Sunday, June 19, 2011

Surviving Father's Day

To all the great, loving and wonderful fathers out there, I admire and am warmed by your presence in this world. There, I said that. I actually got that sentence out! It's a first in a very long time that I could write or say these words! Most of the time, what I would say on Father's Day, you really don't want to know! It wouldn't be appropriate for all ages.

For me, Father's Day is anything but wonderful. Except for my two cats, I'm not a father and I don't ever plan on being one. I really don't consider my cats my children anyway as I see them as equals, not subordinates.

For those that have read my book, "Hope And Possibility Through Trauma", you will already know that my father was more of a sperm donor than a father. He of course would differ with that opinion and feels he did nothing to harm me. I, on the other hand know the truth.

It is a difficult day for me and I know it is a difficult day for many others. I wish I could say differently but I can't if I am honest with myself and with life. I wish I could say that I still talked to my father and that we had a good relationship but the last time I spoke with him was around 1998. He's too toxic for me and there is no good purpose served for me to attempt to contact him. He made his own bed (no pun intended) and I have had to move on with my life.

While it is difficult for me to survive Father's Day, I am trying to be supportive and positive to those that have a father they love or miss or that may be a father to some wonderful children. If you fall into these categories, let me know that you are out there. You might help change my perception of what a father is, because in my case, the only one I knew, fell short.

Blog Post & Images (c) 6/18/11 Don Shetterly - use by permission only

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1 comment:

  1. Yes, I do understand. But, you know Our earth fathers are just our temporary custodians here on earth. Some are great, some are not, some are loving and some are not, but all are doing what they know..we can't get blood out of stone. But, strangely what I know from the spirit world is that we choose our fathers/mothers as we come to this earth, and how they are choses is according to the lessons we want to learn. For ex. My father was a great person, worked hard, financially supported me, but I never heard him say "I love you"..I mean the words..his love came from his hard work,pay for my college..etc..but, losing mother at age 5..I grew up needy of love..which in return made me look at all the wrong places, but, I did not realize that very thirst for love was truly to make me realize my own self, an intuitive woman who can also communicate with spirits ( still developing ,meaning not doubting my own self).At age 11 I started raising my own self, so I had to be independent and learn to survive. Today, I am a wonderful mom, wife, person..having experienced so much made me who I am. If I did not lose my mother at age 5, I would never have come to america and be so independent and teach the same to my two wonderful, the wheel my go round and round but the supports change in front of our eyes. Through Opposites, we learn what we want, who we are...For those wonderful man who are responsible, everyday is a Fathers Day, there is nothing special about today it is just another day, but to a loving dad everyday is of love.. Enjoy this beautiful glorious day for who you are and the blessings you have...






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