Vulnerability Journey With Brene Brown

Well, as much as I love the idea of walking alone down a lonely street of dreams, the vulnerability journey is not the kind of journey we can make alone. We need support. We need folks who will let us try on new ways of being without judging us. We need a hand to pull us up off the ground when we get kicked down in the arena (and if we live a courageous life, that will happen).

Book:  Daring Greatly
Author:  Brene Brown
Page 53

Biggest Critic In Your Life

I love how real Brene Brown is.  When I see these lectures, I can't help but want to jump up on the stage with her and give her a big hug.  She is so real and down to earth and saying the things that I believe most of us need to hear.

In this latest video I found, she talks about "Why Your Critics Aren't The Ones That Count".  Oh boy, now that is a big topic with a lot of steam in the kettle.

One of the quotes that I so love that Brene Brown makes in this video is "If you are not in the arena getting your ass kicked, I don't want your feedback."

Another great quote in this video is "What would have happened if you would shown up?"

It really makes me think because I know I hold back in life for what others might think, say, or do.  I compare myself to others and do exactly as what she was talking about in her speech.  I see it as others are doing this, so what makes me special".

Brene Brown on Empathy

Oh I so love this.  So true.   The most healing moments of support I have had is when I knew the person was there for me and not there to just help me bypass what I was learning in life.

I could write so much on this, but I can't stand the "empty phrases".  I always feel like I've been kicked in the gut when I hear them.  She articulated this so well.  I so love Brene Brown.  One of my favorites.

YouTube Video:  Brene Brown On Empathy

Vulnerability Is Complicated

“I hate uncertainty. I hate not knowing. I can’t stand opening myself to getting hurt or being disappointed. It’s excruciating. Vulnerability is complicated. And it’s excruciating. Do you know what I mean?”

Book:  Daring Greatly by Brene Brown (pg 5)

Love Is Uncertain And Risky

Love is uncertain. It’s incredibly risky. And loving someone leaves us emotionally exposed. Yes, it’s scary and yes, we’re open to being hurt, but can you imagine your life without loving or being loved? - Daring Greatly by Brene Brown (Pg 34)

Vulnerability Is Weakness Myth

The perception that vulnerability is weakness is the most widely accepted myth about vulnerability and the most dangerous. When we spend our lives pushing away and protecting ourselves from feeling vulnerable or from being perceived as too emotional, we feel contempt when others are less capable or willing to mask feelings, suck it up, and soldier on. We’ve come to the point where, rather than respecting and appreciating the courage and daring behind vulnerability, we let our fear and discomfort become judgment and criticism. - Daring Greatly by Brene Brown (pg 33)

Fear, Disengagement And Courage

No matter where I went or with whom I was speaking, the core issues were the same: fear, disengagement, and yearning for more courage. - Daring Greatly by Brene Brown (pg 15)

Brene Brown on Wholehearted Living

Wholehearted living is about engaging in our lives from a place of worthiness. It means cultivating the courage, compassion, and connection to wake up in the morning and think, No matter what gets done and how much is left undone, I am enough. It’s going to bed at night thinking, Yes, I am imperfect and vulnerable and sometimes afraid, but that doesn’t change the truth that I am also brave and worthy of love and belonging. - Daring Greatly by Brene Brown

Healing Through Expressive Writing

“Since the mid-1980s an increasing number of studies have focused on the value of expressive writing as a way to bring about healing. The evidence is mounting that the act of writing about traumatic experience for as little as fifteen or twenty minutes a day for three or four days can produce measurable changes in physical and mental health. Emotional writing can also affect people’s sleep habits, work efficiency, and how they connect with others.”  - Daring Greatly by Brene Brown

Book Review: Daring Greatly - Brene Brown

I'm only partially into this book and I can barely put it down!  I saw the original TED talk on YouTube and that blew my mind away.  The book is basically adding to that!  Thanks Brene Brown for blowing my mind!  (and I say that in a good way).  Daring  Greatly was featured on OWN Super Soul Sunday a few weeks back and rightfully so!

Most likely there are people out there that are yawning and thinking that talking about vulnerability and shame are like the most boring subjects one could discuss.  Or perhaps like an example I just saw, they dismiss it because it hits too close to home.  It could be that others just don't see this as being worthy enough of their time to read.  I'd offer up in a very strong and forceful way that if you fall into these categories, you really need to read this book.

It is so down to earth and a very simple read.  It is written just as Brene Brown would give a lecture and tell a story.  There is not one part of it that is boring or just academic or one of those college texts you have to read when you're in school.  Most books like this, I can only read a little bit before my eyes are drifting off, but this one - it holds my attention.  In fact, Daring Greatly, holds my attention to the point I don't want to quit reading it.

Hard To Believe I'm Loved

I saw a tweet today by Brene Brown (@BreneBrown in regards to Super Soul Sunday with Oprah.  It was a simple tweet, but one that connected with me.  The tweet went like this:  "The most important things our children can hear: No matter what, you will always belong here."

The reason it resonates with me is I heard words similar to this growing up, but unfortunately they were just words.  There was no action to back them up.  My family doesn't feel like I belong with them and so, some days it feels like I"m all alone.  Yes, I did make a decision to completely cut the ties between us, but it was only after I found that I didn't belong in my family.

For too many children, the family says you don't belong and they are kicked out to the street.  It is heart wrenching when I hear about this happening. I'm sure most of these kids grew up in homes where they felt like they were welcomed and loved, but then the minute they became true to themselves, the family said "oh no you don't!".

Brene Brown On Vulnerability And Numbing Emotions

Brene Brown On Vulnerability
TED Conference

I really enjoyed this video of a speech given by Brene Brown.  The topic was on vulnerability and numbing our emotions.  It was given at a recent TED Conference.  Click this link to view the video.

Vulnerability is difficult for a lot of people because to be seen as vulnerable in our society, that means we are somehow weak.  To be weak means a shark will probably swallow you up and treat you as a little fish.  We have to appear strong in our society so someone doesn't take us on, run us over, or obliterate our life.  We see vulnerability as a bad things when it comes to the media and especially in politics.

The sad part is that when we take vulnerability away, we are essentially numbing our emotions.  The more we numb our emotions, the more we lose site of what it means to be human.  Emotions are a good thing for being human, but unfortunately in our world, we treat this as a disease or something wrong with a person.

Blame Is A Way To Discharge Pain And Discomfort

Blame - A Way To Discharge
Pain And Discomfort

I recently saw a video of a speech given at the TED conference by Brene Brown on vulnerability. (To view the video, click this link) It is an excellent 20 minute video that you should see.  In the video, she talked about how blame plays into vulnerability.  It is easier to blame someone or something or some entity and cause, rather then understand the dynamics of what is going on behind the scenes.

According to Brene Brown, blame is a way to discharge pain and discomfort.  Think about that for a moment.  We live in a society today that is blaming everyone and everybody for everything.  If any issue is written about or discussed in the news, there are usually two sides presented and commented.  It is those that completely agree and those that disagree.  There is no middle ground in the discussion.  It is either one way or another way.  You really don't have to look far to find evidence of this in your day.