When We Let Go

Written by  Don Shetterly

One of the most difficult lessons I have learned in life is this one.  When we let go, that's when we discover what matters.  It seems like we should cling and hold on to what we know, but as I have found, that's when we need to let go.  For in doing so, this is when we discover what we cannot see.  It allows us to make a choice of a new and different awareness.

Broken Regulators In Life

Written By Don Shetterly

Right now, we're not functioning with our mind and our body.  We are half engaged, but we act as if we are fully engaged.  Our human regulator is broken and causing us great suffering in this world.

When we are not aware or conscious, we don't fully engage in life.  We pull back and only put in part of what we need to put into life.  We numb from fear, and we engage from the ego, not from the heart.

Our emotions may be over the top or nonexistent.  Our passion for causing change may have no regulator on it.  Our words become a way to prove that we know more than others. Our ability to slow down and stop or rest has become one of that is a meme, rather than something we do.

We can only exhaust our body systems before they start breaking down.  If we don't deal with the stress that is piling up on us every day, it will be our stalker that attacks us in the night.  There is no way you can exist in life right now without stress having an impact.  Yes, you can numb yourself by wishing it away, but it is still there.  It lurks in the shadows.

When we stay fully engaged all day long through our electronic devices connecting us to every morsel of "breaking news" that others deem is important, we are hurting our mind and body.  Most of this stuff is noise in a day, but we consume it as if it is the last drop of food we will ever see.  It is not healthy in the least bit, but for some reason, we cling to every new feed, tweet, and a bit of gossip as if it is greater than our life.

When we live in fear and we numb, we are disconnecting ourselves from everyone around us.  We put up the wall between them and us, so we continue to operate.  There is far too much that we use to separate ourselves, rather than help to further the world.  The fear and numb is insidious because even though we act like it does not exist in our life, it operates freely behind the closed doors of our life.

We go online and leave comments that prove to the world we know more than they do.  Memes and happy thoughts become what we share with everyone.  Instead of fully engaging on a human and personal way, we fire back those tweets that will put someone in their place.  Instead of expanding our views, we huddle with those that we agree with not seeing others that hold a differing opinion as someone real in life.

Our broken regulators in life keep us from bouncing from one thing to another.  We don't even fully see it because we are not aware and conscious enough to do this.  We've lost the grounding in our body, yet we have convinced it is still there.  We've lost the ability to disengage from the ranting and screaming because we're convinced we have to fight.

In the meantime, love and compassion and respect has disappeared.  We claim we hold these truths in our life, but our actions fail as a witness in court for us.  We struggle physically with health conditions because we are not dealing with life.  Life has dealt with us in a way that we're no longer in control of our body.  Our mind convinces we are, but the body has long ago shut down.

If we want to and if we have the courage and determination, we can wake up in our body.  It is not easy and very few even do this.  The more you have shut down to in life and what you are inside, the more distance you have to travel back to awareness and consciousness.  It can be done, but it is not easy.  Too many stop before they get very far along this journey.

No one can tell you what you already know in your life, even though it is hidden from view.  It takes each one of us going deep within and seeing what is there that we don't want to see.  If we don't fix the broken regulators in life, we're going to end up in a very awful mess - the likes of which we do not see at this moment.

We can wake up if we so choose, but it is a choice.  It is not a bunch of words that you say.  The evidence shows through your life.  No one will be able to claim if you awake or not as that is something that others around you will know without a doubt.

In this world, we have been marching to the edge of the cliff for a long time.  We're not meant to do that.  Instead, we are destined to wake up and grow in awareness and consciousness.  Life is about becoming more of who we are, not succumbing to what the masses convince us is correct.

Each day of our life, we make a choice as to how we will fit in the world.  Our tweets, social media postings, interactions with others and how much we get to know the depths of our innermost self will reflect our awareness and consciousness.

That One Person That Gets Me

Written By Don Shetterly

I love being with that one person that just gets me.  

They are the ones that see past the faults I see in myself.

They are the ones that see potential in me when I see nothing.

When I'm with this person, it makes my life soar to greater heights.

It makes me want to be more than I am and all that I can be.

I love being with that one person that just gets me.

Mental Health Awareness is More Than A Tweet

Written By Don Shetterly

There are some things I'm so annoyed by online that I can't hardly bring myself to think calmly about them.  I keep seeing everyone tweet, like, and share online that we need to promote mental health awareness.

While that is great, this is where it seems to stop.  We don't go any further than a tweet.  We don't really jump into it.  We just tweet, retweet, share and like and feel like we are doing something.

Two times, I've put out real hard information and helpful events that were "free" but in both cases, people ignore it and move on to the next mind-numbing tweet of the day.   There is no sign up for the event.  There is no sharing of the event to help others.

All we do is sit back and like or retweet that we need to bring mental health awareness to the world.  Great - I'm for awareness, but if that is where it stops, then what are we doing?  Are we just puffing up our tweet ego for the day?

If I'm upsetting you, I'm not going to apologize because I see this over and over every day.  Helping others with mental health issues and suicide is much more than saying that's what you do.  People need real help, not words on a screen.

Yes, I know the subjects are difficult to deal with and everyone wants to hide their heads in the sand.  Yes, I know that there are many ways to help and some people do all they can.  However, the number of tweets about mental health awareness far outnumber the actual things people do to really help.

We need to get off of our proverbial social media butts and do something good, rather than just claiming mental health awareness.  When events come along, support them.  Don't just ignore them.  When people need help, be there for them, just don't give them platitudes.

Lastly, if all we do is scream at others for not understanding the pain we are in, then we're not helping them to learn.  We end up turning them away.  Share your story with them.  Share not only your pain and struggle but what is helping you and what you are learning.  Offer a hand of support to others, not a bat to beat them over the heads.

(click to read)

I cringe every time I see the mental health awareness tweets go through because there are far too many that stop at the water's edge.  People struggling with mental health and suicide need others physically to be there for them.  Words on a page do very little.  Thoughts and prayers are empty if no action follows.

