Struggling But Hopeful

Right now, life is difficult.  It isn't easy to hang on or go forward or function.  I'm struggling quite hard right now but I'm hopeful things will change.  That's my hope at least and its all I have to cling to at this moment.  All else is just words and thoughts and philosophies.

Sometimes we are tested to the ends of our rope.  Sometimes we bring this on for ourselves, but never-the-less we have to deal with what is in our day.  Running from it or hiding from it won't help us overcome it.

I've burnt the candle at both ends of the stick.  I could list the reasons why I do this, but they are insignificant at this moment.  For now, while I'm struggling, I remain hopeful that I will find my way back home in my life.

Ridiculous Platitudes

Every day they are posted and re-posted and spammed and slammed on social media sites around the world.  There is no shortage of them.  They are the ridiculous platitudes.  You know, the ones that make everything in life to be plausible in one short little statement.

Growing up, my father had all kinds of them.  Most of the time they really didn't fit the situation or make sense, but that didn't stop him.  Most people are the same way.  I would often hear Norman Vincent Peale thoughts spouted as if they were equal to the bible.  Of course, he neglected to realize just how awful he was abusing those around him while spouting the platitudes. 

We've all see the various statements.  Most of the time people don't have any clue what to say, so its far easier to just spout something off, regardless if it helps or not.  It makes them feel good and then they go merrily on their way.  Unfortunately, far too often these statements do more harm then good.

Body Healing and Movement

Body issues often arise from the moments of torture, abuse or other experiences we go through.  If we allow those to continue to take up residence within, then they are holding dominion over us.  They have robbed us of our power.

It is up to us to allow ourselves to free the trapped energy of these moments from our body.  Through a Unified Therapy healing session, I realized that the movements I was experiencing on the table were a direct result of what I had been through.  You can read more about this on Somatosync.com.

Embracing Mediocrity

Too many people and too many businesses just don't see the whole picture.  Some think that if they try to much, what is the point.  Some think that if too much is expected, then it makes them look bad.  Why do people, businesses, governments, and organizations embrace mediocrity?

I've worked with far too many people and places in this.  Its almost like they just want to put in their time, collect some money, and go home.  They take very little or no pride in the quality of what they put out.  Its more about gimme the money and don't ask me to do correctly what it is that you're paying me to do.

I've seen far too many organizations and governments and other places do just enough to get by and not go beyond that.  Its easier to be part of the status quo then to hold expectations of being all that you can be.  Its far easier to just get by, then go above and beyond.

Time is My Most Precious Asset

Lately, I have been pushed and pulled in many directions.  My cell phone has become a ball and chain.  Email consumes me.  Everyone needs me.  Everyone demands my  time.  However, time is my most precious asset.

I navigate these moments trying to figure out how to do what it is that I am expected to do, but yet maintain my life and find a center point in the day.  Most other people could care less that my life is being intruded upon.  It is like a thief in the night that visits you all day long.

I try to push back, but it seems like it takes more energy then I have to give.  I become exhausted by the fight and by the pushing back.  Yet, no one seems to care.  They hold the baseball bat of what is expected over my head, waiting to make me flinch if I dare stand up and say no.

I feel like I'm in a room full of children that won't take "NO" for an answer.  Even if they hear "NO" the first time, they keep asking and demanding as if you had not said it moments ago.  It becomes irritating and more stressful than words can describe.  It begins to haunt me day and night.

Terrified Of Body Contact

It wasn't that long ago that I struggled with being close to other people.   I wanted touch so badly from others, but I was terrified of it.  I knew my body had been violated, but I never pieced it together in those moments.  I was so very terrified of body contact.

I kept people at a distance from me.  I didn't let people touch my back, touch my arms or anything else.  The touch was terrifying.  It would make my skin crawl as if ants were walking up and down my body.  It would make me nauseous.  It would make me angry.  I would feel helpless and almost like I was being abused and raped and violated all over again.

