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Preaching hate

I'm sorry if this makes some uncomfortable, but its the only way I can deal with the tragedy in Orlando.  I've had people stop following me on Twitter today because I talked about hate. I guess they don't like the fact that I'm gay.  I'm not going to apologize for this.  I am who I am and if anyone cannot accept me, it was nice meeting you.

I'm not sure how you can say the following statement and immediately watch scores of people unfollow.  I could think of all kinds of words to say about that action, but I won't step down into the depths of hatred and return the favor.  Take a look at what I said and see if that is a bad thing.  In my mind, it isn't.  Who knows, maybe people who hate are somehow more intelligent.  Maybe that's it.  I don't know.

You can't preach hate every day and expect a different outcome. Hate only breeds hate.

— Don Shetterly (@mindbodythought) June 12, 2016

Its sad.  We have hate that is fueled by the preaching of hatred across this land.  Whether it is in the church pulpit or the political arena, it seems we just like to hate.  We teach hatred as if it was a key in life.  All the time, we don't even know that we are so hateful to others.  Too many puff their chests up and act like somehow they are better and more superior.

In fact, most people that show their hatred are the ones that cry about how much of a victim they are.  They claim that if they can't spew and forth their hatred on to others at every turn in life, that somehow they are being victimized and silenced.  They don't stop to see just how their words, thoughts, and actions are some of the most hateful things that they produce.

Some out there think that if you don't believe in the way their religious teachings command, that you are stopping them from exercising their freedoms.  Nothing could be further from the truth, but to those that hate, truth is the last thing that fills the voids in their mind.

Not everyone believes the way you do.  It is called freedom of religion and freedom of speech.  However, when you push your beliefs upon everyone else, you've made the entire world less human.  You haven't helped the least among you and you sure don't exemplify the words of the Bible that you so vehemently claim you practice.  I'm often surprised at how these individual do not know what is in the Bible that they spout at every turn.

The more we spew the hatred and divisiveness to one another, the more we set people in our world to see that it is okay to hate others.  Even if we are not smart enough to know we are spewing hatred, it does not excuse our words, thoughts, and actions.  The more hate is preached, the more you cannot expect a different outcome.

See, we're more worried about what others do in this country and world than we are about what we do.  We are more worried about how others don't measure up in our judging eyes, than we are learning to accept others and celebrate our differences.

Preaching hate is the norm of our day.  It is sad that it happens with such frequency.  I'm saddened by what I see on social media, by the politicians and the churches, and those that spew the hatred.  The more this happens, the more violence we will continue to see.

(click image to read)
 

Its horrible.  I sat here today, crying tears of sadness and pain for those that lost loved ones in this senseless and horrible shooting in Orlando.  Of course, everyone reaches for the political one-liners to spew even more hate.

When will we learn?  When will we understand that it isn't everyone out in the world that is the problem, but ourselves and our heart?  When will we learn that it is our thoughts, actions, and words that we portray to the world which can either build us up or tear us down.  If you're doing these things, you are just as much a part of the problem as those that are blinded by the hatred in their hearts.

I'm sorry if this blog post sound harsh, but it is how I see things.  I'm tired of being silent as to not offend anyone.

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Blog Post And Images (c) 2016 by Don Shetterly

• Permission required before any part of this blog post is reprinted, reworded or used in any form. 
• You are welcomed to share the LINK to this blog post.  

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Finding Freedom In Difficult Circumstances

Finding Freedom In
Difficult Circumstances

It saddens me every time I see someone going through very difficult moments of their life.  I've been through those same moments and I know how others feel.  I know the despair, the frustration, and the anger at life when things just seem to go nowhere.  I know how difficult it is to keep going even in the midst of courage, optimism, and determination.

The only thing I take comfort in is knowing that I have learned so much through these times.  At the moment I was in these difficult circumstances, it was almost impossible for me to see that.  Through each difficult moment, I have grown and evolved into a better person than I was before.  In all reality, that is what these moments are here for.  They are here to teach us and help push us through the lessons of life that we need to learn and understand.  Without these moments, would we really move forward?

I see too many people giving the appearance of wanting to help others struggling through these moments, but they do it through the space of their own pain and suffering, rather than helping the individual see a bigger picture.  Often people resonate with what others are experiencing and because they have not fully dealt with the pain residing in their own life from these moments, they push the other person to just move on.  They don't want the other person to be in that space because it reminds them of something that is still so painful to them.

