I'm Perplexed By People

By Don Shetterly

I'm perplexed by people.  So often, I hear people say they "care" or they "love" or they are "concerned" about you or someone else.  It all sounds heartfelt.  It feels like you could take those statements to the bank.

However, it doesn't take long before you start to see the cracks in the statements people make. You soon come to realize with much pain that the statements are nothing more than words.  There is no action to back them up.  There is no follow through.  They are just words that give the impression that people mean what they say.

I don't do this!

Of course, I'm sure most people would claim, I don't do this.  It is other people out there that do such things.  They make it convincible.  You want to believe them, but eventually, you learn that their words mean little.

It hurts when people do this because I try to take people at what they say.  I listen to them, and I try to believe that if they are saying they love me or care about me or are concerned, they mean it.  Yes, I know, it is easy to be fooled.

Meaningless Words

You can't just say these words and follow them up with inaction.  Speaking these phrases holds some responsibility.  Without truly showing that you care or love someone or are concerned, these words are meaningless.  They become weapons of pain inflicted upon others.

There are times that maybe it is best if you say nothing.  If you are not prepared to follow through, then don't throw your words around as if they have little value.  It cheapens you and the pain it inflicts upon others, cheapens them.

Don't be misled by the fact that you think everyone else does this because more than likely, you do not see yourself in a truth-filled way.  Yes, you might convince that you see things correctly, but it would serve humanity's best interest if you got a second opinion.

Let Us Be There For Others

After all, we are humans walking this earth plane together.  If we are truly there for others, it helps all of us.  If we inflict pain or stand opposed, we hurt the totality of humanity.  Let's be for helping others and truly being there for them, not only in our words but in our actions.

Mental Health Awareness is More Than A Tweet

Written By Don Shetterly

There are some things I'm so annoyed by online that I can't hardly bring myself to think calmly about them.  I keep seeing everyone tweet, like, and share online that we need to promote mental health awareness.

While that is great, this is where it seems to stop.  We don't go any further than a tweet.  We don't really jump into it.  We just tweet, retweet, share and like and feel like we are doing something.

Two times, I've put out real hard information and helpful events that were "free" but in both cases, people ignore it and move on to the next mind-numbing tweet of the day.   There is no sign up for the event.  There is no sharing of the event to help others.

All we do is sit back and like or retweet that we need to bring mental health awareness to the world.  Great - I'm for awareness, but if that is where it stops, then what are we doing?  Are we just puffing up our tweet ego for the day?

If I'm upsetting you, I'm not going to apologize because I see this over and over every day.  Helping others with mental health issues and suicide is much more than saying that's what you do.  People need real help, not words on a screen.

Yes, I know the subjects are difficult to deal with and everyone wants to hide their heads in the sand.  Yes, I know that there are many ways to help and some people do all they can.  However, the number of tweets about mental health awareness far outnumber the actual things people do to really help.

We need to get off of our proverbial social media butts and do something good, rather than just claiming mental health awareness.  When events come along, support them.  Don't just ignore them.  When people need help, be there for them, just don't give them platitudes.

Lastly, if all we do is scream at others for not understanding the pain we are in, then we're not helping them to learn.  We end up turning them away.  Share your story with them.  Share not only your pain and struggle but what is helping you and what you are learning.  Offer a hand of support to others, not a bat to beat them over the heads.

(click to read)

I cringe every time I see the mental health awareness tweets go through because there are far too many that stop at the water's edge.  People struggling with mental health and suicide need others physically to be there for them.  Words on a page do very little.  Thoughts and prayers are empty if no action follows.

Ok, that's my soapbox.  If I have offended you, I'm not going to offer an apology right now.  I want people to be offended so they get up off their proverbial social media butts and do something.  If making someone upset that they aren't doing enough gets someone doing more than this blog post accomplished its purpose.

---

Blog Post And Images (c) 2/27/18 by Don Shetterly

• Permission required in writing before any part of this blog is reprinted, reworded, transmitted or used in any format. 
• Feel free to share the blog post LINK and a brief summary.  

---

Hate Disguised As Love

Hate disguised as love is still hate.

Far too many times in a day, I see people act and state they love and accept everyone.  However, their actions and social media postings do not back up what they say and do as proof.  We can say we love others, but when we portray the actions of hate out into the world, we're decimating our statements of love.  Love is more than just saying that you love others.  Love is truly showing it through our actions and our lives.  It becomes who we are, not what we preach we are.  Let us not preach love unless we are willing to show love through our actions from deep within our hearts.  Be authentic with your statements of love.  The world will notice.

