Onion and garlic make me sick. There is no doubt about it. It doesn't take much and I'm heading for the bathroom vomiting my guts out. Then for the next two days, I feel like someone continuously sucker punched me in the stomach and gut for days. Along with it, I normally get such a massive headache that I just want to crawl in a hole and die.
Onion and garlic are in everything we eat these days. Manufacturers and restaurants and cooks think that onion and garlic need to be put in everything. Yes, I understand they are healthy substances, but if you're allergic to them, then they aren't healthy. I've gotten where I can tolerate a few little pieces of onion without too great of a reaction, but if the food is heavily laced with onion or garlic, it becomes a nightmare for me.
Its important to note that just the smell of these things can cause almost the same reaction in me. In fact, if someone is cooking onions and the smell gets very intense, I find myself in a rage wanting to beat the daylights out of someone. I have been woken up from a nap by the smell of onions and remember coming down the stairs in a rage before I understood what was happening.
So, back to the main story for this post. I was walking through the store and trying to pick out a few tomatoes for dinner. I'm not paying attention to what is around me and all I'm really focused on is the tomatoes. I begin to smell what I thought was bad body odor around me.
Thinking that someone is close to me with bad body odor, I become disgusted that anyone could not take care of themselves. I become upset that I would have to endure this. I tried to put it out of my mind, but it is a constant smell I'm facing. As I begin to look around me, I notice that no one is close by. I know I'm clean and it isn't coming from me either.
It is then, that I look up and notice what is right next to me. There are the onions and garlic right by the tomatoes. It becomes clear that I am not smelling body odor. In fact, I am smelling the onions and garlic right next to me. I could immediately begin to feel my stomach tighten and hurt as if I was going to vomit.
I'm not 100% sure if I can say that the body odor smell is related to my allergic reaction to onions and garlic. However, I know this is the not the first time that this smell has bothered me and I suspect there is some relation between the things. In fact, I can almost smell the two child molesters as they forced me to do things I did not want to do.
I realize that I am very sensitive and I sense and pick up things that most people don't. However, I'm beginning to question and wonder if my disgust with onions and garlic is more of an emotional flashback to childhood trauma.
Its logical in my mind that it could be related, but damn it, I'm so tired of dealing with flashbacks. I've fought this one for a long time. Years ago, I loved onion and garlic and in fact, I still love the taste. I just know that if I eat them, the allergic reaction will take place and that's no fun! I have to be so careful in what I eat and its getting harder and harder to find stuff without onion and garlic in it.
How you disconnect from all these memories is still a mystery. I've done quite well with most of the trauma memories and issues, but this one is a big one for me. It reminds me of when I was frightened of the color purple for years, until the whole memory came into view and then it made sense.
Our minds are pretty good at hiding things from us because some of our experiences are so horrible, that our minds cannot find a way to process what is taking place. This onion and garlic thing could very likely be one of those situations. I'm at the point that I wish whatever it was that happened would just come into full view and I could care less at this point how much it takes me under. I'd just like to be free of this ordeal with onions and garlic.
Blog Post And Images (c) 2016 by Don Shetterly
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