Silver Gel For Rashes and Itching

Many years ago I went through a condition that I thought would never show up again.  If you suffer from rashes or itching, you'll want to pay close attention to this post.  If you've ever been through a rash like what I have that about drives you crazy with the pain and itching, this product might be for you.  It worked for me! (based upon my own personal experience)

And no - this wasn't a placebo!

Most things out on the market never helped me.  Most over-the-counter products may have given a moment of temporary relief only to rebound and make the problem much worse.  I'm sorry if you're an over-the-counter product company and believe your products work, but they don't!  I've tried them and I'm not going back to try them again.  The last thing you want in a situation like this is something that makes the situation worse.  Yes, I'm sure you have all kinds of studies and marketing to prove your product works, but they don't!  At least they didn't for me. 

Focused In Difficult Moments

Linville Falls, NC
Focused In Difficult Moments

This was a journal entry written around the time of the itchy rash that I recently went through.  While I have moved on from that moment and my hand is fully healed, I thought this was too good to not post up on the blog.  It depicts the difficult moments and the struggle to hang on, stay focused as our body heals.

Tough moment to stay focused.  It's so easy easy to lose site of the excitement of steps ahead.  Maintaining the gratitude and love for what is possible feels harder than expected.

I'm a tough cookie, but sometimes I struggle to find the energy to stay tough or full of courage and strength.  Finding the balance of just allowing life to unfold, but not giving into the forces that desire to see me fail is extremely delicate.


Each day I continue my steps forward.  Each day I fight the forces of fear that wage a war against me.  Some days I feel like I have advanced and other days it seems as if my communication with battlefield command is full of static.  
Regardless, I offer up all of these thoughts, words, and feelings of fear.  I send out love to these areas of my life so they may heal and grow.  I ask that my focus remain steadfast so that the winds of the moment not sway me from my path.  In the end, I will come to know that this too shall pass.

Healing The Itchy Hand Rash, The Story

Healing The Itchy Hand
Rash, The Story

For background on this post, please begin at the blog post on November 6, 2011 (Healing The Itchy Hand Rash, Intro).


From My Personal Journal on October 23, 2011

The Story


Healing - sadness - pain!  These three words sum up this day.  I wish I did not have to experience any of this but I know I did.  It is hard to give up that thought.  It is difficult to let go.


While the pain of the memories is not easy, I am able to go in and feel it, experience it, without being totally overwhelmed.  I could not say that two weeks ago because it almost took me under.


Imagine being held down and raped as a kid.  However, imagine boiling water or hot coffee being poured on you if you tried to resist.  Imagine your little arms and hands being pinned down so you couldn't move as he repeatedly raped you.  Sounds horrible right?  For me, I don't have to imagine any of this.  It is all too real in my mind, the events I describe.

Healing The Itchy Hand Rash, Day 12

Healing The Itchy
Hand Rash, Day 12

For background on this post, please begin at the blog post on November 6, 2011 (Healing The Itchy Hand Rash, Intro).


From My Personal Journal on October 22, 2011

Healing Rapidly


Less than two weeks and so much has transpired in my life.  Going from a fun, exciting and relaxing road trip to a meltdown, a rash and then recovery feels like I am traveling at the speed of light.  Writing about these experiences helps me to put them in perspective.


When I wrote the words down (or should I say when my hand recorded these), I thought it was silly that I could heal myself of the rash.  I laughed at it initially and told no one because I didn't think they would believe me.  Well, I'm glad I followed what the words said even when I didn't believe it myself.


My hand is healing rapidly.  While the words "I Send Out Love" were the premise of the healing, they did not heal my hand.  My connection to them and the concept which was being portrayed is what brought about the healing.  Repeating the words only would have been like I Corinthians 13 that talks about being a clanging symbol.

Healing The Itchy Hand Rash, Day 11

Healing The Itchy
Hand Rash, Day 11

For background on this post, please begin at the blog post on November 6, 2011 (Healing The Itchy Hand Rash, Intro).


From My Personal Journal on October 21, 2011

Today Is Challenging


Can I make this any more clear?   Today is a challenge!  Let me repeat that in case it isn't crystal clear - today is a challenge.  A simple statement and to the point.


It seems like my hand does better and then it goes downhill.  Woke up feeling pretty good with it but now it itches like crazy as I write this.  Overall it is healing, but moments like this really bring out the agitation in me.