Other #MindBodyThoughts

Do You Really Care?

I see this far too many times and all I can do is scratch my head in disbelief.  I see and hear people say, "I care" and yet their actions don't match their words.

So, do you really care?  Is it just words or do you follow through.  Sorry, for the bluntness and harshness of this subject, but I'm really trying to get everyone's attention.  I'm trying to really put this in everyone's face, because it happens far too often.  It happens to the ones that say, "Yes I care".

How many times have you seen people in a tragedy or death event tell others, "let me know if there is anything you need".  Most of the time, if someone needs something, the ones saying this have a million things to do.  It was a nice thing for them to say in the hour of need, but if words don't match the actions, why are you saying it?

How many times have you seen people say, "I am there for you" or "I support you" and yet, when the going gets tough, there is no one to be found.  Yes, there's a few people that will follow through, but to most it seems like it is a string of words, rather than something they really mean.

What about the times when people say "we care" and yet, they avoid you and hide every time you try to get in contact with them?  Do they really care?  Or is it just a feel good thought by them to placate themselves to go along about their lives and not give it anymore thought.

Maybe it is because we're too "busy" following the latest political rants or what is happening in the latest reality show.  Maybe it is because were too busy staying busy that we don't stop to take time out for those that supposedly matter in our lives.  Maybe it is because we have our own personal agenda and if someone doesn't fit those confines, we're not going to give them the time of day.

Heck, it could be because we're so busy at being overwhelmed by social media and the latest news gossip of the day, that nothing else matters.  We're so caught up in life that we don't have capacity for anything else.

I honestly struggle with this because I see people make "supportive comments", but yet they treat the person as if they don't exist.  They treat them as if they are a bother, rather than someone that they care about.  It might be unintentional, but we really need to wake up.  We're hurting one another badly with this practice.

Let's make our words count.  Let's make our actions match our words.  If we truly don't mean what we say, then let's not make it appear that we do.

Sometimes people are banking on what you say to them.  Sometimes, it is more than mere words in that moment.  There are times people really need for you to reach out to them, rather than just avoiding and acting as if they don't exist.  It may be their lifeline back to reality in that moment.

When we say things we don't mean, it holds our integrity suspect.  We become that clanging symbol in the world that just makes noise, but not much else.  Put your heart in action before you put your words in action and you'll help improve the world in ways you can't imagine.

---

Blog Post And Images (c) 2017 by Don Shetterly

• Permission required before any part of this blog post is reprinted, reworded or used in any form. 
• You are welcomed to share the LINK to this blog post.  

---

Preaching hate

I'm sorry if this makes some uncomfortable, but its the only way I can deal with the tragedy in Orlando.  I've had people stop following me on Twitter today because I talked about hate. I guess they don't like the fact that I'm gay.  I'm not going to apologize for this.  I am who I am and if anyone cannot accept me, it was nice meeting you.

I'm not sure how you can say the following statement and immediately watch scores of people unfollow.  I could think of all kinds of words to say about that action, but I won't step down into the depths of hatred and return the favor.  Take a look at what I said and see if that is a bad thing.  In my mind, it isn't.  Who knows, maybe people who hate are somehow more intelligent.  Maybe that's it.  I don't know.

You can't preach hate every day and expect a different outcome. Hate only breeds hate.

— Don Shetterly (@mindbodythought) June 12, 2016

Its sad.  We have hate that is fueled by the preaching of hatred across this land.  Whether it is in the church pulpit or the political arena, it seems we just like to hate.  We teach hatred as if it was a key in life.  All the time, we don't even know that we are so hateful to others.  Too many puff their chests up and act like somehow they are better and more superior.

In fact, most people that show their hatred are the ones that cry about how much of a victim they are.  They claim that if they can't spew and forth their hatred on to others at every turn in life, that somehow they are being victimized and silenced.  They don't stop to see just how their words, thoughts, and actions are some of the most hateful things that they produce.

Some out there think that if you don't believe in the way their religious teachings command, that you are stopping them from exercising their freedoms.  Nothing could be further from the truth, but to those that hate, truth is the last thing that fills the voids in their mind.