Ok, that's my soapbox.  If I have offended you, I'm not going to offer an apology right now.  I want people to be offended so they get up off their proverbial social media butts and do something.  If making someone upset that they aren't doing enough gets someone doing more than this blog post accomplished its purpose.

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Blog Post And Images (c) 2/27/18 by Don Shetterly

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When Everyone Else Is Wrong

Written by Don Shetterly

These days we see this everywhere we turn, but especially in online social media.  When everyone else is wrong has become the norm for the day.

We look at others online or where we live as being wrong while we are right.  Sometimes, maybe far too many times, we see our significant others as the one being wrong, while we are right.

Yet, we don't stop to take a look at things from a comprehensive view.  We just think we are the ones that have the answers and have everything together.  We don't seriously entertain the thought that we might be the problem, not the answer.

Sure, we give lip service that we do take everything into account, and we see all sides of an issue, but the honest truth is, we don't.  I'm sorry if that bursts one too many bubbles, but as humans, we are so good at being disconnected, that we don't see life around us for what it is.

As humans, we've become so good at numbing, avoiding and distraction, that we barely see the issue before us in a complete way as it appears to our eyes.  We've altered truth for our reality.

Whether it is in politics or relationships, or in a boss and employee moment, we often see our side of things.  It could be in the simplest of ways that seem so insignificant, but all too often we think we are right and everyone is wrong.

It is human nature to protect ourselves.  That is the ego, devoid of awareness and consciousness.  It is part of us to walk around seeing only through our filters.

If you find yourself thinking everyone else is wrong, there's something flawed in your thinking.  If you find yourself saying, "but in this situation, they are wrong," you're missing out on something you are not seeing.  Not everyone else is wrong all of the time.  You're not right all of the time.

Instead, if we focus on where we agree and look to learn and understand from those we disagree, we will become wise.  If we allow ourselves to be opened up to that which we despise in the hope of more understanding, we will become wiser.

There is far too much right versus wrong thinking these days.  You see it on social media every day and you see it in relationships and other situations.  It has consumed all parts of our life.

We must learn how to step back from the ego and embrace awareness of our mind body so that consciousness shows us the way.  We must learn to listen and connect with our heart, rather than our head which filters everything we see and hear in our life.

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Blog Post And Images (c) 2/22/18 by Don Shetterly

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Do We Really Want Change?

Written By Don Shetterly

These days I see people pushing one movement or another.  I look at where we are told to "stand up to this issue" or "prevent this issue" or "bring awareness to an issue."  But yet, I wonder if we really want to change.

We give lip service that we do.  We fill our Twitter and Facebook feeds with it, but then our actions portray just the opposite.   Please don't mistake this blog post as being a political one, because it is much bigger than that. I am more focused on mind body health and healing.

I've written some blog posts about intense and difficult subjects.  These are often about the things that everyone wants to stop, prevent, change or bring about through awareness.  Yet, when I share those online, the click rate to the blog post is barely existent.

It appears that we want to help change the world and bring awareness, prevention, or support, but we really don't want to do much more than that.  So, I have to question, do we really want change?

I know... I know..  Everyone will say of course we want change.  Of course we care about our issues, but unfortunately, actions speak louder.  If all you're willing to do is retweet or like or share the fact that you are raising awareness, does that go far enough?  In my view, I don't believe that it does.

I don't even believe it means we have to protest or sign petitions.  I'm not convinced that those always bring about the change we need.  We may think we do, and there may be some evidence of it, but does it really do what we think it does?  To me, it feels more like screaming and boiling water than actually doing something.

After all, if you want to change the world, it begins with each one of us.  It doesn't start by beating someone else over the head to see the world the way we do.  It doesn't begin with bullying someone into believing the way we do.  It starts with how we change our own lives in this world.

It isn't just a thought process in what we think and believe.  From deep within the core of the mind and body, it radiates out energetically as a vibration.  What is genuinely within us is shown to the world.  We may not be conscious of it.  We may not be aware of it, but it is on display.

Do we really want change?  If we do, we'll support conscious behavior that helps others heal.  We will quit focusing on the latest trending story of the day and look beyond to a bigger picture.  If we really want change, we'll start by examining ourselves from the deepest parts, not from our belief system.

I'm not going to stop writing about the hard and challenging subjects.  People may stay in the clouds and not read these things.  That is their choice, but I'm not going to sit by silently.  I'm not going to watch others be abused and remain silenced.

This blog and everything I write is about pushing us beyond our comfort zone.  It is about challenging our beliefs and opinions and current awareness.  I strive to get people who read this blog to think about everything more and in a different light.

We are following a dangerous path in this world, and we really need to ask the hard questions.  I'll leave you with this question one last time:  Do we really want change?  If we do, it must begin with each one of us.  Let our mind body health and healing start within our own continued awareness of what is possible.

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Blog Post And Images (c) 2017 by Don Shetterly

• Permission required before any part of this blog post is reprinted, reworded or used in any form. 
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Avoidance Is Not Helpful

Written By Don Shetterly

This subject is one I still haven't fully learned.  Maybe it is because it is a human condition that we employ when things get a little too tough.  Avoidance is one of my go-to-coping skills, but when I avoid things, I tend to make them worse.  It was my survival tactic growing up in a world full of trauma and abuse.


Take for example the recent tooth pain that I kept trying to mask and ignore.  I found ways to compensate for it that kept me disconnected from it.  I'm amazed at just how far I went so I didn't have to deal with it.  I avoided it instead, and by doing this, I've probably caused myself a lot more expense.

Avoidance is being employed by almost everyone at record setting paces these days.  Times are tough in life right now.  We are going through horrible moments as a civilization on this planet.  The atmosphere and energy all around are divisive and toxic.  Everywhere you look there is something that is upsetting.  Even if you try to distance yourself from all of it, the feeling of that toxic energy is still prevalent.

We Turn To Things That Distract Us...