My energy level evades me as if it is playing hide and seek.  It is very difficult to focus on any thing positive today.  My body wants to crawl in a cave and hide.  I fight with all my strength to prevent this.  Maybe I should give in and accept it as fate.

Healing The Itchy Hand Rash, Day 10

Healing The Itchy
Hand Rash, Day 10

For background on this post, please begin at the blog post on November 6, 2011 (Healing The Itchy Hand Rash, Intro).


From My Personal Journal on October 20, 2011

Another Night Of Torture


Last night was torture again as I tried to fall asleep.  Instead of muscle tension as in the night before, it was major heartburn and nausea.  I doubt it was anything I ate although that makes no sense.  Once I got to sleep, I slept pretty well the rest of the night.


I can see a marked improvement in the rash today.  The swelling of my hand has lessened, the itch and burning is not as bad.  The redness and blotches or pimples are still there to some degree.  However, seeing an improvement for the first time in over a week is reassuring.  It is difficult to experience this and it takes great amounts of strength and courage to make it through a day.

Healing The Itchy Hand Rash, Day 9

Healing The Itchy Hand
Rash, Day 9

For background on this post, please begin at the blog post on November 6, 2011 (Healing The Itchy Hand Rash, Intro).


From My Personal Journal on October 19, 2011

Difficult Night


Difficult night last night trying to get to sleep.  It is very hard finding a position to sleep in.  On top of that, as I laid down and attempted to sleep, the tension in my neck, shoulders and back turned into intense pain.  It became extremely challenging for me to relax and fall asleep.

At some point in the middle of the night, I saw an extremely bright light and heard some strange noise I had never heard before.  I sat straight up in bed from being startled.

Healing The Itchy Hand Rash, Day 8

Healing The Itchy Hand
Rash, Day 8

For background on this post, please begin at the blog post on November 6, 2011 (Healing The Itchy Hand Rash, Intro).


From My Personal Journal on October 18, 2011

Slight Improvement


I'm seeing slight improvement in my hand but it is no where near 100% or even 75% healed.  The images come up and make me sad.  I struggle to accomplish much in a day because my hand is either swollen and immobile or exhaustion caps my strength.


I'm leery of the images as they haunt me day and night.  Yet, I'm not sure if the images matter anymore.  It seems like another sequel in events I cannot control or change.  Am I avoiding them or am I just at a point in life where I'm no longer spooked.  I feel sadness, despair and hopelessness.  I feel these things intensely.  Yet, I am beginning to doubt that the horror images will make much difference in healing and letting go.

Healing The Itchy Hand Rash, Day 7

Healing The Itchy
Rash, Day 7

For background on this post, please begin at the blog post on November 6, 2011 (Healing The Itchy Hand Rash, Intro).

From My Personal Journal on October 16, 2011

Physically Challenged


A challenge physically to function right now in life.  It is strenuous to just exist and demanding to do much more.  Between the difficulty sleeping, late night headaches, body temperature going from warm to cold, I feel like a test subject.


Is some change today in how my hand looks.  Not that my hand looks good, but at least it is changing.  Oh how I try to remember what this experience was a couple of years ago in order to give myself strength and courage to continue.  I'd rather not sing another "whoa is me" song.

Healing The Itchy Hand Rash, Day 6

Healing The Itchy
Rash, Day 6

For background on this post, please begin at the blog post on November 6, 2011 (Healing The Itchy Hand Rash, Intro).

From My Personal Journal on October 15, 2011

Scared And Frightened


Today is a difficult.  I look at my hand as disfigured and discolored as it appears striking horror in my eyes.  Liquid seeps from the raised blotches on my hand as if my hand has encountered water.  My hand is swollen to what looks like twice my normal size. 


I fear it will always be this way.  It hurts to move it, flex it or use it.  Sleeping becomes a difficult exercise as there is no good way to position my hand.  Every movement brings with it intense pain and itching.


I'm scared and frightened wondering what the outcome of this will be.  It wasn't that long ago that I experienced these horrible moments.  What lies ahead waiting to ambush me as a nightmare?

Healing The Itchy Hand Rash, Day 5

Healing The Itchy
Hand Rash, Day 5

For background on this post, please begin at the blog post on November 6, 2011 (Healing The Itchy Hand Rash, Intro).

