If You Care - Show It

Written By Don Shetterly

Don't just state the word, I care and stop there!  If you care, show it!

I get so frustrated by people who say they care and want to be involved in your life, but their actions are a million miles from that point.

Yes, I know that I've got issues with this, but some people don't seem to put things together in the brain.  I'd just rather not hear the words come out of their mouth.  Then I would have no expectations that they care.  I'd be pleasantly surprised than let down.

See, that's the thing!  If you tell someone something and then don't follow through, it is one big let down.  If you honor what you say then you enrich your life and theirs.

I find it very offensive and disrespectful to hammer into someone's mind that you care and then you fail to show it.  If you care, show it!  It is that simple.

We've got too much hyperbole in this world today with screaming matches going on with other people.  We don't need more inauthenticity.  We don't need more words spoken.  What this world needs is people who are genuine and authentic and do what they say they will do.

It really hurts when you're treated this way.  The pain inflicts a million stabs into the heart.  May we all learn the basics of what being human is about because the world needs that more than ever.  We have gone too far the other way in this civilization.

So, if you care - SHOW IT!

---

Blog Post And Images (c) 01/1/18 by Don Shetterly

• Permission required in writing before any part of this blog is reprinted, reworded, transmitted or used in any format. 
• Feel free to share the blog post LINK and a brief summary.  

---

Forked Tongues and Authenticity

I grew up in a home where we were told one thing and yet witnessed something totally different by that individual.  It was commonplace for people to speak with forked tongue.

Often these same people that railed against doublespeak were the ones that did it the most.  There was no authenticity, even though they believed that they were authentic.  They felt that what they told others was what mattered, not what they practiced in their own life.

I see this playing out in almost every minute of our day.  Whether it is in politics, on the TV, or online, I hardly see "authenticity" showing up.  Yes, everyone thinks that it is the other person that does this, not them.  How foolish we are!

Like Judge Judy, I'm one of those people that can spot a liar a million miles away (or should I say someone that is not authentic.)  It takes me a split second.  Okay, maybe liar is a little too strong of a word here, but if your words don't match up with what I know about you or if they don't match up with your body language, I'm rolling my eyes.

The online inauthentic people...

Even when it comes to online, I can generally spot the "inauthentic" people quickly and I become wary of anything they say.  They often rail against certain things in life and those same things consume everything they share on social media.  Yet, they often do the very things they despise.

I quit watching the news years ago because it is nowhere near authentic.  I don't understand why anyone watches it these days and I mean "ANY" news.  Everyone goes to their corner of what they believe is true and the news media backs it up.  It isn't necessarily one side or the other on most issues.  It happens on both sides.  There is no authenticity in it whatsoever because it is so often for entertainment purposes.

Inauthentic Marketing...

Let's not forget the ones that equate marketing with spamming, trying to get you to buy their stuff even if it doesn't pass the sniff test.  Marketing these days has become a barrage of waste material constantly thrown at us.  It is not about what the person needs.  It is more about just shoving it down everyone's throat.  There is no authenticity in marketing these days.  It is cloaked in the forked tongue.

There are so many ways we speak with forked tongues but if you try to point that out, no one wants to truly listen.  If they listen, they don't always want to change.  We'd rather point the fingers at others than go in and do what we need to do to help make ourselves human.

I think that if you are authentic, it will show through.  You don't have to grandstand and prove to others you are authentic.  You just need to live your life through authenticity.  When you no longer speak with forked tongue, people will know they can trust what you say.  Whether that is online or in politics or the media and marketing, people will know it when they hear it.

I realize we live in a fake reality these days, but if we don't start turning the ship around and learning how to be human by being authentic, we're going to hit the iceberg and sink.  It isn't up to anyone else to do what needs to be done.  It is up to each one of us individually to take stock of our own life and make the changes necessary for the survival of this planet and our species.

---

Blog Post And Images (c) 2017 by Don Shetterly

• Permission required before any part of this blog post is reprinted, reworded or used in any form. 
• You are welcomed to share the LINK to this blog post.  

---

Sometimes I Weep For People

Nope, this isn't a happy post, but it is what is on my heart.  Sometimes to make sense of things or attempt to grab on to the last rung of the ladder, I write what is on my mind.