To deal with it, we do as I did on the tooth pain.  We turn to things that distract us and keep us from dealing with reality.  We consume things to help give us comfort.  We act all happy and smiles when we're crumbling inside.  We put our attention on anything but the moment that is happening before us because it is just too difficult.

Avoidance can be good in the short term.  It may help you get from one moment to the next so you can deal with the issue.  However, when we continue to avoid the issues that are troubling, we only do harm to our body, mind, and spirit.  We take in the toxic poison as if it is our sustenance, thereby hurting us for years to come.

Avoidance brings us out of consciousness and awareness.  It puts us in the passenger seat instead of being in control of our life.  When we are out of control, the fear and panic and despair set in causing us further long term effects.

During these times of immense stress and toxic poisoning, we owe it to ourselves to reverse the course.  There are things we can do to help alleviate it and take care of ourselves, rather than just giving in to what is happening.

Here are some things that help in moments like this.

• Try spending some time outdoors listening to the birds and feeling the rays of the sun upon your face.  Try feeling the wind or breeze on your skin and just feel every bit of it that you can.  

• Trying focusing on your breathing for 30 seconds or a minute at various times during your day.  Connect and feel your breath.  This does not need to be elaborate and can be very simple. The act of stopping and noticing your breath can be very centering and be grounding in your body.

• Learn to disengage from the toxic conversations occurring online for they are not as helpful as they may seem.  They get the body and mind all revved up as if you are going into battle.  Online conversations do little but fuel the fire and hatred that is so prevalent in our society these days.  If you disengage, you are stating to yourself that you are valuable and worth more.

• Learn to shut off the TV because the news is not enlightening as you may think.  The videos and sounds and opinions stated are meant to engage you into an emotional reaction.  The more you keep your emotions wound up to the max, the less you are connected to your body.  In time, it leads to avoidance of your mind and body.

We all have choices we make.  We may or may not be conscious and aware of them, but we make these decisions every day.  Either we employ avoidance, or we stand up and choose differently what we engage with in a day and all that we take in with each moment we are alive.

You don't' have to hide your head in the sand to what is going on, but a fraction of the toxic poisoning these days is more than enough.  It may help to picture yourself drinking a glass of toxic poisoning each time you engage with what is going on in the world.  However, before long the effects of the poisoning would be felt.

If we want to change the world, we need to stop avoiding life and learn how to give our mind and body a choice of rest and peace, comfort, and love.  We need to choose wisely because if we don't, we will pass the point of no return, and then it will be difficult to find our balance.

What are some ways you avoid difficult things in life?  What do you do to deal with them?  Share your thoughts in a comment below.

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Blog Post And Images (c) 2017 by Don Shetterly

• Permission required before any part of this blog post is reprinted, reworded or used in any form. 
• You are welcomed to share the LINK to this blog post.  

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Pain Opened My Eyes

Written By Don Shetterly

Here are my observations about my experiences right now, and I'm recording them to help myself not to forget as well as hopefully help others by sharing what I've been through.  This is not an easy experience dealing with dental pain, but I am trying to learn as much as I can as I go through it on my open.  The pain is opening my eyes.


While I know that pain will get your attention and will increase until it does, sometimes I know we (and this includes myself) numb and disconnect from it so much that it takes a baseball bat to wake us up.  I know that, and I'm sure most people do, but somehow we still numb and disconnect from the pain.

I've realized that the dental pain I'm dealing with is something I've been living with for some time now.  I've altered so many things unconsciously just to deal with the pain and numb it.  In fact, I didn't realize I had even done this.

For example, when eating, I have learned to eat on the side of my mouth to avoid the pain.  Another example is we have learned to eat things I can eat, so I didn't have to experience the pain.  I've learned to just live with it because the fear of dealing with the pain was so great that I just numbed my conscious thought to it.

That's the thing we humans do.  We numb and disconnect our conscious thought and awareness to the pain.  We do it without realizing that we do.  We do it automatically.  As much healing work as I've done on my mind and body with respect to trauma, I still do this.  It is an unconscious behavior.

Pain is there, and even if we feel some pain in our body, our unconscious behavior can minimize it or alter how we see it.  It can keep us from truly seeing all aspects of it.  More importantly, it prevents us from seeing beyond it and framing our mindset and perspective about the bigger picture in life in a way that opens up to possibility not restricts us from being more than we are.

As I write this, I feel like

• Pain is exhausting.
• Pain takes over my life. 
• It feels heavy.
• It prevents me from seeing things in clearness and reality.
• Often I don't completely know it is there.
• Often I disconnect from it.
• Pain increased to the point of getting my attention.
• I sometimes close my eyes to the pain.
• I numb myself to the pain without being aware of it
• I find ways to disconnect from the pain automatically.

One thing the dentist said that was like a big ah-ha moment for me was that "I deserved to live a life without this pain." While that may be one of those statements that sound so simple, it was anything but that to me.  I sometimes see the wounded part of my life that doesn't deserve to live a life differently than the trauma and abuse that was done to me.

I record these things as part of my own processing of the events that are unfolding.  It is my way of making sense of all that is happening in my life at this moment.

As I go through this process and learn more about my life, I realize that all this time I've been trying to numb and disconnect from it, that it was taking far more energy than if I would have just got it treated.

Yes, I know it is easier to write those words than to put them into practice, but I can't help but think, "I should have taken care of this a couple of years ago because it might not have been as bad."  Hopefully I've learned from this and my intent is to not let myself forget the ways that pain has opened my eyes.

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Blog Post And Images (c) 2017 by Don Shetterly

• Permission required before any part of this blog post is reprinted, reworded or used in any form. 
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Feel Your Body

  Written by Don Shetterly

Okay, the title of that blog post might be raising a few eyebrows and if it is, I'm okay with that.  There is nothing wrong with the statement, and I'm not trying to dupe you into something that is not.  Trust me, the statement "feel your body" is pure, and it is helpful.


Most of us humans go through life not feeling our bodies.  Yes, we think we do, and that we are in touch with it.  Unfortunately, we are very good at fooling ourselves far too often.  I know, no one wants to hear that, but it is true.

