Wednesday, January 2, 2013

My Way Or The Highway Says Ego

Recently I saw this statement on Facebook that brought me to write a blog post about it.  Don't worry, out of respect for the individual, the name is being withheld.  If they wish to disclose it, they are more than welcome to do this.

The reason I am using it in this blog post is because it needs to be a teaching tool.  Right now in our world, we encounter this my way or the highway type of attitude that comes from none other than the ego. I am not sharing it to make light of an individual or embarrass them in any way.  It is an observation that is reflected throughout our world and should be seen in this way.

Without further delay, here is the quote.  Please excuse the language in it, but I'm copying it in here just as it was stated. 

If you disagree with me, save us both time and shut the hell up.... not interested in your opinion! Facts are facts!

While many will read this statement and see just how shocking it is, there is a bigger reason why I am sharing it.  First off, a statement like this come directly from the ego.  The ego is the one that says "I'm right, you're wrong" or its my way or the highway.  The ego has to be in control.  It has to be right and it has to have the power.  The ego focuses on separation and a "us against them" attitude and mentality.  This is what disturbs me the most by this comment.

On the other hand, statements coming from the heart and from our consciousness do not make ultimatums.  These type of statements do not act as if they are the final word in something.  They see people through the eyes of love with acceptance and understanding.  The heart and our consciousness sees the bigger picture and contemplates how we can work together as a human civilization, rather than as opposing forces.

For me, this statement hits so close to home, literally and figuratively.  You see, when growing up I would often hear my father say "either you live by my rules or don't let the door hit you in the backside on the way out".  He was very much a strong force for the concept of "my way or the highway" type of thinking.  He never mixed words either on this and so if you disagreed with him, you either needed to keep it to yourself or you might as well have packed your bags and left.  I'm not over-exaggerating here either.  If you grew up in my house, you would see how often we heard these things.

It took me a long time to understand that I didn't have all the answers.  In fact, my own insecurities most likely were shining through the words I was saying, because my ego was trying to make up for its own deficiencies. I had to learn that what I had been taught, was not something I needed to continue to carry on in my life.

In addition to how my father would behave, we attended churches that would claim you were going to hell if you didn't listen to the minister and your father, who of course had all the answers.  You talk about compounding a set of beliefs and statements coming from ego, there is no better example to observe.  These things were drilled into me from an early age.

After years of healing and intense work learning to let go of the ego, I have begun to see just how damaging statements and beliefs like this can be.  However, I realize that each person is traveling on their own path, and hopefully a new and more aware consciousness will prevail at some point.  It isn't up to me to convince someone like this that they may not be right.  My only role if I have one in this, may be to help them see that statements like "my way or the highway" are created by the ego.

More importantly though, the more we sit down and become one with the ego, the less likely we are to evolve as a human to a greater consciousness.  The more we sit down and connect with our deepest parts of our mind body interface, the more our heart will prevail and the ego will stay in check.

Blog Post And Images (c) 11/30/12 by Don Shetterly

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