2016 by Don Shetterly
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Wednesday, April 27, 2016

Too Busy To Take Care Of Myself

I know, we all have many demands on our time.  I get it.  I understand.  For a long time I was traveling every week and that did not always leave much time to stop and smell the roses.  It did not allow me to take care of myself and do the things that I needed to do.

If I am too busy to take care of myself, at some point my body will stop me in my tracks.  If anyone thinks that they can go forever and ever without something happening, you're just walking on thin ice in the lake and getting lucky.

I am talking from experience after having a Conversion Disorder and being paralyzed, then trying to piece my life back together.  You can find out more about that in my book, Hope And Possibility Through Trauma.

Sure, I went through other stuff in life that contributed to it, but right before the Conversion Disorder hit, I was working 6.5 days a week almost 18 hours a day trying to be the best employee I could be.  I was too busy to take care of myself but I was never too busy to overwork myself.

It came at a price and almost cost me my life.  It was a wake up call.  Even though I know all of this, I still went through a job recently that just about killed me again.  I guess I am too hard headed to learn and so I went back down.  I'm still recovering from that time of being too busy to take care of myself.

You may not get a Conversion Disorder and paralysis.  However, there are things like cancer, heart attacks, back pain, and many other conditions that creep up on us.  If you ignore your body, there is a high probability that at some point, your body will get your attention.

You can pay now by taking care of yourself or you can pay later when things are pretty serious.  It is your choice in all that you do.  We choose to do like I did and work day and night or we choose to enjoy life and take care of our mind and body.  No one else does that for us although we often think they do.

We only have one body and one mind.  If we waste it and exhaust it and overwork it, what good will it be to us in  20, 40, or 60 years?  When we are younger, we think we have all the resources and time we need, but as we get older, all this stuff starts to accumulate and then begin knocking on the door to get our attention.

Let's try not to be too busy to take care of ourselves.  Our body and mind will thank us for it.

Blog Post And Images (c) 2016 by Don Shetterly

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Tuesday, April 26, 2016

Top 10 Social Media Annoyances

Some days I scratch my head at what humans do.  Of all the brain cells that could function and make different choices, it seems that those brain cells must have fallen asleep.  These poor choices create annoyances on the internet.

I have compiled my top 10 online social media annoyances that I have found on both Twitter and Facebook.  In fact, I stopped using Facebook some time ago and it is like a breath of fresh air.  Twitter is almost as bad with these annoyances.

I really wish it was different where people could use social media for a balanced approach of good information, rather than seeing how much they can scam and spam everyone.  I know, there are some good people out there, but the bad ones far outweigh the good.

Top 10 Social Media Annoyances.

#1 Naked Pictures Doing Sex Acts

Don't call me a prude here!  That's not what this is about at all.  Its about having some of the most graphic sexual pictures show up on my news feed.  These aren't small pictures either so when they show up, you can't miss them.  If I am in a public place, it is very inappropriate and it more than crosses the boundaries.  Even if I am not in a public place, I really don't want to see this all day long in my feed.  Most of these people do get reported and blocked, but it makes me wonder why people think that everyone wants to see this.  It usually isn't a once-in-a-blue-moon occurrence either as they plaster the news feed with them all day and all night.  Enough!  If that's all you are adding to civilization, you may want to rethink your role in humanity.

#2 Like My Other Social Media

I gave up on Facebook.  I got tired of so much fakeness on there and too much junk that was posted every minute.  Most of what is shared on Facebook isn't worth two seconds of our time.  Even the marketing people who value your time are the biggest time wasters on Facebook and Twitter.  They really don't offer much value, but they sure waste your time.  I don't do LinkedIn anymore either because I find the site ridiculous and hard to navigate.  When I add someone on Twitter and the only thing that they think is important is for me to add all their other social media sites, I have to wonder about them.  Why would I go to multiple social media sites to follow you.  Do you not think I have anything better to do with my day than that?  Again, I think it is a big time waster.  It is not good online marketing in my view, because when I see it happen, the individual is knocked down in my value list.

#3 Spamming The News Feed

Yes, I understand that you want to reach as many people as you can and not everyone is online at the same time.  However, when I see 5, 10, 20 posts one after another, I tend to completely ignore you and scroll past what it is that you are tweeting.  I'm sure we all have done this in a minor way, but I'm talking about the ones that must have drank 5 tall cups of coffee before coming on Facebook or Twitter.  There is more in a day to do than sit there and see this type of behavior.  If you have that big of an ego, then I'll do like I have always done and either "mute" you or "unfollow" you.  You're abusing the relationship I have with you online and that doesn't sit well in my book.

#4 TrueTwit Verification Nonsense

From what I can tell, using the TrueTwit verification service does very little.  Yet, I see it time and time again.  Maybe the people using this nonsense don't understand what the recipient gets, but let me tell you, it is an annoyance.  It is a nuisance.  I just ignore it now because if I followed you, then I want to read your posts.  I don't wish to jump through hoops to prove to you that I am a valid person.  Sorry, you are asking far too much from me and abusing the trust I have put in you to be on my news feed.

#5 The Fake Link

I get so annoyed by the fake link.  You've probably seen it also.  It is the link that you think will take you to something you might be interested to read.  The link that looks safe, but yet it is not.  It is the links that take you to some site that gets you to sign up for whatever it is that they are pushing.  Most of the time it has nothing to do with what they put in the post, but you don't know that until after you clicked on the link.  It makes me so leery to click on any links these days because I just got hit badly with malware.