Are Humans One Dimensional?

Manatees at Blue Springs Park
Are Humans One Dimensional?

The more I read news stories each day, the more I wonder about the species of humans on this planet.  It seems that we really limit ourselves in this world by focusing on singular thoughts and consciousness.  It is almost like we as humans are one dimensional. I find that to be a sad testament to the biology of humans.

We see this at play every day of our life.  The most benign conversation has politics interjected into it as if that is the only dimension that can exist.  If someone said the sun was shining, someone else would come along and say it was because of this politician or that politician.  The entire conversation would be one dimensional because in this case and many others like it, politics has nothing to do with the subject at hand.

You see this in medicine because even though there is so much we can do to heal our own body and keep it healthy, the majority of humans in this country think in one dimension.  If it is not about getting medical tests done, taking some prescribed medication, getting a medical procedure or finding some over the counter remedy, humans fail to see beyond this one dimension that it could be a potential healing remedy.  In all reality, most of these things do very little to cure or heal us, but yet we chase them as if they are the only answer to life's problems.  We don't venture into other dimensions of consciousness because we are one dimensional.

We Give Ourself Freedom

Today marks the anniversary of the attacks on the World Trade Center and other locations.  That single day plunged our country into events that will take many years for history to evaluate and rationalize.  Our world has went through so much change during these years.

I still remember having the nightmares leading up to this day and seeing people fleeing a cloud of dust and a building falling.  Little did I realize that those repeated nightmares were a foretelling of an events to come.  It was not until I turned on the TV at the moment the first plane went into the World Trade Center, that I realized the connection with my nightmares.  Normally, I never turn on the TV at that time of day and it was almost like an automated moment within myself.

Since that time, we've learned to hate people who are different than us and so often, our country does not distinguish between people.  We have plunged countries into years of destruction and turmoil as a result.  It can be argued by opposing parties if these things are justified or not, and I'm not here to debate these points.

Freedom In Life

How can we be free within our mind and our body?

That is the question that each one of us needs to ask our self each and every day.

For when we hold ourselves back in life and we are overcome by fear, we give up the freedom that we so desire. When we give up that freedom, we have not yet discovered the awareness of who we are and the purpose we are meant to fulfill.

Freedom starts with embracing our fears, our short comings and our faults. As we embrace these things, so do we find freedom for our lives, our world and the universe.





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Blog Post & Images (c) 7/1/11 Don Shetterly - use by permission only
http://www.donshetterly.com

If any part of this post is used or shared, a link back to this site is required.
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Hope & Possibility Through Trauma Book Quote

From page 13, (Introduction and My Story), is a quote from the book I wrote, Hope And Possibility Through Trauma. This quote sums up so much of what I now see in life and for those who are experiencing some of the most difficult times, hopefully this shows you that there is hope and possibility.

"In the past few years, I have made tremendous progress in reclaiming all that I am. It began with going to massage school and continued through the trauma recovery work that Dr. Canali does. Slowly but surely, I began to reclaim those parts of my body that had been so traumatized. As I have done this, I am finding a sense of freedom, full of hope and possibility, unlike anything I have ever known. At one time, I was not sure if I could heal from these wounds and scars on my life, but now, I see there is a way through."

- Don Shetterly, Pg 13 - Hope And Possibility Through Trauma

Report Child Abuse

Sometimes we do not see what is right before our eyes. Maybe it is because what we need to see is so horrible that it is easier to ignore it. Perhaps, what is before us does not fit into our view of the world. Of course, if we are not aware of what it is that we see, the images could be unrecognizable before our eyes.

I remember a scene in the movie, What The Bleep, when there was a person standing on the shore of the ocean looking outward. At first, she could not see anything in the distance. Then, she could not understand that which she saw. It was not until the Native American came along and touched her awareness that she then recognized and became conscious of the ships in the ocean. They had been there the entire time but until she became consciously aware of them, they were unknown dots on the horizon.

Recently, a friend of mine had a child who was approached by a man they knew. He made a statement that could sound innocent if you weren't paying attention. But if you allowed yourself a moment to think about it and become consciously aware, it would creep anyone out. Then, if you started adding in all the other unusual behavior that you had seen by this person, a picture would form. It would clearly show that this situation was not normal and the authorities needed to be contacted.