Not everyone believes the way you do.  It is called freedom of religion and freedom of speech.  However, when you push your beliefs upon everyone else, you've made the entire world less human.  You haven't helped the least among you and you sure don't exemplify the words of the Bible that you so vehemently claim you practice.  I'm often surprised at how these individual do not know what is in the Bible that they spout at every turn.

The more we spew the hatred and divisiveness to one another, the more we set people in our world to see that it is okay to hate others.  Even if we are not smart enough to know we are spewing hatred, it does not excuse our words, thoughts, and actions.  The more hate is preached, the more you cannot expect a different outcome.

See, we're more worried about what others do in this country and world than we are about what we do.  We are more worried about how others don't measure up in our judging eyes, than we are learning to accept others and celebrate our differences.

Preaching hate is the norm of our day.  It is sad that it happens with such frequency.  I'm saddened by what I see on social media, by the politicians and the churches, and those that spew the hatred.  The more this happens, the more violence we will continue to see.

(click image to read)
 

Its horrible.  I sat here today, crying tears of sadness and pain for those that lost loved ones in this senseless and horrible shooting in Orlando.  Of course, everyone reaches for the political one-liners to spew even more hate.

When will we learn?  When will we understand that it isn't everyone out in the world that is the problem, but ourselves and our heart?  When will we learn that it is our thoughts, actions, and words that we portray to the world which can either build us up or tear us down.  If you're doing these things, you are just as much a part of the problem as those that are blinded by the hatred in their hearts.

I'm sorry if this blog post sound harsh, but it is how I see things.  I'm tired of being silent as to not offend anyone.

---

Blog Post And Images (c) 2016 by Don Shetterly

• Permission required before any part of this blog post is reprinted, reworded or used in any form. 
• You are welcomed to share the LINK to this blog post.  

---

Actions Speak Louder

Growing up, I was in a home where there was no shortage of my father lecturing to you for hours.  He acted as if had all the right words and he didn't shy away from telling you what he thought or what you should do or how you should think.

I see the same with my brothers.  Maybe I do the same thing, I don't know but I would like to think that I don't.  If I fail, it isn't because I have not tried to do things differently.  Especially when it comes to religion and issues of the day, my older brother will flat out tell you how wrong you are and how religious he is and how he knows best.

Actions speak louder than words.  Our actions, say much more than we will ever say in words.  Our actions precede us in our communications with others.  So even though you think that your words are correct and right and for all to hear, often your actions speak louder.

We can see this in the politics of our day.  We can see it in the comments that get posted on social media and on websites.  We can see this in almost every aspect of our day.  If we don't see it, then most likely we are living under a rock because it is there.

I am amused and saddened at how much the masses and the leaders of the masses speak as if they know all.  Their actions don't back up their words and in fact, their actions often say the complete opposite of what they are trying to get you to believe.

Too many times, the actions and words do match up to an individual that is not as enlightened as they think they are.  Just because they speak loudly or they seem to have a following, it does not mean they know what they are talking about.  It does not mean everyone has to follow them blindly as they all march to the cliff.

Words are great but they need to be backed up by your action.  If you say you love everyone, but talk down about certain groups, then you may want to re-evaluate what it means to love everyone.  If you say you have the answers, but it is nothing more than your beliefs and opinions, you may want to re-evaluate what truth and answers are.

All too often, those that spout and spew words in a manner that they expect everyone to follow is nothing short of following a clanging symbol.  It might get your attention, but it is not a complete orchestration of music.

Its time that we learn to listen more with one another and to learn how to respect one another more.  There is far too much yelling and screaming and pontificating going on in this world and in this country.

We don't help each other by screaming at one another and telling each other how wrong we are.  We help each other by listening and respecting and loving one another.  Of course, its not merely words that we say which shows this, but our words backed up with action that aligns for everyone's greater good in this world.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Blog Post And Images (c) 2016 by Don Shetterly

• Permission required before any part of this blog post is reprinted, reworded or used in any form. 
• You are welcomed to share the LINK to this blog post.  

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

031216

Seeing From A Different Perspective

When I was going through a recent upheaval in life, I thought it was the end of the world.  I wasn't sure how I would get through it.  It felt bigger than me.  It felt like it would never end and I would not make it.  We all have those difficult moments in life.