#6 Overly Large Pictures

If I am reading my social media accounts on my desktop, the overly large pictures aren't such a problem.  If I am on my smart phone, then it becomes a bigger issue and annoyance.  I now have to scroll down past these.  Most of the time, the ones that post overly large pictures must think that one is not enough and so they post multiple pictures.  The pictures are posted one after another.  The larger the picture, the more difficult it is for me to read the other tweets in between because they almost get swallowed up by them.  Do everyone a favor and find some moderation.

#7 How Many Clicks Does It Take

I think back to the commercials of the lollipop and how many licks does it take to get to the center.  Recently, I had one that when I clicked on the link, it took me to a page without the information.  There was another link to the information that you had to click on.  When I clicked on that, it then took me to another twitter page with the same information as was in the original post.  I still don't know where the information was and I suspect it didn't exist.  It was just meant to get me to click.  What an annoyance!  I believe I rewarded that individual with an "unfollow" and that probably wasn't the result they were hoping for.

#8 Unsolicited Advice

I marvel at this one in real life and its also annoying online.  It happens so much.  The person that comes by and doesn't even read what you posted or an article you linked to or checked out your website, but boy do they have advice for you.  They are quick to tell you what you should do or should not do.  It doesn't matter if it applies or not, they will tell you anyway.  There are far too many noisy people who think they have all the answers.  If that were true, we would have no problems in this entire world!  Let your ego know that not everyone loves your unsolicited advice.  It turns people off and they most likely do like I do, click that unfollow button.

#9 Content Waste

Oh, those auto-generated articles on the internet that are such an annoyance.  If I wanted to read regurgitated content created by a program, I would read source code from a website.  It is such a waste of my time, but people who aren't creative, think that this is good marketing.  I'm sorry, but if you don't have something good to say, just sit in the corner and be quiet until you do.  I have no forgiveness for people who do this, because you are wasting my time and filling the internet up with trash.  Those that do this type of thing obviously do not value the people they are trying to sell to or get as a client.

#10 Pesky Questions And Requests

I am amazed at how many people send automated responses out and ask questions in them.  The thing is, if you respond, they never respond back.  I have gotten to the point where I am ignoring most of these things now which sucks if you're one of the good guys that doesn't do this.  If I just followed you, I'm not going to spend hours reviewing and critiquing your website for you to most likely disregard it anyway.  While you may think it is cute and intriguing to ask me some irrelevant question, I've found that you could care less if I am happy or what happened in my day or what topics I want to see you post about on your news feed.  Again, all these things are time wasters and they are not authentic.  They don't make me want to trust you.  In fact, they make me want to unfollow.

Final Thoughts

We are becoming a spam and scam society and with the internet, it makes our reach much more broad.  However, if you cannot be trusted and people see this in what you post, then you are not adding value to the internet.  You're not adding value to social media.  You are an annoyance.

Marketing is about offering something of value, not trying to get one over on the other person and make them click or cringe.  Marketing is about building relationships and showing the other person that you care enough to not waste their time.  Unfortunately very few online really understand marketing.

Try to offer value and information that others will be better for if they click and read what it is you share.  Make a difference by being authentic, not by being a scammer and spammer.  Its not hard to spot the ones that give little value to everyone who follows or subscribes to them.  Be human by being real.  The internet community will thank you!

Blog Post And Images (c) 2016 by Don Shetterly

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Monday, April 25, 2016

Neuroscience In The News On April 25

These are articles that I found of interest relating to news about Neuroscience.  In this issue, I have highlighted articles about how the brain processes emotions, the natural forgetting of long-term memories and the neuroscience of how to fix creative block.

Please check out the article links below and feel free to comment with other information related to these subjects.  I enjoy learning as much as I can about the brain and passing this information on to everyone else that shares these passions.

This is for the week beginning April 25, 2016.

Please come back each week and hopefully I will have some more highlights.  Feel free to share with me ones that you have found and I may highlight those as well.

Feel free to check out the highlighted articles from April 18, 2016

How The Brain Processes Emotions

Some mental illnesses may stem, in part, from the brain’s inability to correctly assign emotional associations to events. For example, people who are depressed often do not feel happy even when experiencing something that they normally enjoy.

A new study from MIT reveals how two populations of neurons in the brain contribute to this process. The researchers found that these neurons, located in an almond-sized region known as the amygdala, form parallel channels that carry information about pleasant or unpleasant events.

Learning more about how this information is routed and misrouted could shed light on mental illnesses including depression, addiction, anxiety, and posttraumatic stress disorder, said Kay Tye, the Whitehead Career Development Assistant Professor of Brain and Cognitive Sciences and a member of MIT’s Picower Institute for Learning and Memory.

Article Link:

Natural Forgetting Of Long-Term Memories

"Our study looks at the biological processes that happen in the brain when we forget something."

Typically, the process of forgetting is seen as a failure of one or more basic memory functions such as acquisition, encoding, maintenance and retrieval.

However, in this latest study of rats, Dr. Hardt and colleagues suggest that forgetting may involve a well-organized process of active deletion rather than simply failure to remember.

Article Link:

Neuroscience Fix For Creative Block

“When [people] are improvising, there tends to be a pattern of activation where they have decreased activation in a part of the brain called the dorsolateral prefrontal cortex,” Berlin says. “And that part of the brain has to do with your sense of self, your sort of inner critic, making sure that your behavior conforms to social norms.”

Translation? When you’re at your most creative, “basically you lose your sense of self,” Berlin says. “You kind of release your inhibition. The second you become too self-aware that comes back online and you lose that flow state.”