While this friend recognized these things as being unusual, they confronted the individual directly. Of course, he had an explanation that sounded almost plausible. Yet, it had many holes in it and just did not fully add up. The child was then instructed to stay clear of this house and as far as I know, the authorities were not contacted.

Yes, I do realize that nothing actually happened and the conversation between the man and the child could be analyzed in various ways. However, there were so many red flags that were showing up. Child molesters are crafty, cunning and sneaky. They know how to get children to do things that children would not otherwise do. Maybe the person will not pursue this child any further, but these type of people are skilled at finding their prey. They should never be underestimated and forgotten under any circumstances.

In addition, if my hunch is correct, then there is a chance that other children may be in danger. Of course, no one knows for sure because the authorities have not been contacted. Other children may be experiencing horrendous acts just because everyone is staying silent. We may not want to rock the boat and interfere with the lives of people we know. We may fear them or what could happen, so we remain silent.

If children are being harmed and we stay silent, than we are as much of the problem as the perps who get away with these things. This may sound harsh, but if we don't stand up for the children and expose these perps to the light of day, who will do this? Child abuse molesters know that silence is their greatest weapon outside of the shame that they inflict on their victims.

When I was a child, I went through horrendous abuse. While there is a chance that we hid these secrets deep within our family, I can't help but think that someone saw it and questioned it. Someone out there saw the red flags and did nothing. For whatever reason, everyone that knew us, stayed silent. Oh, how I wished someone would have stood up for me because there was no way I could stand up for myself. I was a small child that was overpowered by those that molested me. I feared for my life and was powerless against my father and older brother.

If you see something taking place or you see the red flags, do not sit silently. Confronting the potential perp is a good step but it may not be enough. Contact your local authorities. Who knows, there may be other similar things being reported and your piece of the story might just form the picture required to take action and save other children.

To sit back and do nothing is inexcusable. You have to follow your intuition that has noticed those red flags. To do anything less, is closing your eyes to your own awareness and consciousness. Remember child molesters know how to prey upon children. Please do not let these perps manipulate your thinking and throw you off the trail of evidence. Our children deserve our protection. They deserve to live life in freedom, not in silence and shame.


*Read other articles on Mind Body Thoughts Blog

Freedom From Pain

It is so easy it seems to resist things in life. While resistance sounds difficult, it is by far something we do frequently as humans. This may be through our thoughts, our bodies and even in our spiritual growth and overall learning in our lives. We do this without notice and we do this without giving it much thought.

When we resist, we can see evidence of it in the body. Many people would describe the resistance as tight, tense or painful areas in the body. It may show up through physical illness, unexplained medical conditions or common things like headaches, flu, colds. It may be one of the many symptoms drug companies use to increase their profits. Resistance as I found out in my own personal life may even be itching and rashes. We all know to some degree the things where we hold resistance in our own bodies. Sometimes we are more aware and conscious of these things. At other times, we are disconnected from these parts of our life.

At one time, I would get migraine headaches, stomach problems such as a nervous stomach, and tense muscles. These things would attack me as if there was no tomorrow. During these times, I would visit the doctor looking for help to get me out of pain. They would prescribe Imitrex for the headaches, Tagamet for the nervous stomach or give me muscle relaxers, all in an attempt to help heal my pains. At least at the time, I thought this was the only way a person could take care of themselves. I thought this was what health care was all about and staying healthy.

I went through some very difficult moments in life suffering from these conditions. Each time they would occur, I would question myself, as to why they were showing up. It took me many years to begin realizing and learning that the true source of my pain was resistance. Of course, the resistance was often cloaked in fear to throw me off the trail and confuse me. Fear, as I have learned, is much more powerful than we often allow ourselves to understand.

Once I began to learn that much of the pain I experienced in life was resistance, my life began to change. These things that I suffered from became messages that my body was giving me. They were helping me to change, evolve and grow as a human. They were helping me to consciously grow in my own awareness. It wasn't just about the pain that I was encountering at that moment in my life. Without the pain, my knowledge of so much in life would have been limited. My growth and evolution would have been limited.

If you're overwhelmed in life, all you really want is for someone to give you answers and take you out of pain. You want the magic solution in life that will do this. In those moments of pain and suffering, not much else matters. There is a health care industry in existence today that works to take us away from the pain. In fact, there are many new age, alternative therapies out there that attempt to do this as well.

Reaching for the pill bottles or hanging by every word a doctor or new age guru tells you, most likely will do nothing for you in the long term. Yes, it may make you temporarily feel good, but it is a short term fix that is nothing more than an illusion. It will rob you blind while leaving you smiling that something something was actually done.