The surprising thing is, I did make it.  In fact, I'm making it very well now.  There is so much that is happening and doors are opening.  I'm seeing things in an entirely new way and meeting people that are anxious to help me.  It is a complete turnaround from what it was about 3 months ago.

Often we go through experiences and we think they are the worst thing that can happen.  Yet, when we get through them, they look different than they did when we were in the middle of them.  It not only shows us our resilience, but it proves that there is much more at play than what we can sometimes see.

A couple of events happened when I began to step out of this situation which caused me to take further action and make decisions I was not expecting.  As I did those, I had no idea how they would impact my days ahead.  Now I can see that it helped shove me out of the nest.  It pushed me into the direction that I am now going.

Do I still deal with the emotional toll this previous situation was taking on me?  Yes, I do.  However, I'm letting it go more and more and as I do, I'm learning so much more.  I'm seeing so many opportunities that I could not see.  I am impacting the lives of other people in ways I never thought would happen.

Sometimes we go through those difficult moments in life because they are meant for us to take action.  Sometimes we go through those moments because they help us learn.  Yes, I know that if you're in the middle of a horrible situation, you're probably thinking I am nuts.  I've been there.  I truly know how you feel.

Keep putting one foot in front of the other and you will get there.  Everything will work out and I believe it will work out in the way that it is supposed to be.  It might be tough to see it now, but when you get to the other side, take a moment to look back and see it from a different perspective.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Blog Post And Images (c) 12/15/15 by Don Shetterly

• Permission required before any part of this blog post is reprinted, reworded or used in any form. 
• You are welcomed to share the LINK to this blog post.  

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Can I Do This?

I like to be in control and feel in control of my life.  It isn't easy for me to feel like I am not.  So, when I do the things I am doing now from working on a client to giving a speech, I often wonder, can I do this?

Many people do this and I know I am not alone.  As humans, I think we never quite feel confident or at least many of us feel this way.  There are some I am sure that feel more confident, but I'm one that struggles with that part of life.

A person that I worked with and I, had a nice little saying.  Some times you have to fake it until you make it!  We were put in situations that usually were over our head and left us wondering what in the heck we should do about a situation.   It was the classic, can I do this situation.  We realized as well that no one else had the answers or the experience we did and so we knew that we had to use our best judgment in finding a solution.

Walking Forth With Courage

In my life, there are many things taking place.  I'm taking steps to create the life I want, not the life I thought I had to live.  It isn't always easy and sometimes the growing pains are immense.  However, I am now in the process of walking forth with courage.

So many times we say we want our life to change.  We want things to be different.  We want to get past the despair that we have.  Yet, we do very little to do that.  We hunker down from the mere suggestion or thought of fears looming over us.

You can consult every person out in the world or you can ask everyone you know what you should do.  You can wait for them to answer and then continue to keep asking the questions.  However, until you take action, you will still be in discovery phase.

Walking forth with courage is the way you'll discover your life and all that it holds.  Taking action will get your feet moving and your fingers tapping.  It doesn't start though, until you take action.

Take Some Action

All too often we want the benefit without the action.  We want the goods, without doing anything.  We want abundance without moving our butts off the chair.  I'm sorry if I blow anyone's bubble, but that's not how it quite works.

Yes, I know that things can come out of thin air.  I've seen that in my own life.  I've watched it happen in others.  It is possible and I don't mean to diminish that probability in this world.

The thing is, I often see people reciting mantras, affirmations or prayers as if they are standing at an ATM machine waiting for it to grant their wishes.  It is kind of sad, to be honest.

At times, I see people making a Christmas list of everything they want and expecting the universe or God or someone to hand it to them.  They think that if they wear certain colors or do certain things or wish for certain things, it will just show up.  They think that if they think positive enough, it will all be there.

What Do You Broadcast?

Every day, all day long we put out something to the world.  In our actions and words, we portray a message to the world around us.  Even through our thoughts and energy, we impact those close to us and those that are far away.  Yet, what do you broadcast?

It is easy to go through our day thinking that we are just operating alone or within a very narrow space.  However, if you read Dr. Joe Dispenza's book, Breaking The Habit Of Yourself or Lynne McTaggart's book, The Field, you will quickly see that this is anything but how we operate.

We impact our world, our life and the lives of those near and far in ways that we may not even consider.  The words we use, the thoughts we think and the actions we do all touch the lives of those around us.  They either do this in a positive or a negative way.