Article Link:

Sunday, April 24, 2016

The Celebration Of Mothers Day

Even in the midst of all the turmoil that I experienced as a kid, this is one day that still means a lot to me.  My mom is no longer living, but I still celebrate her with the website dedicated to her memory.  It is a website in the celebration of Mother's Day through my music, creativity and various other resources.

One of the most precious things I have created is a music CD for Mother's Day.  It is relaxing piano music created from my heart and in honor and memory of my mom.  If you like relaxing music, you will love this CD.  If your mom could use some relaxation, I know she would love this CD.

In addition, Mothers Day Music website is a place with some inspiring ideas and words and pictures.  Maybe you're trying to make a homemade card for your mom and you just need a little more to make it complete, this website is for you.  If you're just trying to fill out a card you bought for your mom or needing to add something to the flowers that you got for her, this website may be able to help you.

Maybe you're wondering what special things you could do for your mom on Mother's Day.  Some of us are very creative and for others, it can be a challenging endeavor.  I have listed many different ideas of things you can do with your Mom on Mother's Day.  Feel free to use them, borrow from them, and by all means, if there is something you feel needs to be added, please let me know.

In addition to all the fun resources, there is some trivia that you can amaze your own mom or wow your friends.  I've included many of the Presidential Proclamations from many years in the past.  These are fun to read and you get a sense of what is written each year, that barely gets any press coverage.

I have also included some history of Mother's Day.  It was not always a day that was celebrated like it is now.  Learning about these things is something I find interesting and I have tried to pull together tidbits of history from many different places.

Most of all, make sure you check out the page that is included in memory of my own mom on Mother's Day.  It is a special page and while the pictures may seem ordinary, they connect me to moments in my life where I cherished my own mom.

Don't forget that Mother's Day is May 8th! 

Blog Post And Images (c) 2016 by Don Shetterly

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Saturday, April 23, 2016

World Happiness Index

I came across a link to a story from one of my twitter followers today and well, it made me happy!  Of course, the country I live in which is the United States didn't rank as high as it could have.  For some reason, we have a lot of angry people in the US and it is more than politics in my view.

Thanks to Wendy (@WendyESlater) for sharing this.

I find it interesting that the places which have more cold weather than we do are ranked higher in the happiness index out of all the places in the world.  I know, weather probably isn't a big determination, but if you put me in the middle of a very cold place, I'm not going to be happy.  I like warm weather much better.

The top places were Denmark, Switzerland, Iceland, Norway and Finland.  They were followed by Canada, Netherlands, New Zealand, Australia and Sweden.  The United States ranked 13 behind Israel and Austria.

Some of the factors including how people ranked their level of happiness were the GDP, life expectancy, generosity, social support, freedom, and corruption.  One would hope our country would excel at many of these things, but we do not.

I think that sometimes in the United States we chase money far too much.  I'm not knocking anyone who makes a lot of money, but sometimes I think that money becomes our sole focus in life.  We easily lose touch with what truly matters and unless there is some crisis we donate to, we aren't the most generous people at times.  You can disagree with me if you want.  That is fine with me!  I just am writing what I observe through my own eyes.  I've seen far too many people hungry and lying on the streets in the cold.

It feels like our political races and politics in general have gotten so divisive that we hardly see each other as human.  We just tend to see each other as opponents and we degrade each other.  This is hardly the making of happiness.  The politics of hate has been building for many years because "hate" gets people to the polls.  Unfortunately those in the US succumb to the hate that is alive and well in these political campaigns.

I really don't think that we spend enough time relaxing and enjoying life.   We are too tied to our smart phones, ipads and computers to take time away.  I'm just as guilty of this as the next person.  Try disconnecting for a day and see how that goes.  We just keep our minds far too actively engaged on tasks that really don't make a difference in our day.

Is there any wonder why we don't rank higher on the happiness index?  I think that each one of us can change this by changing our own life and what we do in a day or how we focus.  It isn't up to some leader or religion or circumstance to make us happy.  It is something that we choose and it comes from within us.

Our actions do speak louder than the words we portray.  Our actions speak louder than what we claim we are for or what we stand against.  It is how we treat others that we show who we are.  The more we are who we are, the more happiness we have in our lives.  It isn't about the other people.  It is about how we treat others that matters most.

Blog Post And Images (c) 2016 by Don Shetterly

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Friday, April 22, 2016

Top Mistakes Made On The Internet

At one time the behavior that we now see online would have been classified as horrible.  It would have been viewed as some website creator that had no clue what they were doing.  Now, our internet experience is made up of all those things that were considered poor website design.  The top mistakes are made by the novice to the experienced, from the small sites to the major sites.

The first top mistake I see is when you click on a link and you get to the page of the article you were hoping to read, but something stands in your way of reading it.  The page starts to load and you start to read it, but then the unexpected happens.  Okay, maybe now it is no longer unexpected.  The ads begin to pop up and take over the screen telling you that in so many seconds you can close them out.  Great, just the reason why I came to your page, so I could read your ads. 

The second top mistake I see is the immediate popup of a survey that you want me to take about your website.  So, before I have had a chance to view anything on your website, you want me to answer questions about your webiste.  Yes, that's the ticket!  That's the sole reason I found your site.  I could care less about your content because all I want to do is take surveys all day long.  This is the entire reason for my existence!  I can guarantee you what kind of answers I would give on your survey if I felt like completing it.

On to top mistake number three where the minute the page loads, the site wants you to sign up for their mailing list.  You might not even know who is behind the site or what they have to offer.  It might just be a link that you ran across.  Lo and behold though, the site owner thinks that you need to get another email in your inbox.  It is as if you don't already get enough spam in your email box the way it is, so let's sign up for some more.  Most email newsletters are not worth two seconds of my time.  Sorry if that offends everyone, but most email newsletters get deleted before I read them.