The suffering and pain we experience are there for a reason. They are messages given to us by our bodies to help us. Masking them, avoiding them or hoping they will go away is a false prophet selling false illusions of magic and snake oil.

Resistance is not allowing these messages into our awareness and consciousness. Whatever they may be, there is some reason they are showing up. There is some fear that is present in our minds. Only we know as individuals what our bodies and minds are trying to tell us. While resistance may be one way we deal with things in our life, it will not solve our problems. It will not make our pain go away.

We must go into the pain if we wish to let go. The answers we need are within us. While others may help support and guide our way to discovery, it is up to us to stop resisting. It is up to us to consciously choose to allow these pains to exist. We are the explorers of our own body and we are the ones that will discover our own truths.

For when we allow our pain and suffering, it is at that point we are reclaiming our power. We are overcoming the fear that is present and we are truly healing ourselves. By going into these pains, we are evolving in conscious awareness connecting to our minds and bodies. It is there that we will find freedom from our pain and our suffering. It is all up to us and how much we allow this to happen. The power to do this resides within ourselves and if we tap into it, the limits of what we can do for our lives is beyond any limits known to man.


(Above Picture taken of Space Shuttle Launch - (c) 08/08/07)


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The Secrets We Hold

Lately I've thought about all the secrets we hold as humans and they are many. Often times, we do not even own up to the ones that we hold so closely. Yet, they are numerous. Many justify these subconsciously in our minds every day and reinforce them through behaviors, beliefs, rituals and routines. The secrets can range from the more subtle to the extreme, from the almost innocent in appearance to the ones that would make a sensational news story on the nightly news.

In my own life, I've been told some whoppers! The secrets that have been carried down were once referred to me as "skeletons in a closet". I was told that often it is best to leave the skeletons alone because everyone has them. But is it really best to leave the skeletons alone in our closets? Who does that protect or benefit or hurt?

While everyone could make a strong compelling argument that holding on to these secrets is a way of protecting various people in our lives, the same case could be made that these same secrets hurt many more than they protect. We don't often think of that or of the people it may hurt when the secrets are formed. We don't often think of the future ramifications and the distortion of events that will occur with years of continued secrecy. It is as if, we are only trying to protect ourselves or someone close to us at the expense of others around us.

In my life, I have spent many years trying to uncover the hidden secrets in my life and of those around me. I have attempted to remain as an open book as much as I can and yet, I'm sure if I think about it, I have secrets that I have formed. And now, as I try to heal the intricate pieces of my life, there are many that are missing because they are locked up as secrets. Some of the secrets have gone to a grave and some will just never be told.

I can just hear the chatter going on in minds at this moment including, you should just move on, you should just let it go, you should not live in the past and so on and so forth. Those are wonderful statements for people who want to sweep the floor and push the dirt under the rug. However, I am one that would rather sweep the dirt out the front door, just not under the rug.

If you think secrets aren't as bad as I'm suggesting they are, than consider this.

Remember back when the Catholic Priests were being accused of child molestation? Each individual child thought it was just them and them alone. They did not realize anyone else had ever been molested by this person (generally speaking). So if they were ever to tell, in their minds they would question if anyone would ever believe them. However, when they began to expose the secrets, others realized they weren't the only ones and they began to tell their secrets. When the secrets were exposed in unison, it gave validity to what was actually going on. Otherwise, it would have continued to be covered up and allowed to continue.

For me, I was told when my grandmother passed away and I was just a wee little child, she was walking home from the neighbors house across the street and she slipped and died. To a little kid, that may make sense and a child may not be able to reason that this sounds ludicrous. And maybe this was part of the story but when you begin to lay in other facts around that event, you can see that there is probably more to the story. My grandfather was a proud member of the Masons who was an alcoholic. I remember my mom telling me stories of how he would spend more time with his Mason brothers getting drunk and drinking away what little money they had. I also learned that he was a mean drunk where he would hit and abuse his wife and my mom. This continued I believe until the day my grandmother died. Right after her death, my grandfather had an auction to sell off everything he owned and I mean everything. He then took the money and checked himself into a nursing home. Keep in mind, there was nothing wrong with him physically that he needed round the clock care. So he checked himself into the nursing home and laid in a bed hardly ever leaving his room for the remaining 10 years of his life. One could say he didn't take her death well and that could be but when you saw how the family behaved and that no one except my mom went to visit him, than you had to question a lot of things. Even the day he died, there barely was a funeral with anyone present. Again, the secret of how my grandmother died will never be proven for sure but I highly doubt she died because she fell while walking across the street.