There are reasons why we don't completely feel our bodies.  I don't want anyone to be too hard on themselves for not feeling their body because, in many ways, this is part of being human and aware.

Some of the reasons that we do not feel our body include the following:

1. Past experiences.
2. Stress in our lives (whether we create it or it is around us).
3. Physical issues we are struggling with.
4. Diet.
5. The level of exercise and activity.
6. How we learned to deal with stress in life.
7. Trauma.
8. Abuse
9. Rape
10. Childhood Sexual Abuse.
11. Unconsciousness.
12. Numbness.
13. Keeping ourselves busy all the time.
14. Not taking the time to feel.
15. Being afraid to feel.
16. Dealing with an overwhelming life.
17. Dealing with chronic pain.
18. How we connect with the world around us.
19. Immersed in the latest news and issues of the day.
20. Avoidance

These are some of the reasons why we do not feel in our bodies.  With some of these, it is easy to look at and understand.  With some of the other reasons, it may be harder to understand.

When I was working a nonstop schedule of weekly travel and handling 400 to 600 emails a day. plus being the lead tech support person for a project, I found myself feeling almost no pain.  However, even though I didn't feel it, the pain was taking its toll on me through exhaustion.

It was when I finally stopped for a moment that the pain caught up with me, and it was not pretty.  I had suppressed it so much that I didn't feel it.

I'm amazed at what our bodies do to us and for us when we are oblivious to reality.  I saw this play out when Conversion Disorder paralyzed me.  I have observed it play out in other people and at other times in my life.

Recently, I went through some major healing work because anxiety, depression, despair, and pain were getting to be too much for me.  I could hardly go on in life.  I did not realize how painful my hamstring area was until I got in that session and allowed myself to feel.  Of course, the muscles were exhibiting the reactions to trauma from years past, but I was completely oblivious to it.

I see people talk about stress being all in our heads, but that could not be farther from the truth.  Stress is everywhere.  Yes, some don't feel it consciously, but it is there.  Stress impacts us every day, and if we hide from it and ignore it, then it will build up.  As stress continues to build, it will get our attention at some point in life.

If you're going through chronic pain and other conditions, you may be feeling pain but there is so much other stuff that has been blocked. It pushes the limits of pain to levels that are extremely difficult to endure.  It is as if one side of life has been pushed to the max while another side of life has been forgotten and numbed.

Feeling your body can be scary and frightening.  We have plenty of medications and drugs out there to prove this.  There are enough wine, alcohol and OTC pain relievers so help us disconnect and numb from what is going on.

Sometimes past experiences impact us more than we realize, and they start suppressing one side of our body systems while elevating other parts.  The more this happens, the more the fear increases and when it gets to be too much, we are shutting down our connection to what is going on in our bodies.

It is natural for humans to do this.  It is part of our survival mode, but unfortunate the survival mode doesn't get turned off after stress or experiences or past abuse and trauma.  Our brain then gets hijacked by all that happened to us or all that we experience, leaving us as puppets, rather than in control of our lives.

The more we can stop and recognize all of this, the greater the chance we have to overcome so much.  Experiences in life, stress, and trauma that we have endured suppress the healing power we have within us.

Just recognizing this in the mind is not enough.  It is only part of the equation.  We need to go in and feel our bodies.  We need to go in and feel every fiber of every muscle and each cell of every tissue.  It is through that connection to the body that we give ourselves the greatest hope of being more than we are.

The more we feel in the body, the more we can enact change and make better choices for our lives.  If we don't do this, the stress and trauma will take over and leave us as bystanders in our own life.  We have the option to connect more than we do and if we do this, the payoff is far beyond anything you most likely can comprehend in this moment.

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Blog Post And Images (c) 2017 by Don Shetterly

• Permission required before any part of this blog post is reprinted, reworded or used in any form. 
• You are welcomed to share the LINK to this blog post.  

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What Does Mindful Mean?

I see many things discussed about this every day, and while some hit the mark, others miss it, and some do a drive-by.  Mindful has become a buzzword these days, and while some of that is good, there's a lot that is not helpful at the end of the day.

So I'll give you my take on it, and I'm sure some will disagree.  However, what I write will be from my own experience, and what I have learned in the healing work I've been a part of over the past decade.

What Does Mindful Mean?

First off, it has to do with the mind.

Second, in my view, it is a connection between the mind and the body.  This is probably the point in which I differ with many, but again, I am speaking from my own experience and knowledge.

Too often as humans, we live in our head.  Yes, physically we are attached to our bodies, but we are so disconnected from anything we feel there.  No, I'm not referring to the pain that you feel, but an overall sense of being disconnected.

Most of the time we go through our days not fully feeling what is going on in our bodies. We don't stop to check in.  We don't notice how shallow and ineffective our breathing is.  We don't stop to see how stress and tension are affecting our bodies.

We just go through our days as if it is one task to the next, oblivious to what the body feels.  Yes, we need to do this to function and get our tasks done, but we often forget to stop, step back, and slow down or rest.  We think that's only for a yearly vacation, a weekend, or when we sleep at night.

So, while we focus on the mind part of mindful, we usually blow right past the body part.  The body part is where most of it happens.  Check out more on the Enteric Brain to get a better sense of that.

While it is nice to take a walk in the park and notice all that is around us, or to see something we normally don't see in a day, mindfulness is more than that.  It is about seeing and feeling all of these things from deep within your body so that it resonates outward and upward to your mind.

Mindfulness is about finding peace through awareness of all parts of the body, not just what thoughts we derive and create in our mind.  You can reach a level of peaceful contentment in your mind with your thoughts, which can be very helpful, but without the body you're only embracing half of mindfulness.

With feeling more in your body and getting in touch with those deep corners and recesses within you, you'll find that there is more to the mind body connection.  The more you embrace this and feel it and sense it, the more mindful you will become.  You will enhance your overall experience.