Top mistake number four is having a web that is so cluttered with so many options and articles and things to click on that you are overwhelmed and lost.  It is almost like website creators are hoping that if they throw enough stuff at the wall, you will click on something.  Unfortunately, it makes the site so confusing and hard to follow that I end up exiting the site.  Website creators have to consider what it is like for a first time visitor and from what I see, very few even think about this.

Top mistake number five is when there is keyword spamming on the page.  You might have found a link on social media or a google search and you go to the website, but nothing on it even resembles what  you were after.  In fact, it is almost hard to find the key search word that you were going for.  It wastes your time and it does not make for a good user experience.  If you think this is how you market and get people to your site to bring in revenue, you may want to look for a different job on the internet because you have completely missed the point.

These are only the top 5 that I can come up with, but by all means, they are not an exhaustive list.  There are far more things that are done every day on websites that should really make the creators and owners ashamed.  At one time, people respected their visitors, but these days it is one online scam and spam session after another.

I believe if you give people some quality content, they will reward you for it in the end.  If you are there just to try and pickpocket the visitors, I think most people will figure it out.  Yes, there might not be a way to measure that, but your visitors will surely see your intentions.

I'm sure that many website creators will not agree and they think their methods are the best.  They think that a mailing list of thousands of people is the way to go or popup ads is what people want.  I know, these things do net "sales" and "sales opportunities", but they really degrade the internet and I think they make you inauthentic at the end of the day.

Blog Post And Images (c) 2016 by Don Shetterly

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Thursday, April 21, 2016

180 Nutrition Is More Than A Protein Powder

I want to tell you about a product that I discovered and just started to try.  It is called 180 Nutrition and the company is out of Australia.  I got a sample pack to try and now I'm waiting for our shipment to arrive so I can try it out every day.

Just so there is no misleading influence here, I am now an affiliate for 180 Nutrition.  They actually contacted me and when I looked at the website, it fits in with what I needed for my life at this time.  You can go to their website and read up on their products, but I'll share with you my experiences.

It looks like they just opened up the US market and started selling some of their products to those who are not in Australia.  Hopefully as the days go, their complete product listing will be available in the US, but for now - its a start.

Normally I don't get into products such as this, but it made sense for me for many reasons.  In addition, I like the fact that they also feel we consume too much sugar.  I will admit, that even though I know this, I still consume far more sugar than I wish I did and I feel like I'm addicted to it.  So, I'm hoping that this program will help me with that.

Here's Why I Said Yes To 180 Nutrition

  • Sugar is something I struggle with and I'm hoping this will help
  • I could stand to lose a little weight
  • I'd rather find a healthier choice for snacks.
  • I like the idea of added protein in my diet. 
  • The product is all natural foodstuffs and that's important.
  • Planning on making my own protein brownies!  Yummy!

As I start taking this every day, I will keep notes and then share that at the end of thirty days to give my observations.  So, please keep checking back for updates.

One of the things I noticed when I used the starter packs is that the chocolate one tasted much better to me than the coconut one.  Maybe if I would have used different fruits, it would have been better.  The chocolate one was delicious and I mixed it with water and a banana.  The one thing I will say is that I wish I would have used ice.  It was way too warm for my liking.

I've got a video I am working on for YouTube of me making the smoothie with this protein pack the first day.  It isn't quite ready, but check back and hopefully, I will have it up soon.

The one thing I did notice is that I wasn't as hungry as I normally am after consuming the starter packs.  I didn't need to snack like I would on a regular day.  If it helps me that much, it will definitely be a home run.

I also like that the guys who run 180 Nutrition are into the mind-body connection and I did see one of their video interviews with Dr. Joe Dispenza who is phenomenal in my view.

Anyway, if you're looking to step up your own nutrition, take a look at 180 Nutrition.  I think you'll be surprised like I was when I checked out their website.

Full Disclosure:  I am an affiliate for 180 Nutrition.  I only promote and endorse products that I completely love and have used.

Blog Post And Images (c) 2016 by Don Shetterly
  • Permission required before any part of this blog post is reprinted, reworded or used in any form. 
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Wednesday, April 20, 2016

Onion Smell Makes Me Sick

At first it was just the taste.  Now, not only does eating onions make me sick, but the smell of them does as well.  I've known that the smell does bother me, but not quite like what I experienced today.

Today, a nice neighbor brought over some food from a church function that got canceled and she didn't want it to go to waste.  While I'm very happy that she did this, I opened it up and the smell of onions about knocked me over.

Within a matter of minutes, I could feel a headache forming and my head hurt.  I could feel my stomach muscles tightening and I was becoming very nauseated.  All of this from the smell of the onions in the food.  I had not tasted or ate the food at this point.

In the past, I know that the smell of onions has brought on an immediate and intense anger within me.  One time I was in a hotel meeting room and they were serving food nearby that had an onion smell.  It didn't take long for me to realize that I needed to exit the room or I might have gone postal.

Another time, I was taking a nap and someone heated up food with onions in the microwave.  The smell of the cooked onions literally woke me up and the next thing I found myself racing down the stairs in a rage.  It took me a couple of minutes to realize that I needed to stop in my tracks and find a different place quickly.

One time, we were walking into a restaurant and the smell of onions almost knocked me off my feet.  I had to immediately get out of there before the rage and anxiety got the best of me.

In fact, just writing about this, I can feel my stomach tense up and begin to hurt.  I can feel a nauseated feeling.  I can feel a little light headed as I write this.  If I got up from my chair right now, I'm not sure I could stand up straight.

