Interview With Rebecca - It's Not Your Journey

Interview with Rebecca Lombardo

I had the wonderful opportunity to get a few moments of time with Rebcca Lombardo.  In case you don't know Rebecca, she's a wonderful person who works to help others.  She is an author, advocate and survivor and a Huffington Post Blogger.

Rebecca is the author of "It's Not Your Journey" where she talks about her battle with mental illness and suicide.  Using writing, she wanted to let go of some of the pain she had dealt with in her life.  It never dawned on her that by writing, she would be helping others.

This is what drew my attention to Rebecca because by sharing her pain, she did help others.  I have found the same thing to be true in my own life.   I personally have struggled with suicide in my own life and I try to be there for others when the moments get very dark in life.

Here are a few questions.

1. How did you go about learning to make healthy decisions for your own healing

   After more than 20 years dealing with mental illness, I've become pretty self-aware. I know what works for me and what doesn't most of the time. Other times, my husband can see the tell-tale signs of me spiraling and carefully brings up the topic to me.

2. What is the most important thing you have learned about healing in your own life?

   The most important thing is that I DO want to live. I want to be here and spend as much time as possible with my husband and pets, and that suicide is NOT an option. I'm never going back there again.
   
    

3. How does writing help you to be able to help others?

   I feel like mental illness in all its forms is very lonely and isolating. When people see that there are others out there just like them that are living a decent life, it starts to occur to them that maybe it can happen for them as well.

4. In what ways did your book help you in your healing?

   My book helped me purge all of the anger, resentment, and frustration from my life that I had just been carrying around like a weight on my shoulders. It also helped to validate what I was feeling.

5. What is your most difficult challenge you face in your healing and life?

   It's always hard for me when I hit a bad patch with my depression. I always think to myself that I ought to know how to get out of this, but I don't. Every time you travel the journey, it's for a different reason and in a different direction.

6.  What can we do to improve mental health in our world?

   I think we've definitely opened a dialogue, but we have to keep going. People fear what they do not understand.  We have to make it easier for them to understand. Make it a regular discussion.

7. If someone is suicidal, what can they do?

   If they don't have someone they love to go to and talk it out, there are many resources out there, but going to the emergency room is an important option. They can also text Crisis Text Line at 741 741. I always advise, don't go on social media and talk about it because you may not get the reaction that you were hoping for and that may upset you even more. Find a friend or loved one and have a key word with them. Say, "apple." You just call or text that person and say "apple" and they will know you need help.

8. How do you reach out and connect with someone that is suicidal?

   I am very cautious about offering any specific advice to someone that is suicidal. I'm not a doctor, and I don't want to make things worse, so I try to just be there and be a sounding board and hope to make them feel a bit better. I strongly urge them to seek out someone in there life to talk to.

I appreciate Rebecca sitting down with me for a few minutes and talking with me.  Please check out her book and website.  You can also find Rebecca on Twitter.

Rebecca also is open for speaking engagements in the Michigan area, and you can contact her for more details through her website.

If you are struggling with suicide, I know it isn't easy to reach out, but ask for help.  Find a trusted friend or text the crisis text line in question #7.  Reach out because there are others that know what it is like to go through these moments.  There is help!

For More On Rebecca

• Rebecca's Website:  www.rebeccalombardo.com
• Book: It's Not Your Journey
• Twitter:  @BekaLombardo

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Blog Post And Images (c) 12/19/17 by Don Shetterly

• Permission required in writing before any part of this blog is reprinted, reworded, transmitted or used in any format. 
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Interview On Bullying and Psychological Abuse

Today's post highlights an interview I did with author, Laura Corbeth.  She is the author of the book, My Courage To Tell and I highly recommend this book.  She shares how she got through her own experiences of bullying and psychological abuse.


The interview is posted on my other site, Mind BodyThoughts.com so go check it out.

Hopefully you get a chance to go check out her book on Amazon.  I really enjoyed reading it.

