Monday, August 9, 2010

Surrender Into Acceptance

Acceptance of all things in life is not always easy. In fact, for me, it is often difficult. I can easily give lip service that I do accept and allow all things but in reality, it isn't that easy. It sometimes is difficult to match words with actions.

I tend to worry a lot and so badly want to be the one that makes everything happen. It may be a throwback when my life seemed like it was not under my control. In fact, I'm sure my life was controlled by others, not by me for a very long time. So now, I have learned to compensate for this in my life by trying to control many aspects of my day.

The only thing is that I give myself a false illusion that I am really controlling all these parts of my life. it robs me of so much precious energy. It keeps a protective distance to the unfamiliar. It gives me an imbalance that I rarely take note of. it is like the magician doing his magic act where one event occurs while the eyes are being tricked to see something else.

Yet, life has tied to teach me in many ways to accept things. It has shown me that worry gets me nowhere. Even though these lessons have been numerous in my life, I still forget them. They are my teachers that I have long forgotten. Of course, I have made progress in this area but I still desire to control everything about my life. It is a beloved and hated twin that I desire to flee from.

Now, I'm left to wonder how it is that I can change my current mode of worry into acceptance of what is. I know it has to be more than saying to myself that I'm going to do this. I know that acknowledging it is a helpful step but again how do I spot the lion before it is at the moment of attack. These are million dollar questions. Just like in one movie, an actor states that the secret to life is this one thing. Of course for each person, it is different and each person has to figure it out for themselves.

Maybe one step I could take is by giving myself the option of noticing when I am worrying and trying to control everything in my life. That may be a very tall order but in order to change something, one has to recognize it exists. Until there is recognition, one remains in the dark.

Maybe another step I could take is that when I recognize that I am doing this, I could state the word "accept" to my mind's ear. If my ears heard this, hopefully my brain and subconscious mind would listen to it. At a minimum, a different option would be available that could provide a different experience to me.

Just recognizing the fears I feel and the connections to past moments of my life may help allow me to surrender into acceptance. For if I run from these parts of my life, I know that it is as if I'm running in place. My legs may be moving, but I'm not going anywhere.

Asking the angels (or the universe or my higher self) to help and assist in this, may offer significant strength in my endeavor. It may be the catalyst of source energy that will transcend any effort I could put forth.

In the end, surrender is the key. How I get there is my journey. Each part of it may be difficult at times, but it is full of value to my life. To not experience all of this would be robbing my life of so much. For all these things are who I am. They are my teachers. They are my freedom, my awareness and my growth.


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