A few days ago, I experienced smelling the onions and garlic in the produce section and thinking it was body odor from someone around me.

While I know enough about somatic type triggers, I'm beginning to suspect there is something behind the scenes working on me.  I suspect there is a trigger of some sort with the onion and garlic smell and taste.  It just seems logical.

At this point, I have no idea what is behind this or what is going on.  I've struggled with this for years and as the days go, it intensifies and gets much worse.

While I'd love to solve this one and move past it, I've had too much experience in the past that more horrible stuff will be exposed.  I'm not sure how ready I am to deal with yet another round of stuff in life from my past.

For now, I am just recording this to see how things play out.  It makes absolutely no sense to me at this moment.

You may also want to read what I recently wrote on the possible connection between onions, garlic and body odor.

Blog Post And Images (c) 2016 by Don Shetterly

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Tuesday, April 19, 2016

Dare To Disagree

Many of us want to show how enlightened we are.  We spout off new age rhetoric or feel good phrases.  We show the world just how much we know.  We often claim we are much more than we truly are.

Yet, do we really do as we think we do or are we disillusioned by the cloud of rhetoric we spew online and that which we give to those nearby.  Are we really practicing what we preach and portray or is it a facade that is a persona we give to the world.

Being vulnerable is not easy.  Just ask Brene Brown how vulnerability shows up and just how much it can take you down.  As a result, we hide our vulnerability with our puffed up words and actions.  We portray one thing to the world, while holding our true selves as a secret and hidden entity in our life.

If you want to test this thought, try reading social media postings from the people whom you disagree.  See if you can hold your tongue or your fingers from typing for 2 minutes, not wanting to obliterate the other person's thinking because you are right and they are wrong. See if you can have the same love and compassion for your fellow man that you portray every day to the people that vehemently disagree with you.

See if you can hear their anger and poison filled words and yet be okay knowing that this is their issue, not yours.  I know that is not easy to do.  I struggle with it as well just like most of us do.  The media and various issue groups use this to their advantage as they pit one person against another.  This is how they win.  This is how they hook people into following their news and political revolutions.

I think you do need to be careful that you don't immerse yourself in the rhetoric that seems hateful and full of poison because it can truly drive you insane.  There is far too much of this posted every day on social media and it is not good for society or humans as a whole.  We don't have to pick fights and take sides.  We can rise above this.

Sometimes the best thing that can be done is to just say nothing.  Allow the people to rant and rave all they want but if they don't have an audience, they will soon burn out.  They will be like a candle flame that consumes itself.

The media loves the people who are outside the lines because it emotionally engages those that follow the stories so they will be hooked for days and weeks to come.  It isn't all the media's fault though because the people who consume this stuff are just as much a part of the problem as the media or the ones spewing the rhetoric.

We owe ourselves a lot more in this world and a better experience of what it means to be a conscious individual.  We cannot say we love one another while calling each other all kinds of names and showing our hatred for those who dare to disagree.

We cannot say that we enlightened only if we have others in our lives that agree with us and what we think.  It is a shallow part of the pool and dangerous indeed when we only huddle with those that share the same water.

At the same time, being human requires us to learn how to be conscious and aware.  It requires that we learn what civility and respect is all about in life.  It means that even though we may disagree with others, we need to see the big picture and will this disagreement define our entire existence, or is there more common ground that we share with those that are unlike us.

Blog Post And Images (c) 2016 by Don Shetterly

  • Permission required before any part of this blog post is reprinted, reworded or used in any form. 
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Monday, April 18, 2016

Neuroscience In The News On April 18

These are articles that I found of interest relating to news about Neuroscience.  In this issue, I have highlighted articles about the antimatter and the discovery of antimemory, the discovery of a potential new source for pain inhibition, and nerve terminals and nerve signaling.

Please check out the article links below and feel free to comment with other information related to these subjects.  I enjoy learning as much as I can about the brain and passing this information on to everyone else that shares these passions.

This is for the week beginning April 18, 2016.

Please come back each week and hopefully I will have some more highlights.  Feel free to share with me ones that you have found and I may highlight those as well.

Feel free to check out the highlighted articles from April 11, 2016

Antimatter and Discovery of Antimemory

In trying to understand the effects of imbalance, scientists reached the conclusion that there must be a second process in learning that acts to rebalance the excitation caused by the new memory and keep the whole system in check. The theory is that, just as we have matter and antimatter, so there must be an antimemory for every memory. This precise mirroring of the excitation of the new memory with its inhibitory antimemory prevents a runaway storm of brain activity, ensuring that the system stays in balance. While the memory is still present, the activity it caused has been subdued. In this way, antimemories work to silence the original memory without erasing it.

Article Link:

Potential New Source For Pain Inhibition

According to Dr. Ted Price, associate professor in the School of Behavioral and Brain Sciences, the discovery of neuroligin-2 as a cause exacerbating chronic pain is significant for the research community.

Normally, a GABA neurotransmitter acts to inhibit neuronal activity, such as pain. However, when pain becomes chronic there is strong evidence that a process called GABAergic plasticity can cause GABA to lose its inhibitory activity, sometimes making the pain even worse.

“When you hit your hand with a hammer, almost everybody has the same reflex reaction — that is, to rub your finger which, in turn, helps to reduce pain. The reason that works is because it increases GABAergic inhibition in the spinal cord,” Price said. “However, people who have chronic pain — if they do the same thing — find that rubbing it actually makes the pain worse. That’s because the GABAergic system loses its efficacy and, in fact, can become excitatory.”