While experiences in life, stressors, and other situations keep us in our heads and out of our bodies, it should be our goal to be more in touch with the physical sensations lying beneath the surface.  We don't have to ignore and disconnect from them.  We can experience them and in turn, bring more fulfillment and mindfulness to our lives.

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Blog Post And Images (c) 2017 by Don Shetterly

• Permission required before any part of this blog post is reprinted, reworded or used in any form. 
• You are welcomed to share the LINK to this blog post.  

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Traumatized By Seizures

One of the things I experienced in 1991 was a condition called Conversion Disorder.  Many people see it in different ways, and there are many who do not understand this condition.  In a nutshell, it is like an overloaded circuit in the body that tends to flip the breaker and shut you down.  That is how I've come to understand it in my own healing and life.

Pseudo-seizures in Conversion Disorder are part of what I experienced after I lost control of my body through paralysis.  In those early moments, I could not walk or stand and function on my own.  Eating, talking, moving, and many other actions we take for granted were gone from me in the blink of an eye.

However, the seizures I went through was by far the worst.  I did not understand what was happening to me.  They would go on forever, it seemed.  My parents would watch me in the wheelchair I was sitting in as the seizures kicked in.  They would be frightened, and so would I.  The only thing that stopped the seizures was when my body got completely exhausted.

In these seizures (that's what I call them), my body would tremble and shake.  It felt like my arms and legs would move violently all over the place with absolutely no control.  It didn't feel as though I was present in the moment of what was happening, and it always felt like there was nothing I could do.

I was so frightened during these times.  I wanted so badly for someone to come and put their arm around me and hold me.  I didn't want people to stare at me as if I was some freak because they were afraid themselves.  If anyone talked to me or put a hand on me, I don't remember that.  I don't think that happened.

While I was in a healing session the other day, this is the subject that came up.  It took me by complete surprise because I had not even thought about it.  I sure didn't think I had been traumatized by the seizures.  However, I found out just how much is still locked up in my body from these seizures.

In the work I have gone through called Unified Therapy with Dr. Paul Canali, shaking and trembling are often part of the healing session.  It is normal for our bodies to shake and tremble to dissipate stress or trauma.  However, most of the time the mind and body stop this.  So if we allow ourselves into these healing moments, they can release so much locked energy within our cells, tissues, and our mind body.

It is important to make a note here that just shaking and trembling by themselves are not the healing part.  When you connect it to an emotion coming up in the body or some experience you've been through that automatically appears, then you have the basis for a very powerful healing moment.  If you're not careful though, you can get locked into this trembling and shaking and have it yield nothing more than re-traumatizing yourself or a person you are working with.

As the session went along, all of this came front and center and something that was actually healing and helpful was frightening to me.  Dr. Canali is able to understand this and work with me so that I don't go into the overwhelm moment.   I go up to the edge of it, where I am instead empowered.  While this may all sound like too much and too scary to go through in a session, he is careful not to re-traumatize you.  The more you can go into these moments, the more healing and awareness comes out as a result.  It becomes empowering to aid you in further healing and growth.

It did not dawn on me until this session that I was storing so much trauma in my body and my mind from the seizures.  I just thought that once they were done, it was all over and I had moved on.  As I keep gathering the fragmented pieces together of what I went through, I begin to see a new picture of who I am.

All too often, we think that once things are over we are past them and we've moved on.  In fact, we often tell ourselves and others that we have moved on, or that they should move on.  It isn't until we allow ourselves to connect all of these things together that we truly are in the healing part of the mind body connection.

This is what healing and awareness are all about, but it all depends on how far I'm willing to let myself go into these moments.  If I hold myself back, they will not happen.  If I let go and surrender to them, the other side of peace and joy that I gain is beyond any words I can use to describe it.  If I do not integrate them in and acknowledge their presence in my life, I will continue to wander through life as if it is another foggy day.

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Blog Post And Images (c) 2017 by Don Shetterly

• Permission required before any part of this blog post is reprinted, reworded or used in any form. 
• You are welcomed to share the LINK to this blog post.  

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Fear On Autopilot

I see this subject talked about online so much, but yet few too many people fully understand it.  Even,  I consider myself a life long learner when it comes to the subject of fear.  Yet, there is so much more I need to learn to fully understand fear.

We are on autopilot more than we realize with fear.

Fear is insidious.

Fear is clever and crafty.

Fear hides from our awareness and view. 

We may think we see fear and we may connect with some of our fears, but far too much of it goes hidden from our view.  It keeps us blind to that which we cannot see and it keeps us numb and disconnected.

So if fear is on autopilot in our lives, how do we notice it?  How do we go in and deal with it?  How do we become aware of it?

For if you're not aware of something, it is pretty difficult to work on it.  If you're not aware of its existence in your life, why would you even be concerned?

Through much of the deep trauma healing work I've done with Dr. Paul Canali, we've come up on the fear that I often don't realize is there.  It is just too easy to miss it and often like I said, "fear keeps us blind".  Yet, fear controls so much of our lives.

One of the first things we do on the table in a Unified Therapy healing session with Dr. Canali is we are asked to "sense what is going on in our body".  Now, that may sound stupid and simple, but believe me, most of the time we as humans walk our days not fully sensing and feeling - even if we think we do.

When you stop and start to allow your mind to sense, you see so much that you didn't see moments earlier.  Generally, fear will be the next thing you sense, because it wants you to keep your eyes closed to the deeper truths of your life and your own awareness and consciousness.

When you come up on that fear you start to connect with, it almost feels like a gigantic mountain that you can't move.  If you can go into that fear, then you begin to take back its power and see just how much it is physically robbing from you.  Often times, it means doing this with a trusted healer, friend, or therapist that knows how to walk through the fires with you.

If you allow yourself to go through this process of feeling and sensing which leads to discovery, you'll be more amazed at just how much fear takes your life on autopilot without you knowing it is there.  Remember, fear is insidious.  It keeps us blind to that which would take its power away.