Take another example with my older brother. On the night of my highschool prom, my parents received a call and had to travel 90 miles to Des Moines because my brother had just been accused of molesting two little boys that he was babysitting in the family that was giving him a home. I believe the family was either from the same church he went to or the Faith Baptist Bible college in Ankeny, Iowa he was attending. I have no idea what transpired because I was not there but I know that somehow the charges were dropped. Those two little boys had to grow up with the after shocks of what he did to them for the rest of their life while my older brother went free. Of course, if I would have been strong enough to stand up and tell someone, maybe I could have prevented others from being hurt. But it was my secret and the secret was not only belonged to my older brother but to my father as well. And one has to ponder just how many more there are out there that were affected by this secret.

For a long time, I began to go to therapy but I kept it a secret from everyone around me. Those at work were told I had something personal to do and I would try to schedule therapy appointments late in the day. My fear was that if everyone knew, they would think I was crazy and would think there was something wrong with me. It was shame, guilt and a poor self esteem that kept me from talking. It was more though because I had been conditioned to believe that if I exposed the secret, that my life would be in danger as had been proven on many occasions as a kid. As I got closer and closer to talking about some things, my secret came out in full force because even though no one in my family knew where I lived or that I was even seeing a therapist, I was so afraid to talk. I was afraid of the secrets I held. I was afraid of the power the secrets held.

I could go on and on with stories of many secrets. They are so numerous and are bountiful beyond comprehension to most people. As I try to piece things together in my life, to fill in the gaps that the years portray, I am met constantly with many secrets. For me, it is more than just needing to move on and to get over it. For me, so much of my past seems so disjointed. I have many questions as to where I come from, where I lived, how different memories even fit together and those things act as volcanoes in my mind, going off when I least expect them. It is about piecing my life back together where I have very little connected contact to it. Most people are able to talk to friends, family and relatives and reflects upon points in their life. For me, this is virtually non existent. For a long time, I wondered if I was adopted because all I know is the town I was born in and where I am at now in life. The things in between seem to have never existed. They were covered up by the secrets.

Most of my secrets were pretty dramatic but even the less dramatic secrets have an energy all to their own that robs us as being human. They make us less than human because shame, guilt, fear among other things, place a blanket over them. They hide them from our view. They alter us from reality. These secrets continue to not only consume us but perpetuate themselves so that they consume others in our path. Secrets not only affect us but they also impact so many others that we know intimately or we casually meet in our lives.

The purpose for writing all of this is that I hope each person reading it will stop and consider the secrets they hold in their own lives. What ones have you created? What ones were created and forced upon you? What ones do you know about and feel you are the only one?

I hope that you will ask yourselves these hard questions because the more light that can be placed on the secrets to expose them, the more freedom we will have as individuals and as a collective universe. In order to be truly human, secrets can not take up residence in our lives for they are an organism of poison feeding on our mind, body and spirit. May they be found out and may they be exorcised from all that we are. Let the secrets wither and die in the light of truth and knowledge.

Independence Day

One of my favorite songs by Martina McBride is "Independence Day". It seems only fitting to post this on our day of Independence for the United States.

Here's the lyrics:

Independence Day


Well she seemed all right by dawn’s early light though she looked a little worried and weak she tried to pretend he wasn’t drinkin’ again but daddy left the proof on her cheek and I was only eight years old that summer and I always seemed to be in the way so I took myself down to the fair in town on Independence day

Well word gets a round in a small, small town they said he was a dangerous man but mama was proud and she stood her ground she knew she was on the losin’ end some folks whispered some folks talked but everybody looked the other way and when time ran out there was no one about on independence day

Chorus: let freedom ring, let the white dove sing let the whole world know that today is a day of reckoning let the weak be strong, let the right be wrong roll the stone away, let the guilty pay, it’s independence day

Well she lit up the sky that fourth of July by the time the firemen come they just put out the flames and took down some names and send me to the county home now I ain’t sayin’ it’s right or it’s wrong but maybe it’s the only way talk about your revolution it’s independence day

Repeat chorus

Roll the stone away it’s independence day

A video by Martina McBride for this song on Youtube - click here