Article Link:

Nerve Terminals and Brain Signalling

This spectacular image – which took the best part of a year to create – shows the fine structure of a nerve terminal at high resolution, revealing, for the very first time, an intricate network of fine filaments that controls the movements of synaptic vesicles.

The brain is soft and wet, with the consistency of a lump of jelly. Yet, it is the most complex and highly organized structure that we know of, containing hundreds of billions of neurons and glial cells, and something on the order of one quadrillion synaptic connections, all of which are arranged in a very specific manner.

This high degree of specificity extends down to the deepest levels of brain organization. Just beneath the membrane at the nerve terminal, synaptic vesicles store neurotransmitter molecules, and await the arrival of a nervous impulse.

Article Link:

Sunday, April 17, 2016

Mothers Day Is May 8

It's that time of year!  

Mother's Day is May 8.


Looking For A Gift For Mom?

Check out Mother's Day

Music, Resources, Trivia, Things To Do

Even if you are a procrastinator,  Mom is too special to forget on Mother's Day.  The website, Mother's Day has many resources for you to help you make this day a special one.

Make sure you check out my Relaxing Spa Music CD that was made especially for Mother's Day.  I'm sure your mom would love it as she relaxes to the piano music.  The CD can be downloaded on Amazon or iTunes or Spotify.

There are many ideas and wonderful resources on the website to help you.  I no longer have my mom around to celebrate with, and that is why I made this page.  It is a special one to me.

What are you waiting on - that's right, check out Mothers Day Music and spread the word!

Saturday, April 16, 2016

Body Odor Related To Onions And Garlic

I was in the store last night and might have made a connection to something I struggle with very hard.  Now, I'm not saying this applies to everyone, but it was a "light bulb" moment in my mind and I can't even declare what I'm writing here is actually what is going on.  I'm just recording the observation.

Onion and garlic make me sick.  There is no doubt about it.  It doesn't take much and I'm heading for the bathroom vomiting my guts out.  Then for the next two days, I feel like someone continuously sucker punched me in the stomach and gut for days.  Along with it, I normally get such a massive headache that I just want to crawl in a hole and die.

Onion and garlic are in everything we eat these days.  Manufacturers and restaurants and cooks think that onion and garlic need to be put in everything.  Yes, I understand they are healthy substances, but if you're allergic to them, then they aren't healthy.  I've gotten where I can tolerate a few little pieces of onion without too great of a reaction, but if the food is heavily laced with onion or garlic, it becomes a nightmare for me.

Its important to note that just the smell of these things can cause almost the same reaction in me.  In fact, if someone is cooking onions and the smell gets very intense, I find myself in a rage wanting to beat the daylights out of someone.  I have been woken up from a nap by the smell of onions and remember coming down the stairs in a rage before I understood what was happening.

So, back to the main story for this post.  I was walking through the store and trying to pick out a few tomatoes for dinner.  I'm not paying attention to what is around me and all I'm really focused on is the tomatoes.  I begin to smell what I thought was bad body odor around me.

Thinking that someone is close to me with bad body odor, I become disgusted that anyone could not take care of themselves.  I become upset that I would have to endure this.  I tried to put it out of my mind, but it is a constant smell I'm facing.  As I begin to look around me, I notice that no one is close by.  I know I'm clean and it isn't coming from me either.

It is then, that I look up and notice what is right next to me.  There are the onions and garlic right by the tomatoes.  It becomes clear that I am not smelling body odor.  In fact, I am smelling the onions and garlic right next to me.  I could immediately begin to feel my stomach tighten and hurt as if I was going to vomit.

I'm not 100% sure if I can say that the body odor smell is related to my allergic reaction to onions and garlic.  However, I know this is the not the first time that this smell has bothered me and I suspect there is some relation between the things.  In fact, I can almost smell the two child molesters as they forced me to do things I did not want to do.

I realize that I am very sensitive and I sense and pick up things that most people don't.  However, I'm beginning to question and wonder if my disgust with onions and garlic is more of an emotional flashback to childhood trauma.

Its logical in my mind that it could be related, but damn it, I'm so tired of dealing with flashbacks. I've fought this one for a long time.  Years ago, I loved onion and garlic and in fact, I still love the taste.  I just know that if I eat them, the allergic reaction will take place and that's no fun!  I have to be so careful in what I eat and its getting harder and harder to find stuff without onion and garlic in it.

How you disconnect from all these memories is still a mystery.  I've done quite well with most of the trauma memories and issues, but this one is a big one for me.  It reminds me of when I was frightened of the color purple for years, until the whole memory came into view and then it made sense.

Our minds are pretty good at hiding things from us because some of our experiences are so horrible, that our minds cannot find a way to process what is taking place.  This onion and garlic thing could very likely be one of those situations.  I'm at the point that I wish whatever it was that happened would just come into full view and I could care less at this point how much it takes me under.  I'd just like to be free of this ordeal with onions and garlic.

Blog Post And Images (c) 2016 by Don Shetterly

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Friday, April 15, 2016

Surviving My Past

Let me introduce you to someone I find interesting and inspiring.  While I know there are a lot of places across internet land for survivors, not all of them touch me in the way this site did.  I've only had a chance to read a few of the blog posts on this site at the time I am writing this, but just wanted to give a shout out to Surviving My Past.

The other day on twitter, I saw a tweet come through that was talking about the book by Ellen Bass, The Courage To Heal.  This is an awesome book in my view and I believe it was the first book I ever bought when I was starting to piece my life together.