Read The Interview on Bullying with Laura Corbeth

 

Laura's Book Impacted My Life

Review Written by Don Shetterly

There are very few things I read that have such a great impact on me.  This book that Laura Corbeth wrote, My Courage To Tell, is one such book.  I'm stunned with how much it touched me.  I'm stunned at the way a chance connection made this possible.  Soon, I'll be sitting down with Laura to conduct an interview that will be shared on this blog.


Anyone who has followed this blog for very long knows that I too wrote a book about some of the experiences I went through growing up.  It is called, Hope And Possibility Through Trauma.

Part of what I experienced, in addition to the sexual abuse and torture, was psychological abuse like what Laura shares in her book.  I've actually never heard anyone talk about it so eloquently as she did.  She shared her story and through it, her own self-discovery and realization of healing her life.  Laura was so open in what she shared.

The psychological stuff for me included the following... and this is only a minor list.

• My brother tormented me all my life.  He lied a lot, and that’s one of the things that resonated with me from her book.  I used to hate his lying so much.  He would lie about the stupidest things.  We had these tiny little plastic American Building Bricks that I loved to play with.  When he would lie, my dad would get mad at both of us and threaten to throw them in the fireplace.  I finally got to the point where I’d speak up because I was tired of being punished because of his lies.
• He did many horrendous things to me.  Another that resonated from the book was how he would pin me down.  He was overweight and much larger than me.  I was a small-framed kid.  He would get me down on his back and jump up and down with his knees on my upper arms as he stretched them out on the ground.  I still suffer from the physical pain of that.
• I was beaten and hit by my brother and dad.  I’ve had a garden hoe taken to me, a shovel and belts/boards – whatever they could get their hands on, they would use on me.  For a long time in my life, I would find rocks and sticks to hit myself with when life got too rough.  As a kid, my older brother hit me with a round point shovel and caused me to bleed.  He tried to keep me from going inside to get my mom to help me.  He didn't want to get into trouble.
• When Laura talks about the frogs, I’m overwhelmed.  I saw what my brother did to a frog with his bicycle when I was in kindergarten.  I saw my dad kill my pets to help silence me.  I saw my brother and my dad be mean to my pets.  My dad got mad at my dog and shot the dog as it was running down the road.  When my dog finally died of cancer, I was in college, and as it spent the last few days at the vet’s office, the vet and I cried over the phone – when he saw the buckshot still lodged in the feet of my dog.  I’m a fierce protector of animals.  I have a degree in animal science.  No one ever got away with hurting any animal under my watch. 

So many things that Laura shared in her book sounded all too real to me based on my own experiences.  I still struggle and deal with what I went through because it runs deep.  I continue to work through them, and heal my life to the core with every new realization that appears.

I cannot believe I survived and made it this far in life.  I'm beyond ecstatic to see someone like Laura share her story in the way she did.

When I was reading the book, it took me a day and a half to finish it.  I could not put it down.  Laura does an excellent job of weaving the events together into a story that captivates you and holds your attention.

I strongly suggest you check out her book, her website, and the podcast interview she did because it is very enlightening.  See the links below.

We've all got our stories, but if we don't share them, the abuse and horror will continue.  It is up to each one of us to do as Laura did and share your story.  You will touch others, and through touching their lives, they will find more possibility and hope and healing.

Our silence gives a fertile soil for abuse to continue.  Make a difference by speaking up and telling your story.  If you would like a platform to do this, let me know, and I will help you.  I'm always careful that it is not about vengeance, as Laura discusses, but instead that it stands up and says, "I'm taking back my life."

Check Out These Links

• Website:  MyCourageToTell.com
• Podcast:  Podcast with Dr. Berney
• Twitter:   @Laura_Corbeth
• Amazon: My Courage To Tell

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Blog Post And Images (c) 2017 by Don Shetterly

• Permission required before any part of this blog post is reprinted, reworded or used in any form. 
• You are welcomed to share the LINK to this blog post.  

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Mind Body Thoughts and My Creativity

Written by Don Shetterly

If you've been around the blog long enough, you probably know that I'm an author and music artist.  If not, let me take a moment to just introduce myself and what I create.