All you have to do is look at your life and see what you are attracting.  When you do this, it becomes a mirror to what you are sending out.  All too often, we want something else in life, but what we send out is what we will get back.  If you think about it for a moment, you will most likely see evidence of this in your own life.

Impact Of Body Connections

Have you ever taken a moment to see just how much effect one drop of water can have on a pool or lake or container of water? If you put a drop of water into a container of water or pool, you will see the ripple effect through the little waves it generates. You can also picture someone skipping a rock across a lake and just watch the ripples of the waves go out from where the rock hits the water.

If you keep watching the ripples of the waves, you will see how the waves go to the opposite shore or edge of the container and then bounce back. As they come back, if you create more ripples, those will bounce into the returning waves. You could go on and on playing with this concept and in fact, if you have a body of water close by, go out and play with it. Study it from all perspectives and see just how much impact one tiny little rock, touch to the water or water droplet has on the water body you are playing with.

As you will see, the water begins to carry a life of its own, deeper and deeper into that which we cannot see. We can tell that the surface effects are there, but so much of it we miss with our eye. The events are too subtle and quick for us to see it. In one video on YouTube, you can see just what happens to a drop of water. Check this video out from the Jan 19, 2010 blog post, A Drop Of Water.

In many ways, this is how we impact the body and others around us. One little touch, one little word or action can have significant impact far beyond that which we can see. It can generate a life all to its own in the body which then goes on to have a much greater impact.

Something said out of love, honesty or in a positive way will be different than something said out of hate, negativity or leading someone on. Imagine a touch of support rather than a swat on the backside of a child and how that impacts the body. What about actions that say you honor and respect someone rather than using them to further yourself or your ego along? What impacts would each of these moments have upon not only the person or body you connected with but all the others that this person connected with?

I'm not writing this to make anyone feel bad for anything they have done. That is not my intent. The reason I write this is to be aware of your actions, words and touch in how it impacts other people. What may seem benign to you, may in fact be a tidal wave to someone else. While you cannot always go around in life watching every little minuscule thing you do, you can be sensitive to others and loving when you realize that you have harmed someone.

All too often, we worry about our own ego and our pride which keeps us from connecting with others in the way that we should. We hurt others because of our own fears and insecurities while not being human enough to own up to these things. Our words, actions and touch can either be a staff of support or a sharp knife of hurt and pain inflicting wounds. It is all up to us and how we get in touch with our own ego and fears as to what we will send out to other people.

Just having the happy thought of sending out love is not enough. It can be a good first step but if you still go and hurt others through your words, actions and touch, than sending out love is not enough. It is like a clanging symbol instead of an act of love. All too often, the healing community and humanity in general fails to see this. Yet, each day of our existence, we hurt way too many in our path. Even though people act as if they have the highest intention possible for others, the body sees the authentic nature of the connection clearly and without distortion. Our body stores that as energy which will either move a person forward or become a moment of challenge that will need to be healed.

May we be more mindful of our actions, words and touch and may they be full of awareness. May we be more authentic with the words or rituals we do rather than just giving the false illusion of following regurgitated illusions. For as humans, we have the potential to evolve and grow in awareness if we allow ourselves to travel this path.

Further Reading:
1) A Drop Of Water



Blog Post & Images (c) 4/6/11 Don Shetterly - use by permission only
http://www.donshetterly.com

What Moves Us To Action

What moves us to action? Is it our fears, our longings, our passions or desires? Could it be that others are responsible for moving us to action. Maybe it is an event, a person or some place that we travel to, that prompts us to do something.

There are times that it is hard to explain but we know deep down inside of us, that it is something we must do. We feel it in ways that it is clearly evident to us. Often times, we feel as if we stand alone as we prepare to take action, all the time knowing, we must do this.

It is often scary and unknown. There is usually no road map or a detailed list to guide our way. Soemtimes, even the objective is unclear at the moment we start. For us to look forward, it can be unimaginable how far this path of action will lead us.

While it can be easy to feel discouraged by the fear and worry of the unknown, we must remember to stay in the moment of now. We may not see how individual and unconnected points fit together as they come by. It may be sometime before we can view how all parts of our life moments fit together into a beautiful story.

We should never cease to dream or fail to live our dreams. For through the dreams, we open ourselves up to all that is possible. By opening ourselves up, we find that which excites us. Honoring that which excites us, moves us to action. It is at that point, where we truly find our feet on our path.