The thing is, this is not just a mental exercise.  Yes, you can attempt to program your mind to numb and disconnect from fear, but it only burrows deeper within your mind and body.  It is only when you go in and look at it face to face that you begin the process of reclaiming the power it has stolen from you.

I don't write these things as a mental concept that is unproven.  I write them from my own experiences of healing from trauma.  We are just so alseep in this world and not aware of as much as we think we are.

We have our fears being on autopilot to thank for that.  However, if we choose too, we can go in and take our life back.  It just begins with stopping to sense and feel in our body.

But come here fear.... 

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Blog Post And Images (c) 2017 by Don Shetterly

• Permission required before any part of this blog post is reprinted, reworded or used in any form. 
• You are welcomed to share the LINK to this blog post.  

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The Fear Poem

This is one of my favorite poems on FEAR, and it has helped me heal my life in many ways.  I am sharing the CD version with you in the hope that it will have as great an impact on your life as it has on mine.

Here is Joy Harjo performing her "Fear Poem"

Fear is a part of our human existence, but it is how we interact with that fear that either makes it debilitating or empowering.  It is not a simple process and should not be used as chastisement because you're still learning to see fear for what it is.  It is a lifelong process of awareness and consciousness, not something to hit ourselves over the head with in our healing.

All too often we act as if we should not have fear, but the fear is there for a reason.  If we allow it to show us what that reason is, we will gain so much in our life and in our healing.

For more, take a look at another blog post I wrote called "Don't Run From Your Fears".

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Blog Post And Images (c) 2017 by Don Shetterly

• Permission required before any part of this blog post is reprinted, reworded or used in any form. 
• You are welcomed to share the LINK to this blog post.  

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Asleep and Numb by Happy Thoughts

At one time in my life, everyone thought I had it all together.  I learned from my Mom, who always put the happy smile on in life.  Even if she was sick as could be, she would not let anyone know it.  I did the same.

I constantly immersed myself with happy thoughts and portrayed a "false reality" to the world.  My friends just thought I had it all together and were shocked when I ended up in the hospital with Conversion Disorder.  I still remember them pointing this out to me.

There is nothing wrong with happy thoughts or inspirational messages.  We all need them and they can lift us up sometimes.  Affirmations can help us focus.  However, they should not take over for the reality we project to the world.  Unfortunately that happens all the time in our lives, and especially on social media.

In this example from the blog post on June 13, 2017, Mirabel does what I used to do.  So she only shows the happy smile and shares the happy thought online, avoiding anything and everything that is hard for her to deal with in her life.  Unfortunately Mirabel doesn't realize just how asleep she is.

No, not everyone wants to see our doom and gloom.  Yet if we show the real side of our lives, others can more readily connect with us.  They can learn from us and often help provide support for us.  Together, we can do much more when we are real, not when we are fake.

I constantly see people putting down and belittling others for not being 100% positive all the time, and I weep for them.  That is not being human.  That is being unreal and disconnected and asleep.  It is numbing yourself to what your life is.  There is no way to move forward if you are numb.

Show the happy smile, but also show how you're climbing up out of the depths of despair.  Show the happy smile, but be real and authentic with people.  No one enjoys being around someone that lies to them or paints an inaccurate picture.

Yes, it takes courage to not just be numb and asleep when it comes to how we feel and what is going on in life.  It takes vulnerability, like what Brene Brown talks about.  Through moments of being real, we often lift ourselves and others up to a stronger and more powerful vantage point.

The world needs real people.  The world does not need fake pasted on smiles.  There is far too much of that on our planet today that is taking us over the cliff.  May we awaken from our sleep and realize this before we've gone past the point of no return.

Make sure you check out the first part in this 11 part series

 Part 1 is "Are You Asleep"

 

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Blog Post And Images (c) 2017 by Don Shetterly

• Permission required before any part of this blog post is reprinted, reworded or used in any form. 
• You are welcomed to share the LINK to this blog post.  

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Asleep To Feeling Pain In Our Body

Let's all go down to the river and party the night away.  Okay, I'm not sure why I wrote that this, but maybe it is more telling then I am aware of in this moment.  If you read the blog post on June 13, 2017, Are You Asleep?, you will see that Donnie struggles with this one.

Here's a part from Donnie's statement on the blog post Are You Asleep:     After all, he doesn't have time to deal with pains in his body.  There is just too much too accomplish.   His body is 100% pain free.  Unfortunately, that's a good sign of how asleep Donnie is.

We are so oblivious to pain in our bodies that even saying we are asleep is not a strong enough statement.  Of course, I'm sure you're probably eye-rolling me right now, wondering if I just fell off my rocker and hit my head on the floor.

Safe to say, I'm okay.  I didn't hit my head on the floor.

For a long time I was traveling every week and going almost nonstop.  I hardly felt pain in my body.  There was no time to feel it and if I felt it, it had to disappear because I could not function and do what was required of me.  Pain relievers were the go-to if that happened.

However, most of the time I didn't feel pain.  In fact, that's how most of us are.  We are oblivious to pain in our bodies, even though it is there.  Yes, even if you don't notice it, it is there.

How do I know this?  Well, when I finally get myself to stop or I go in for a deep healing session with Dr. Paul Canali, the first thing I'm asked to do is feel what is going on in my body.  Of course, one thinks that we know what is going on, but until you do this - much of it is hidden.  Let me repeat that - much of it is hidden.

The more you stop and notice, the more you'll exclaim like I do in a session, "Oh, I didn't know that was there."  We are so unconscious and disconnected that most of the time the pain (and the warning signs of the mind and body) go undetected.  We just fail to hear them because we are asleep.

They keep ratcheting up the alarm, and we keep dousing them with unconsciousness and other substances in our day.   Then when the alarm has gone as far as it can, the body gets our attention.  Usually by that point, things aren't good and require much more medical intervention than we would have had to do if we'd listened to the pain in the first place.

I had someone once tell me that they were sorry to hear I had pain.  I'm like, but everyone does - they just don't listen to it.  It is messages our bodies are trying to get through our asleep thick skulls.