I am a survivor of child sexual abuse.  At age 26, I suffered from Conversion Disorder and dealt with paralysis, suicide attempts, depression, and anxiety.  I was a workaholic and perfectionist.  I could not let anyone down, even if it meant total destruction of myself.  As much as I thought I knew how to deal with stress, I honestly had no clue!

For years I fooled myself until it caught up with me, and my world came crashing down.  The two books I have written are part of my healing journey through the torture and trauma I experienced.  I am currently finalizing a new book with an expected publishing date of early 2018.

If you found this page through a tweet I posted, it most likely corresponds to one of the books below that is idenitifed by the picture in the tweet.  

Hope And Possibility Through Trauma

Hope And Possibility Through Trauma is my full-length book helping those who have been through so much in life.  If you've experienced childhood sexual abuse or trauma or other horrific moments in your life, this book will speak to you and help give you hope and possibility that you too can heal.  Available on Amazon.

A Journey Through Words

A Journey Through Words is a full-color spiral bound book of poetry and other writings.  It is filled with many poems and thoughts, created as I was struggling to find my way through the difficult moments of healing.  It includes raw thoughts and emotions from where I was at in those moments.  Available on LuLu Press

Relaxing Piano Music

I create relaxing piano music that can be found on iTunes, Spotify, Amazon, CDBaby and many other digital download sites.  It is piano music without any lyrics, from my heart.  Connect with the feeling and emotions of what you hear in the songs I have created. www.DonShetterly.com

From My Heart With Love

These things I have created are part of the way I help support my life and my purpose of working to help others.  I know how difficult it is to deal with pain, and through my creativity, words, and music, I want to be there for others.  I want to help shine the light for them to find footing on their own path.

Many have asked me to allow donations, and if you want, you can always do that at https://www.paypal.me/DShetterly .  However, I would like to ask that you help support me through the creative works I have available.  Click the images and links above for ways you can do this.

I continue to do the things I do out of love in my heart, and I just put these options as a way for others to join this cause.  I know many are hurting and I work hard to be a voice of support and help through the painful moments of healing in life.

Stay tuned, because there is another exciting project coming very soon!

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Blog Post And Images (c) 2017 by Don Shetterly

• Permission required before any part of this blog post is reprinted, reworded or used in any form. 
• You are welcomed to share the LINK to this blog post.  

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my book quote

Yet for so many of us, we go through life feeling as if events and circumstances are in control of who we are.  We are blown by various winds in our day, drenched by the storms, and drawn to pretty colored fake neon signs.  These things take our eyes off our path and draw us away from why we are here.    (Pg 181, Hope And Possibility Through Trauma)

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Blog Post And Images (c) 2017 by Don Shetterly

• Permission required before any part of this blog post is reprinted, reworded or used in any form. 
• You are welcomed to share the LINK to this blog post.  

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I Was Featured In An Interview

The other day I had the opportunity to be interviewed for a site about my book.  I've actually written two books in the course of my life.

A Journey Through Words was more of a poetry book of some of the things that helped me through my own healing. 

Hope and Possibility Through Trauma was the second book.  It was born out of my blog writing.  It was one that I wanted to put together to help people have hope in their own healing.  I wanted others to know there was a possibility that they could heal.

So often in our life, it feels like we won't make it.  It feels like we are all alone.  It feels like no one understands the pain we have gone through.

In addition, it can often feel like there is no hope or possibility in healing the trauma in our lives.  We just feel like we're on a journey all by ourselves.  While this is not true, it is part of the healing journey and a difficult part.

I am working on a new book that will go into more detail about some of the things that were helpful in my own healing.  No, it isn't a recipe book of healing, but one where I'm sharing the struggles I went through and key points that I used to help myself.  Often though, I didn't know I was implementing these healing strategies until long after I did.

This interview that was done gives you further insight into my own life, and why I wrote the books that I have.  It is a good read, and hopefully you'll take a moment to check it out.  I think you'll like it.

For the Interview (click the image below)

Book - A Journey Through Words

Book - Hope And Possibility Through Trauma

Sharing Personal Insights With The World

I'm often taken by surprise at some things in life.  When someone or several people start sharing with me just how my words impact them, my heart feels so alive and warm.  Lately, I've had several unrelated comments sent to me about things I have written and my book.