Maybe this is not always what everyone wants to read or hear, but it is how I've written this blog for the past several years.  I share deeply from my heart and my own vulnerability.

Sometimes I weep for people.  Lately, that's been much of the time.  I see so much and I cannot for the life of me understand why humans do what they do to one another.  Here's some of the examples I've witnessed that grind my heart up to not end.

Examples:

1. Example 1:  We care and we're here for you, but please enjoy our silence as that is about as far as it goes.  I know people mean well, but their actions don't match their words.  I stand in confusion wondering if it is something I did or they are just too busy or they just don't realize what their words mean.  Maybe it is something else, but it is far too complicated for me to understand.
2. Example 2:  I only will communicate with you if you believe the way I do or talk the way I think you should or follow what I think you should do in your own life.  Of course, they don't come right out and say this but they practice it diligently.  I am at a loss with words and understanding how I have to believe or say things or act according to how others view life.  It just doesn't make sense and unfortunately it happens far too often.
3. Example 3:  I am one-sided in my viewpoints.  I can't accept your point of view because it is wrong.  I will label you and call you names to prove my point and just constantly say that I know what is best and your stupid.  I'll do this in horrific ways so that you really feel as low as you can feel.  After all, I'm right and you're wrong.  I just tend to walk away from these people because I have no desire to fight with someone that is intent on not listening to anything I say.
4. Example 4:  Let me show you how wrong you are and I will do it constantly every moment of the day.  Whether it is social media or a blog or talking to people, boy - just let me show you how wrong you are.  It is my responsibility to show ignorance to those who practice is how this type of behavior goes for people in this example.  There's no one else in their minds that holds any truth, but them.  I'm so saddened when I see this happening at a frequency my mind cannot even begin to comprehend.
5. Example 5:  They've got a one track mind - yes I do, states the ones that do this.  Nothing else matters but their single focused issue or belief or viewpoint.  It is all or nothing.  It is frequent and in your face.  If you don't fully accept their premise and think and talk about whatever the subject is 100% of the time, there's something wrong with you in their eyes.  It is their way or the highway!

All of these things and more are practiced every day by those who don't think they do any of this.  Some are pretty convincing that they are normal and everyone else is wrong.

These things hurt the fabric of our society. It hurts us being human to one another.  It makes us into enemies, rather than fellow travelers on this earth.

No, none of us is perfect and we all make mistakes.  Let's just not go embrace them as the norm while we degrade, tear down and rip apart other people.  It makes me weep for people.  It really does. My heart hurts when I see this behavior.

Respect for one another starts when you stop labeling others and calling them names.  Respect for one another starts when you stop to listen and love another without trying to convince them your way is correct or you know what is best for them.

There is so much noise in our day and if we fail to listen, but keep screaming our point of view - we're only adding to the noise.  We're not doing anyone any good.

If you've not done any of these things ever in your life, then my hat is off to you.  Please write a book and share with the rest of the world how this is done because it is badly needed.  Unfortunately, I think we've all crossed the line a few times and right now in our world, the majority of people are truly crossing the line.

Let's not take our deficiencies we see in ourselves out on everyone else.  It isn't their fault that we haven't healed a part of our life or progressed past the thought processes and beliefs we were taught.  Yes, we don't like to admit we do any of this, but it only takes a few minutes to observe it in action just about anywhere you go.

Let's celebrate others and share with one another what we've learned and what we've experienced.  It helps us find our own footing on this treacherous path that is called life.  We need each other to make it in a hostile world.  We definitely don't need to inflict pain upon others that ends up making them weep with sadness.

How can you begin this moment to let your words match your actions and let your love shine through greater than your own ego?

#Authentic

---

Blog Post And Images (c) 2017 by Don Shetterly

• Permission required before any part of this blog post is reprinted, reworded or used in any form. 
• You are welcomed to share the LINK to this blog post.  

---

Are Humans Really That Hateful

I see a meanness online these days and it truly bothers me.  If you think I should not be bothered by it, then this blog post is not for you.  In fact, I just got called out for caring about what gets forced in front of our eyes every day.  You can't avoid it, unless you just don't go online.

I have to wonder though, are humans as hateful as they show online?  Do they really hate others as much as their words and actions show?  Or is there a major disconnect and the what people show online is different than they actually are?