Pain can be good if we do something conscious with it.  If we hide it, then we've inflicted a world of hurt on ourselves.  Rather than hiding it, the better thing to do is to go in and feel the pain.  Yep, I know - you've probably thought I've fallen again from my rocking chair.  Rest assured, I have not.

If pain is overwhelming, we want it gone.  That's human nature.  However, if you can find body work like what Dr. Paul Canali does, then you learn that by going into the pain,  you take control of it and transform it.  When you do, a whole new world opens up.

Is that easy?  NO IT IS NOT!  Is it good in the long run? YES IT IS.  Being asleep so much that you don't feel the pain is not a recipe for health and wellness.  Too much in our society is built around numbing the pain, rather than going in and interacting with the pain.  Too many health conditions are a result of not feeling the pain.

It is past time our world wakes up and begins to deal with pain in the right way.  First, we have to recognize it is there and feel it.  Once we've made it that far, then we need to go in and have a conversation with it through not only the mind, but through the felt sense of the body.  When we learn to interact with it in the body, that's when pain becomes our friend, rather than our foe. 

Make sure you check out the next part in this 11 part series

 Part 11 is "Asleep By Happy Thoughts"

 

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Blog Post And Images (c) 2017 by Don Shetterly

• Permission required before any part of this blog post is reprinted, reworded or used in any form. 
• You are welcomed to share the LINK to this blog post.  

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Asleep By SmartPhones

This one is getting to be an epidemic.  Our smartphones can be so helpful, but they can also keep us so disconnected and asleep. It is getting sad these days, as I look around and no one is paying attention to anything but their smartphones.

In the example posted on the blog post, Are You Asleep, there are some issues with Sally and her smartphone.  She can go to her happy and safe place with her phone.  Yes, it is disconnecting from everyone, but hey she is still there present with them, although asleep. 

Yes, we can probably chime in and say, "Oh I hate it - everyone is on their smartphones these days but not paying attention".  Yet,... and this is a big YET, we fail to see we are doing the same thing.  We're too asleep to notice.  We're too disconnected to notice what we do.

It is easy to point the finger at others, but with the majority of people doing it, we might need to realize that three fingers are pointing back at ourselves.  It isn't just others that do this!  That's the point I'm trying to make.

Smartphones can be good.  I love them.  I love what I can do on them, but sometimes (myself included), we let them control our lives.  If you don't think you do, try shutting it off for 24 hours and putting it away.  Let me know how that is going after an hour or two.

We connect to so many people online, but in many ways we don't connect with anyone.  We just stay behind a screen of likes, favorites, shares and forwards.  We just don't engage with others in a humanistic way.  We are asleep and disconnected and numb for the most part.

If we could limit ourselves and find balance, it would be helpful to the mind and body.  It would make us all more human, rather than these high strung opinionated people we are becoming.

Humans require physical communication with one another, I believe.  I'm not sure I believe that smartphones rise to that level. In the long run, they are hurting us.  They are hurting us because we have lost our balance, and grown asleep in our lives.

Make sure you check out the next part in this 11 part series

 Part 10 is "Feeling Pain In The Body"

 

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Blog Post And Images (c) 2017 by Don Shetterly

• Permission required before any part of this blog post is reprinted, reworded or used in any form. 
• You are welcomed to share the LINK to this blog post.  

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Truth Or Disconnect

We face ourselves in truth or in disconnect.

Constantly Connected To The Job

I did this one for a long time and it almost cost me my life and the world that I knew.  I didn't realize how having to be constantly connected to the job was killing me.  It was keeping me asleep.

The example of Frank from the blog post Are You Asleep could have been me in many ways.  Read an excerpt here from that blog post:

Yes, his employer forces him to take at least one week a year away from the office, but he's constantly checking email and working on projects.  He doesn't realize he is asleep.  (read the full example)

In my job I worked from home, but the employers and people above me did not care if I had time to myself.  They would claim up and down, all day long, that I should only work 40 hours a week.  They had to say that because otherwise they were breaking the law in how they had us report time.

Of course, in the next breath you would get chastised if you could not keep up with 150 to 200 calls a day among 400-600 emails and conference calls, traveling, and training techs.  These were just some of the pieces of the job.  They balked at giving you help, but thought that you could accomplish everything in 40 hours.  The support calls came all hours of the day and night because they didn't know how to schedule any of the project, and they didn't know how to hire the right people to do the job.

I got to a point where I could not function and life was nothing but an annoyance.  There was no time off.  The project had to continue, unorganized as it was, while the main company made millions.  They sacrificed my life for millions of dollars.

Yet I was so busy at the time that I didn't even realize what was being done to me.   I got to the point, medically, where I had to take time off -- and they still called me.  There was no escaping it.  A few months later, I said enough was enough.

The funny part is, there was much of the job that I loved, but they had worked me to death. I say shame on employers that do this to people.  If you can't respect your workers and their lives, you don't deserve to be in business.

This is so commonplace, but it is a practice of being asleep and unconscious and numb.  Sure, it is your job and livelihood, but it comes with serious costs.  There is nothing that is worth giving up your life - no amount of money or time.

NO, it isn't easy trying to get out of this or even realizing you have options.  We get sucked into it because we think if we work hard, we'll get ahead.  Yet, the end point of the working hard to get ahead game never ends.  It just requires more and more out of us.

At some point, you have to wake up or hope you do before it is too late.  Working in this way and constantly being connected to your job is not living.  It is not human.  It is being controlled and manipulated by those whose only existence is for the power of greed.

Make sure you check out the next part in this 11 part series

 Part 9 is "Asleep By SmartPhones"

 

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Blog Post And Images (c) 2017 by Don Shetterly

• Permission required before any part of this blog post is reprinted, reworded or used in any form. 
• You are welcomed to share the LINK to this blog post.  

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Asleep To What We Put In Our Body

This is yet another example from the blog post of June 13, 2017.  In this example Amy Lou is asleep when it comes to her mind and body,and what she pours into her body.