One reader told me in a review that my book was like I was just writing to them.  This is not the first time I have heard this but it always warms my heart to hear these things.

When I started writing, I just wrote.  At first, no one hardly saw my blog or the words I wrote.  I was getting discouraged when my good friend told me to not give up.  It would take some time.  So, I continued to write and share my heart and my thoughts.

Look for lessons that I can learn...

In all that I write, I try to write about the things that impact me or bring out various emotions.  The things that hit me the hardest are the ones I try to write about on my blog or in my book.  Instead of just writing about the negative, I look for lessons that I can learn and pass on to others.

Sharing the raw thoughts and sometimes the very personal things is not always easy.  It makes a person vulnerable.  There are times that I question myself why I am sharing such an intimate part of my life.  Yet, when I read the wonderful comments I get on how something I wrote has touched someone, I know it was worth me stepping out of my comfort zone.

Make it authentic...

Regardless of what you or I do in life, make it authentic.  Make it real!  Make it who you are and part of your own journey.  If you try to create something for people because you think that is what they want, you will most likely miss so much.  If you write or create that which inspires you, hurts you, and helps you, then most likely others will connect.

We've got plenty of fake people and fake things in this world.  The world needs more authentic people that are willing to create from their heart.  For the ones that create from the heart are the ones that truly help others and the world in ways they most likely don't even fully know.

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Blog Post And Images (c) 2016 by Don Shetterly

• Permission required before any part of this blog post is reprinted, reworded or used in any form. 
• You are welcomed to share the LINK to this blog post.  

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Vulnerability Is Complicated

“I hate uncertainty. I hate not knowing. I can’t stand opening myself to getting hurt or being disappointed. It’s excruciating. Vulnerability is complicated. And it’s excruciating. Do you know what I mean?”

Book:  Daring Greatly by Brene Brown (pg 5)

Book Outline: Why Won't This Itching Stop?

I'm putting this out there as it is a book I am about to start writing. While I don't normally let these things out like this, I realize that no one can write this particular book from my story because the facts are only known to me and a couple other people whom I trust.

Like I said - I'm putting this out there - giving the thought to the universe in hopes that it will be published.



BOOK OUTLINE

Goal:
To keep the book focused on my journey through the itching ordeal I suffered giving what happened along the way, the insights, the struggles and how I came through this. My hope is to bring the actual science in from Dr. Canali in what all transpired and how what happens in the physical body is connected to the trauma and opportunity to become more aware of ourselves. I will draw upon my journal entries, emails and blog postings to help put this book together.


Other:
My goal is to keep the book relatively short but packed with personal experience and science. I know there are many suffering from itching conditions and I want this book to offer some help through what they may be facing or at least give them something to consider and think about. This book will not include my entire story / history but enough to explain the ordeal I went through. The entire story is for the next book.


Introduction:
Setting the scene as to what this book is about and why I am writing it.


Chapter 1:
Before the itching, things were moving along pretty well, and then it started in such a subtle way.


Chapter 2:
As the itching picked up, life grew extremely frustrating and almost to the point I could hardly keep going. Sleep issues, nightmares, night sweats, terror. Everything that I tried to get the itching, rashes to stop and all the store bought stuff that failed. Being afraid to venture outside of my 4 walls, not being able to wear many clothes even though it was cold and winter time,


Chapter 3:
Finally going to get work done on me by Dr. Canali and being so afraid that not even he could help me on this. I was petrified that this was going to take me under. Seeing the changes in the first session of the first day. Seeing the hope and possibility. Working through things and having small unconnected images to what was behind everything until the point it finally came together and created the complete image. The emotions through this, the fear of it.


Chapter 4:
Beginning to recover and growing through the fears – how I did this, what helped me and that it was a process.


Chapter 5:
The science behind the ordeal (narrated or written by Dr. Canali )


Chapter 6:
The story that came out of this ordeal of the abuse that this connected with. (Have to deal with what I can state legally as to who the “perps” are without getting turned down for publishing or setting myself up for a lawsuit. An issue I have to deal through in this.”

*For more articles, check out the Mind Body Thoughts Blog