Tuesday, January 20, 2015

Protect Your Boundaries

Many years ago, I struggled so much with this concept.  I didn't even think boundaries were something I remotely understood.  When they get violated repeatedly and violently early on in life, learning to protect your boundaries is essential for growth.

I can see more and more just how some of those lessons were preparing me for my current life and that is to come in the future.  Without some of what I have learned, I'd be crumbling for sure now.

Boundaries are essential to life.  It doesn't mean you keep everyone out or you let everyone in.  You learn to discern which people at which times of your life can cross through into the inner circle of your life.  Some people are fine most of the time, but there are times when you need to pull back.

Boundaries are essential in learning what concepts and teachings and thoughts enter your inner circle.  After all, there is so much going on out there in a day that if you let it all in, you will quickly be a mess.  If you keep it all out, you will be an island.  Not every thought, teaching, or concept is vital to your life, and it should not necessarily be welcomed because it is such.  Discerning which things come in and which things don't, is protecting your boundaries.

Boundaries are essential in relationships, especially very intimate ones.  Without boundaries in relationships, you may feel taken advantage of,  over used, and abused.  You may miss out on the ultimate true joy of the relationship because a boundary is missing.  Learning to hold boundaries with other people not only protects your boundaries, but it helps strengthen the connection you share with the other person.

Boundaries grow and change depending upon the time period of your life and what you are encountering.  They shift and morph from one moment to the next. Its all part of the living moments in life where you experience each new moment as it comes.

Sometimes it may be necessary to lock people out of your life by widening those boundaries as large as you can make them.  There are people that sometimes hurt us intentionally or unintentionally and until we can fully evaluate the situation, sometimes we just need to pull back and protect our boundaries.  It doesn't mean you need to keep them locked out forever, but maybe until you are strong enough to deal with the situation.

In this day and age with social media and text messages and always being available, we are losing some of our own boundaries.  The invasion of modern day electronic devices into our life can sometimes be a thief in the night when it comes to boundaries for our life.

Honor and respect yourself and the moments you are in.  You don't need to live life all at once.  You can experience different parts and moments as you go through your day and that is okay.  The more you protect your boundaries, the more you can be there for others and with others to experience a much more full and beautiful life.

Blog Post And Images (c) 1/10/15 by Don Shetterly

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