People often think that unsolicited hugs are a good thing.  To someone that hasn't been violated sexually and physically, they most likely are.  However, in my case, they are not.  You had better be someone I completely trust and feel safe with or you will be giving me the heebie-jeebies.  You had better ask permission or I will be left feeling like you had just physically assaulted and tortured me.  There are few people who can readily hug me and I feel safe and warm and loved.  Even for the people I feel safe with, they know to check in with me before just attempting to hug me.

Going Into The Bad Places Of Healing

Sometimes it is very difficult to go in and truly heal.  We want to escape the bad parts and just focus on the good parts of healing.  It is human nature to do this.

Unfortunately, in order to truly heal, one must embrace the bad parts as an observer and allow themselves to wander into this space.  It is where true healing takes place.

Please visit my blog post on the Somatosync.com website for further discussion on this topic.

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Blog Post And Images (c) 5/11/15 by Don Shetterly

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How Much Can I Take

The intensity is strong.  The willpower is strong.  Time is limited and energy is in short supply.  I ponder these things as I think at this very moment, just how much can I take?  How much more can life dish out. How much more can I absorb before life is too much.

I'm strong.  I can take a lot in life.  I've been through enormous amounts of difficulty and stress throughout my days.  However, I also know that as strong as I am, there are limits on the physical body.  This pace is not good.  It is not healthy.  I'm not ready to give up my life for any company or job and that feels like what I'm doing.

Business doesn't seem to get the "human" part of life.  I know that we honor slogans and make it appear that we do, but few really honor and respect being human.  Its a part of profits and greed along with power and control.

Physical Body Issues

We need to have a chat about this topic.  I mean, while most of us truly understand this, somehow it has been hidden from our consciousness and so its like we don't understand much about physical body issues.

Everyone wants to blame physical body issues on some "name" or "condition" or "health condition".  While they may be the result of this and you might be able to prove that it is true, you're missing half the equation of healing.

Its like having a hole in the bottom of your rowboat and you think that the only way to keep sailing is to take a paper cup and empty out the water.  You only focus on the paper cup (i.e. the name or condition or health situation) and focusing on it to take care of the issue which is water coming into your rowboat.

When Life Gets Away From You

Another from my daily journal where I try to make sense of things that seem beyond my control.  I write to understand.  I write to find my way through.  I write in my journal to make sense out of that which I can't seem to control.

When life gets away from you, what are you to do?  Where are you to go?  Do you run and hide?  Do you run and flee from everyone you know?

When life gets away from you, what is the next step?  Where do you turn?  Can you even begin to find the way back to that which you seek.

Lately, it feels like life has gotten away from me.  What I once had, no longer exists.  Too much heartache and pain has come knocking on my door.  There has been far too much stress in the job to even have a moments rest.

Bully In The Workplace

I figure I'm not the only one dealing with this situation.  Most likely many people who go to work have to put up with this and no one in top management seems to care.  It is like, see no evil, hear no evil.   I mean if you don't acknowledge it, it just doesn't exist right.

It really is sad these days because we have far too many bullies.  Whether it is the workplace or in politics or law enforcement or churches or schools or I could go on and on and on.  They are just everywhere and they think they have the right to run everyone's life.

Here are some ways that I've seen bullies at work.

In Honor And Tribute To Mom

On Mother's Day, we all stop to say 'thank you' to a very special lady in our lives.  For each of us, it is different in how we celebrate and honor this day.  Our moms mean so much to us and to list all they do would take many hours, days, or weeks.

My mom put up with a lot from an abusive husband, an older brother that constantly challenged her and people who just didn't get her.  She had so much to offer, but was often overlooked because of how mild and meek she could be.

I remember my mom saying "sometimes it takes a stronger person to just not say anything" when another individual is yelling and screaming and being obnoxious.  She knew that when the going got tough, the tough got going and that was one of her favorite thoughts.

She was a lady of class, but very simple and down to earth.  She knew how to whip up a beautiful dinner, and go outside and do lawn work.  She knew how to put her all into a job, but come home to a family that she so cared for deeply.