From My Personal Journal on October 14, 2011

Temporary Stay Of Relief


I feel like the weight of life isn't as heavy as it was a few days ago.  That's a big relief - a big load off of my shoulders.  However, I am faced with a new challenge.


My hand looks as if it has had boiling water dumped on it.  It appears as if it is bubbling up from somewhere underneat.  My hand appears twice its size.  It itches and burns constantly.  I have been through this before so I'm able to keep the fears at bay.  However I struggle to want to let anyone see me in this way.  

Healing The Itchy Hand Rash, Day 4

Healing The Itchy
Hand Rash, Day 4

For background on this post, please begin at the blog post on November 6, 2011 (Healing The Itchy Hand Rash, Intro).

From My Personal Journal on October 13, 2011

Doubt Things Will Get Better!


So, I'm full of questions and I wonder (maybe doubt) things will get better.  Yet, I know there are those who have it far worse than I do!  Unfortunately that does little for me because I almost feel helpless and hopeless.


I mean now there is a rash on my hand that bothers me daily / hourly.  I feel separated from everyone and anyone.  My life does not operate from joy but from despair.  I want to scream out - just how much more can I endure - can I take?  Isn't this enough?

Healing The Itchy Hand Rash, Day 3

Healing The Itchy
Hand Rash, Day 3

For background on this post, please begin at the blog post on November 6, 2011 (Healing The Itchy Hand Rash, Intro).

From My Personal Journal on October 12, 2011

Anger Consumes My Life


So why is the anger consuming my life?  Why can't I let it go?  I wonder.  I struggle to understand - to comprehend.  People say all you have to do is just let go - release it and accept it.  Yet, that is like asking a drowning man to not get tired and swallow water.


I feel like my anger goes so deep that I cannot begin to see or touch it.  It is as if it is anger from previous lifetimes.  That is my educated guess but not a true fact.


Sometimes I feel the anger acts as a catalyst to keep me going, searching in life and for helping me endure or learn all that I need to.  It feels like a strong connection to life's sustenance for me - or my beloved and hated twin.

Healing The Itchy Hand Rash, Day 2

Healing The Itchy
Hand Rash, Day 2

For background on this post, please begin at the blog post on November 6, 2011 (Healing The Itchy Hand Rash, Intro).

From My Personal Journal on October 11, 2011

Suspended In Flight


I feel as if I opened up the proverbial can of worms yesterday.  It seems as if I'm afraid of being judged childish and selfish.  Yet, I struggle to understand where it is that I am in this moment.


I feel as if I am suspended in flight.  Right now, I am not moving forward, nor am I moving backwards.  In fact, it feels like I am stationary and suspended in flight.


So where do I go?  What do I do?  Do I just sit here waiting for something of substance to come along so that I can latch on to it as a propellant?  

Healing The Itchy Hand Rash, Day 1

Healing The Itchy
Hand Rash, Day 1

For background on this post, please begin at the blog post on November 6, 2011 (Healing The Itchy Hand Rash, Intro).

From My Personal Journal on October 10, 2011

Where Is The Open Door?


I feel as if every door is closed right now.  The more I look for it, the more I feel let down, forsaken and alone.  It is almost as if there is no open door or options ahead.  This thought alone is frightening.

It seems I am once again at a dead end.  I'm so tired of dead ends, not understanding and not finding a way forward.  My body and mind are stressed to the max.  My emotions far out number my energy.

Healing The Itchy Hand Rash, Intro

Healing The Itchy Hand
Rash - Introduction

Over the next several days, I will share my journal entries of a recent rash I dealt with on my hand.  For anyone out there who has suffered through this, a rash is not only difficult to deal with but it is frightening to look at your skin and see the dis-figuration.  Fortunately, I have been through this a couple of years ago, so I knew a little more what to expect.  Keeping myself from freaking out during this time was a challenge of epic proportions.

As of writing this, the rash is healing rather well.  I realize that it was a moment of emotional healing for me and there are parts of the story which I just won't share in a public format at this point.  If anyone doubts that there is a mind body connection, all one has to do is experience moments like what I went through with the rash.  I am fortunate that I can see the cause and effect between what my mind sees and what is portrayed through my body.  However, let me make it clear that in the consciousness of seeing this, the experience of the rash is none the easier.