My next question would lead me to authenticity.  If you can't be the same online that you are in person to your friends, coworkers and acquaintances, then which persona should we believe?  Who really are you?

I think this matters greatly because by treating each other with so much hatred while proclaiming we are great individuals, is extremely harmful to the world-at-large.  Words, actions, and thoughts do matter.  A thought born out of love can really help someone's day while thoughts born out of hate can really incite significant pain upon others.

We can't just sit back and hide our heads in the sand, because it truly matters.  How we treat others is propagated on to other people many times over.  It hurts.  It harms.  It keeps people hunkering down in their caves of anxiety and depression.

How we treat others is what helps this world advance or decline!  I'm sorry if that goes against your beliefs and opinions, but you can just take a look at humanity through the ages and see how true this is. 

The world is difficult enough on our good days and if we can't walk hand-in-hand together towards a better outcome, will this world even make it?  If we stand opposed and fight and nitpick and manipulate with our opinions and beliefs, may the world somehow survive because the odds are against it in this scenario.

Yes, it does matter if we truly understand whether humans are really that hateful with one another.  To ignore this, is being part of the problem that self-propagates throughout online social media.  We had better wake up before it is too late.  In this case, there will not be any do overs.

#Hate

---

Blog Post And Images (c) 2017 by Don Shetterly

• Permission required before any part of this blog post is reprinted, reworded or used in any form. 
• You are welcomed to share the LINK to this blog post.  

---

Throw Words Together And Mean Something

There, I just did it.  Hey, why not be like all the major reporting outlets and newspapers and social media interactions?  Just throw some words together and have it mean something.  It doesn't matter if what you say makes any sense.  It doesn't matter anymore.

No longer do we need proper grammar or sentence structure.  It doesn't matter if you really communicate your thought, because after all, you're just trying to throw words together.  Social media has made this so much worse because no one communicates anymore.

Its hard enough to get your point across without just obliterating the meaning by throwing words together.  Yet, it doesn't stop anyone.  When you have to read something over and over again to try and figure out what you just read, there is a problem.

I'm not perfect either.  I know this.  However, I at least attempt to explain things in the best way that I can, so the point I'm trying to make is clear.  I don't try to game the system by slapping keywords together, one after another.  I don't try to play games just to get people to click.

Authenticity is lacking so much in online social media.  It's more about getting your own ego stroked than it is making a difference in the world.  It's all about the 'me' part of social media and not even beginning to ask, does what I do truly make a difference in the lives of other people?  Does what I do truly bring something good and positive into the world?

Improve the world...

There is far too much stuff posted online in a day and in the media, so let's try to improve the world by making what we share count for something good.  Let's help make the world a better place by posting and sharing content which makes a difference.  Let's stop wasting everyone's time with repeated material just so we can get noticed.

Let's show the world by our words and actions that we are authentic. 

---

Blog Post And Images (c) 2016 by Don Shetterly

• Permission required before any part of this blog post is reprinted, reworded or used in any form. 
• You are welcomed to share the LINK to this blog post.  

---

Observing Authenticity

I constantly am observing life and how we interact with our world and other inhabitants that walk this earth.  I've been a people watcher from the time I was very young or as far back as I can remember.  People are interesting creatures and often times, it is better than any movie I could ever watch.

Yet, as I observe how I fit into this world, I see that I am often measured and filtered with respect to where I go, what I do and how I allow the rest of the world to see me.  Sometimes I go overboard on this and other times I am probably too lenient on myself.  It is almost like I try to navigate through life using my reference with the world as stars to chart my course.

One of the things I know that I do is I hold back.  I'm afraid to make mistakes and afraid to fail.  God knows I'm not perfect and even when I try to present that front to the world, it becomes an illusion.  Often times I want to make sure the world knows that I have everything together even when I'm crumbling inside.

I still remember when I was recovering from my paralysis as a result of Conversion Disorder (also known as Functional Neurological Disorder- FND) and finally getting back in touch with friends, that a friend made a profound comment to me about my life.  He said in shock and disbelief, "you were in the hospital because you could not handle life and stress got the best of you  - you of all people?  Why, we thought out of the group of us friends, you were the one that had it all together!"