I remember listening to Ellen Bass speak at the Voices conference in Chicago in the late 1990's.  I don't recall exactly what year it was, but it was my first time being among other survivors of child abuse.  We sang the song together in that lecture, "How Could Anyone" by Shaina Noll.  If you want a life changing song, check out the song I just mentioned.  Try and sing along with it like I did in the morning and at night.  It brought tears to my eyes and helped transform how I viewed myself.

Back to the story of how I connected with Surviving My Past.  I saw the tweet come through and had to comment.  Of course, the individual commented back and then we had a conversation.  It was one of those connections that you just feel like you know what the other person has gone through because you both have been fighting in the same war.  And I found out that this was a male survivor of child abuse who had come across this book like I did.

I checked out his website and was blown away by how much he talked about his own journey of healing as he is going through it.  Surviving child abuse is not easy and if you make it through this part, trying to heal your life is equally as difficult.

When it comes to male survivors, there is this hidden code in the world that guys just don't talk about being sexually abused and they sure don't share emotions.  After all, little boys are taught from an early age in the family and society that they are just supposed to buck up and take it.  You're not supposed to show any signs of weakness as society and the family would dictate.

I like the raw and unedited part of his life that he is showing in .   Its the real deal.  It is the person that is trying to piece their life back together with all the challenges you face and the energy it takes.  It is the questioning and attempt to search for answers, not just wallowing in the horrors.

I'm so inspired by this site and I hope you will take time to check it out.  Please pass it on to your friends that may need it, especially your male survivor friends.  There are many male survivors out there that need help and they need to know they aren't alone.  After all, I witnessed that in the Oprah 200 Male Survivor episode back in 2010.

The website is Surviving My Past (

You can also connect with him on Twitter @SurvivingMyPast

Blog Post And Images (c) 2016 by Don Shetterly

  • Permission required before any part of this blog post is reprinted, reworded or used in any form. 
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Thursday, April 14, 2016

Creating Your Life And Self Sabotage

I recently found this video and loved it, so I wanted to share it with all of you.  Ever since the movie documentary, "What The Bleep" has aired, I have always liked and enjoyed what Dr. Joe Dispenza has said.

A company from Australia that I am now an affiliate called 180Nutrition interviewed Dr. Joe Dispenza and it was an excellent video.  I took  notes of the video and have tried to summarize them below to help you follow along with the video.

I did not realize that Dr. Joe Dispenza went through a horrible accident in a triathlon and to heal his paralysis from his broken vertebrae, he found a way to heal himself without medications and surgery.  Yes, the surgeons thought he had PTSD when he opted not to have surgery, but in the end, he conquered what life had thrown his way.

Take a look at 180nutrition, because these guys have similar views to healing and taking care of the body that I write about on this blog.  It is what attracted me to them and today I just tried their product for the first time.  It was delicious!  Here's the link for 180nutrition.

Notes From The Video


Dr. Joe Dispenza with 180Nutrition Guys


Break the Habit of Being Yourself & Create the Life You Truly Want

Video Link (YouTube)

Author Of:  

  1.  In 1986, he was injured by a vehicle during a triathlon and broke six vertebrae in his back.  Surgeons wanted him to have a procedure called the Harrington Rod surgery.  
    • Dr. Dispenza said if it was a patient of his, he would have advised them to have the procedure.
    • He opted not to go the surgery and the surgeon thought he had PTSD because no one ever opted out of this surgery for the condition he was in.
    • He did not want to be paralyzed and in a wheel chair taking medications for the rest of his life.
    • He decided to take the journey between the connection of the mind and body, realizing that some intelligence giving us life, if he could connect with it and surrender to it, then he felt he could heal himself.
    • He went through hell and realized that this was much more difficult than he realized and much harder than simply stating this concept.
    • Six weeks later he began to see changes.
    • Ten weeks later he walked back into life and was doing races at 12 weeks.
  2.  Meditation was a big part of how Dr. Dispenza healed himself
    • Consciousness is awareness and awareness is paying attention.
    • He reasoned that when he closed his eyes, he could eliminate the external environment, forget about the paralysis and the pain in his body.
    • He did this for three hours every day.
    • His mind would start to wander and then he would start the meditation process over.
    • He stated that it took him a long time to anchor into his brain.
  3. Why Do People Self Sabotage?
    • The hardest part about change is not making the same choices you did the day before.
    • The moment you decide to do something different, get ready because you're going to feel uncomfortable.
      • To no longer think the same way
      • To no longer make the same choice
      • To no longer behave the same way
      • To no longer have the same experience
      • To no longer live by the same emotion
    • You're going to feel unfamiliar.
    • You are stepping into the river of change and the minute things don't feel good, that is when someone wants to return to their same chemical state.
    • Going from the old self to the new self is crossing that river of change.
    • It is the biological, neurological, chemical, hormonal, genetic death of the old self.
    • Most people want to create a new life but they cling to the familiar self and emotions.  The moment they stop feeling the same way they always have, they feel uncomfortable.
    • The body starts to send signals back to the brain that says start tomorrow, this doesn't feel right or you'll never change.  The person listens to that voice or thought as if it were true.
    • The thought leads to the same choice which leads to the same behavior and the same experience and to the same feeling.  It feels right.  It is what they know.  It is what feels familiar.
    • People don't believe they can go from one place to the other because when they are in that void, you can't predict the future.  The moment someone can't predict the future, they go back to what they know.  
    • The best way to create your future is in the unknown, not in the known.
    • Self Sabotage is what feels familiar.
  4. When creating a vision of your future, are there muscles to train to keep yourself on track or faith that the outcome will be there?
    • You're either defined by a vision of the future or defined by a memory of the past.
    • The brain creates images and pictures which forms intention.  
    • When we get clear on intention and the vision, it creates an emotion.
    • You become inspired, excited, enthusiastic.
    • The body lives in the future, not in the past.
    • Like a garden, you have to keep feeding it and giving it life.
    • If we use feelings as a barometer for change, we will talk ourselves out of possibility.
    • The moment we don't feel like doing it, we turn back to our old self.
    • The person that arrives at their goal and vision is because their vision is their compass.
      • They will make choices consistent with their vision.
      • They will get clear on the choices they are going to make.
      • They will get clear on the experiences and behaviors they need to stay away from and the emotions that bring them to a lower denomination.
    • People get too distracted with meaningless things that takes them to emotions that keep them from the vision.
  5.  Placebo Effect
    • Story of a study with cancer patients.  30% of the ones on the placebo chemotherapy treatment lost their hair).
    • More than 40% on their way to chemotherapy that are told they are going to get nauseous, get nauseous on the drive there in anticipation of the treatment.
    • Can we think ourselves healthy?
      • If people are given a sugar pill, saline injection, false surgery or procedure, a certain percentage of those people will accept, believe, surrender to the though that they are getting the real substance or procedure.  
      • They will begin to program their autonomic nervous system to make the exact pharmacy of chemicals that they think they are taking.
    • Is it the inert substance or the body's innate ability doing the healing?
    • In a depression study, 81% of the people given the placebo got better because they are making their own pharmacy of antidepressants in their body.
    • More than 50% of people in pain studies given saline are having no pain because they are making their own morphine by thought alone.
    • A pill in the quantum field represents getting healthy.  The moment you combine a pill with the possibility of an emotion such as hope, the combination of clear intention and elevated emotion takes the person from living in the past to living in their future.
    • It is a scientific fact that the hormones of stress push the genetic buttons that create disease.  70% of our culture lives in stress the majority of their time.  
    • You can think about something in the past or worry about the future and turn on the stress response just by thought alone.
    • If you thoughts can make you sick, is it possible that your thoughts can make you well?


