Tuesday, March 22, 2016

Eliminating Toxic People Is Wrong

I see this subject come up all the time.  People urge others to eliminate toxic people from their lives.  Actually I believe this is wrong and it is anything but human to call for this action.

Exactly who are toxic people?  Are they ones that you disagree with and who voices their disagreement?  Are they ones that are struggling and trying to hang on for another day, but their words and thoughts are difficult to be around?  Are they ones that say things that make you uncomfortable, although they may be true?  Maybe it is people that just think differently, act differently, look differently or are different than you.

I mean, if we start classifying people into toxic or nontoxic, do we make it easier for our pious selves to function in this society?  Do we think we are that much better than others that they need to be "shunned" from our existence?

I realize my words are strong right now, but I feel like I need to give a wake up call.  If I'm hitting the sore points for you, please know that I love you like everyone else that I love.  

There are people that are hurting and they need a helping hand.  They don't need the judgment of others who somehow deem themselves to be more advanced and enlightened.  They don't need someone telling them how awful they are for they already know this.

Yet, if you want to eliminate toxic people from your life, I really think you're doing nothing more than hiding your own head in the sand.  You can't deal with your own life, so you tell others to flee from you.  You say, "you're not welcome in my world because something is wrong with you."

Am I being harsh?  Most likely I am.  I'm not telling you that you have to spend all your time around those that drive you nuts or drag you down into the muck with them.

If we are truly human, we will take care of the gunk in our own lives so we can be there for others.  It doesn't mean we have to wallow in the muck, but we can't sit in our own white garments of enlightenment acting all superior over our fellow humans.

Try being human by stopping the constant propagation of meaningless memes on social media and truly being there for someone.  Often they don't need your propaganda and memes.  They usually just need to know that someone is walking beside them, ready to hold their hand if they need it.  It is not words, but action that is needed.

Far too many of us in this world are so pious and self-absorbed that we cannot be there for others.  So, we come up with convoluted ways to tell others to be more like us - so that we feel better about our lives.  Yet, instead of chastising the world, try to be real and uplifting to the world as a result.

Now, I'm climbing down off my own soapbox for the day.  Come back another day to see me climb back up on it.

One last thought though - we really do need each other to be there for us.  Its what truly makes this world go around.  Instead of having the desire to eliminate toxic people, try allowing your heart to hold their hand and help lift them up out of the pain they live in.

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Blog Post And Images (c) 2016 by Don Shetterly

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