It is one of the most common examples of being asleep that I think there is.  Most people do not even realize they do this and even if they did, they have no clue how to get out of it.  Diet programs and practices rarely help because people are not as conscious as they want you to believe.

Here is an excerpt from the blog post, Are You Asleep about Amy Lou.  Yes, she is health conscious because she drinks her diet sodas and consumes the low fat snacks and food as stated on the packaging of the food item.  Her body reacts with headaches and fatigue, but she blames this on stress and age, not on being asleep.

For a long time, I thought drinking soda was just as good as drinking anything else.  It was liquid and I knew my body needed liquid, so why did I need anything else?  I'd drink an occasional glass of water or some iced tea that had water in it, and thought everything was fine.  I didn't realize that I was just fooling myself.

Our bodies are made up of around 70% water, and yet we deprive it of one of the most basic things it needs.  All these other forms of liquids just don't do what our body needs.  It has to process and try to pull out useful water from what we consume.  This requires much more work and is often not very effective.

Drinking water is one of the best things you can do for your body.  It is mainly what I drink now, but it took me some time to make the shift.  If I don't drink enough water in a day, not only do headaches show up, but I feel the fatigue and fog in the brain.

Another part of being asleep in what we do to our body is the food we put in it.  Far too much processed food is consumed as being "nutritious" when really it is not.  We fail to put whole foods into our bodies, instead hijacking with sugar and processed stuff that has little value.  I'm sorry if the food industry does not like that statement, but if you want to be healthy - increase whole foods you consume, not frozen and packaged and processed stuff.

Another asleep behavior is not reading the contents of what you buy.  If you do read labels, you are ahead of the curve, but you have to read every label.  I swear, they sneak stuff in all the time that makes me scratch my head.  Why we are obliterating our food, I'll never understand.  It is being asleep at the highest levels.  I'm not even talking about GMO's here.  This is more than just GMO.

You've most likely heard that what we put in us is what we get out.  Yet, we shove the unhealthiest junk into our bodies and then wonder why they can't keep up.  We've heard it a million times, but we discount and neglect it as something we should tell others, but not practice ourselves.

Even though I try hard not to be asleep, I still fail on this one too.  Yes, I do the smoothies every morning packed full of phytochemicals from whole foods.  That helps, but I still need to be aware and conscious of what I eat, and make sure whole live food is a major part of my day.

Make sure you check out the next part in this 11 part series

 Part 8 is "Constantly Connected To The Job"

 

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Blog Post And Images (c) 2017 by Don Shetterly

• Permission required before any part of this blog post is reprinted, reworded or used in any form. 
• You are welcomed to share the LINK to this blog post.  

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Asleep With Pain And Difficulty

While this one may sound strange, Mortimer's issues in life are more than what meets the eye.  If you read the blog post with Mortimer's example, you will see just how asleep he is.

Here is a snippet of how Mortimer isn't present, even though he thinks he is.  It is an insidious struggle that works from the inside out in our mind and body.  It is the ego in control, not consciousness.

Mortimer thinks that life is just about pain and difficulty.  He knows that the doctor knows best and so he doesn't question if there is anything different he needs to do in his life. (see the full example of Mortimer)

For some reason when it comes to our health, we tend to disengage the brain that is inside our head.  I don't know how else to say that, but we all do it.  I've done it.  I've seen many do it.  I see many do it every day.  It is human behavior.

Like Mortimer, it is where we stop.  We don't go beyond it.  We don't go into it.  We often think that this is how things work and so we just accept that as fact.  Many times we are not taught anything different than what everyone practices.

Yes, our society and family units have taught us that anything that hurts or doesn't feel good is something that has to be fixed by someone else.  We're taught that in many ways.  We are often taught it at an early age when Mommy kisses our boo boo to make it better.

There's nothing wrong with going to get help.  In fact, we often need to do that whether it is medical attention or counseling services.  Too many times, we wait until things get really bad before we seek help.

The thing is, we just stop at that step.  We fail to go in and see what is causing our issues and find a way through them.  We fail to see how we need to change things in life.  We often fail to realize the role we play in making ourselves sick.

Yes, I know that not everything is something we did it to ourselves, but there is a vast majority of issues that could be greatly enhanced if we took our own blinders off.   We often put ourselves in moments of illness and distress that we don't need to, while we stay asleep in the process.

Some of us have endured many difficult moments in our past and as a result, we're forced to deal with issues that are so overwhelming.  I get that.  I've been there.  Some days I am still there.  However, there is so much we can do to impact our health and well being that many times we just don't do.

We can choose to stay asleep or we can destroy every paradigm we have about health and healing, to find something that works better for us.  We don't have to wait for a doctor or other health person to tell us to take something to numb us.  We can engage directly and learn more about our own mind and body.

The more you learn and the more you know, the more you can interact with your own health and healing.  Things that I would have claimed were impossible a few years ago are now things that I have seen change, and have healed in my own life and that of others.  I would not have guessed it then.  I would not have believed it then.

I try to keep an open mind to ways I can interact with my own awareness and consciousness.  Learning to recognize that there are other ways to improve my health and make life more than pain and difficulty has been eye opening to me.  It has awakened me from my sleep in life.

Is it easy to do this?  Not really!  Not in my view.  Yes, I can give lip service to it.  Yes, I can talk the talk of healing, but going in and doing it requires much more connection not only to my mind, but to my body.

After the Conversion Disorder paralysis I went through, I was bound and determined to find my way through it.  I didn't accept that this was the way things were or that this is the way they would be.  I pushed aside everything I thought I knew and began to open up to what I did not know.  In the end, it saved me.  In the beginning it was a life full of difficulty and pain.

Make sure you check out the next part in this 11 part series

 Part 7 is "What We Put In Our Body"

 

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Blog Post And Images (c) 2017 by Don Shetterly

• Permission required before any part of this blog post is reprinted, reworded or used in any form. 
• You are welcomed to share the LINK to this blog post.  

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