There is a good chance, I've missed some other great material in this video.  I just tried to take down notes for myself and share them with everyone.  You can use the notes as you listen to the video and you will probably get much more from it. 

In my own life, I have found to be true, what he says.  I too, was paralyzed but from a Conversion Disorder.  At one time I was told I would most likely never function fully in life and I would always be on medication.  The doctors were not sure if I would ever walk and hold down a job.  I was bound and determined to prove them wrong and I did.  I take no medication and anyone around me would never know I was once paralyzed and almost no longer alive.

There is so much we can do and hopefully you will listen to this video.  This is not new age mumble jumble.  It is stuff that many of us have already discovered and understand.

Thank you to Dr. Joe Dispenza for the video you did with the 180nutrition guys.  I hope to get the chance to attend one of your events because your concepts have helped me in my life.

Wednesday, April 13, 2016

Anger As A Child Abuse Survivor

I feel very vulnerable when I write and share this.  After all, aren't I supposed to be healed because I'm a healer?  Aren't I supposed to be able to move past my anger if I'm a healer?  Unfortunately, anger from being a child abuse survivor is operating at peak performance.

I'm admitting it.  I have an anger problem, damn it!  I try to hide it.  I try not to show it.  Heck, for years I just stuffed it deep down inside.  It was much easier for me that way.

Anger was always taught to me from an explosive father that would yell, scream, abuse anyone close to him including my mom.  If there was anything near by he could pick up, he would use it to knock some sense into us.  I've been hit with boards, shovels, garden hoes and probably far more things than I can even remember.

It was the way I was taught about anger.  I was scared of anger and even beginning to show it.  As I went through therapy and healing, I started to be brave and let it out.  Unfortunately the flood gates opened and broke and now it seems like my angry outbursts show up all too often.

I'm trying.  I'm trying to get it under control and make sure it doesn't consume those around me.  Some days I do pretty well and other days I kind of suck at it.

I still struggle to find an effective way that helps me release it.  It feels like a pressure cooker inside of me that is going to go off no matter what I do.  Thinking happy thoughts, meditation, breathing - most of it doesn't work.

While I hate admitting it, I really want to unleash the anger on those that hurt me and despise me as a result.  I want to make them hurt as much as they made me hurt and I want them to feel the pain I still feel in my mind, my body and my daily life.

Why should they get a reprieve from it?  I hope they suffer for what they did to me.  I have no love for them and yet, I'm told time and time again that I need to forgive them.  Right - not easy!  I'm not sure if I want to forgive them because it feels like I'm letting them off the hook.  No way, no how do I want to do that.

At times I'm lost with this anger.  It took me years to get in touch with it and now I wish it wasn't there.  I'd like to think I could just hide it and say "serenity now" or some other foolish thing, but you know what - I could go and hold my head under water and expect to breathe as well.

I'm not one to do quick things of sugar coating something to make it appear as if it is over.  I either go full force and head into it completely, or I live with it until I'm ready to do this.  Yes, I'm hard headed but that trait got me walking again and functioning after dealing with Conversion Disorder.

There is so much anger in the world today and I can feel it.  It makes me angry and I can barely take that.  I wish I had a magic pill that truly worked.  I wish that I could just say it is so and it would help.  Unfortunately, I still haven't graduated from anger 101 in the school of life.

Each day though, I keep trying and each day, I hope it gets a little better.  Its what I have to hold on to in this moment.  It is hope!

Blog Post And Images (c) 2016 by Don Shetterly

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Blog Post And Images (c) 1/01/07 by Don Shetterly
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