Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Letting Go Of Painful Moments

It seems like there are so many times in our life where we suffer through loss, disappointment, neglect and hurt at the hands of other people. If you are highly sensitive like I am, these moments can almost be devastating to deal with. I wish I was like others at times that seem to just let these moments wash off their back. Unfortunately, my highly sensitive nature makes it much more difficult.

Recently, I've felt the neglect and hurt in my life as some either seemed to have abused and used me or they just felt that I wasn't worth their time anymore. Talk about a knife being stabbed into the heart, that is what it felt like. It hurts more than I want to let on at times and there are moments where I just want to cry forever.

Through all of this, I've dealt with anxiety, nervousness, tension and depression. I don't let go easily and when the pain comes along, I hurt all the way through every muscle fiber of my body. Yet, somehow, I keep going. I don't know how, but I do. That is most likely a good thing because if I acted upon the despair, it would not be pretty.

The one thing I have learned though, is to just let myself feel the pain, the hurt, and all the other emotions that are coming up. If I try to stop them or alter them in any way, they just find another way to show up. The more I just allow myself to be in the moment, feeling all that is going on in my heart, the more I know I'll come through this. Yes, it gets dicey at times to feel this, but somehow, I seem to find the strength to go on.

While forgiveness is not an easy concept for me, I do find that the more I focus on forgiving the person(s) for what they did to me, the more I can let go. Yet, to let go, I have to feel all the emotions and that is the difficult part. I wish it was easier but then if I felt nothing in all of this, would I be human?

I can't help but think of Oriah Mountain Dreamer's poem, "The Invitation" which means so much to me. The following part of her poem is the one that speaks the loudest right now during this time. I'll leave you with this quote from her book.

From Page 2, The Invitation (by Oriah Mountain Dreamer)
It doesn't interest me to know where you live or how much money you have. I want to know if you can get up, after the night of grief and despair, weary and bruised to the bone, and do what needs to be done to feed the children.

Further Reading:
1) Holding On And Not Letting Go
2) Get Over It

Blog Post & Images (c) 4/24/11 Don Shetterly - use by permission only

1 comment:

  1. this is really helpful,thanks for sharing your thoughts, i am having to let go of something really big and it is exquisitely painful, endeavouring to stay present and let it be, self-honouring