For some reason, it seems like my bad and scary nightmare dreams tend to happen in the 4 am hour. Last night was no exception. Yet, when I was awakened the first time by the doorbell, I felt so frightened, scared and as if something was in the house watching me. It isn't the first time I have felt that way and these frightening dream states tend to be less frequent then they once were. However, it seems like I cannot escape them.
It was around midnight in my dream when the event happened although the actual time was around 4 am. Since it was night time, most of the houses around us were dark, except for ours. We had the usual lights on and in this dream, instead of having a solid front door, we had a full length glass door. When the doorbell rang, I went to the door and had nothing on but a t-shirt and boxers. I would never answer the door dressed like this, but in my dream I did.
The people at the door were numerous. I know there were at least a half dozen if not more. It was hard to tell just how many were there. They were all murmuring something that was hard to make out, but something to the effect that they wanted and needed something from me. It was like they wouldn't listen to reason or stop asking. They just continued the murmuring sounds over and over. I kept telling them that I had nothing to give them, but they would not go away. They just stood there.
I asked them why they were bothering us this late at night and they told me that our house was the only one with a light on. I responded to them that it was late and too late for them to be out, but they said they had no other choice. They needed something from me and they could not wait. I was still not sure what they needed from me.
Finally my partner told me to just tell them to come back another time as it was too late and there was nothing more we could do tonight. I turned out the lights, but felt like they never left. It was like these people were very familiar to me, but yet they were strangers. It was like they were my family, but I didn't recognize them.
Frightened and scared, it was difficult to close my eyes. It is the type of fear that makes you run to the bathroom. However, I noticed in the bathroom both of my kittens were in my closet and so I went in and stayed with them for a moment. I was actually thinking about just hiding in there with them for the rest of the night because I was too afraid to go back to the bedroom.
Once I got back in bed, it was still hard to shut my eyes. I tried to pull the covers up over my face enough to hide myself, but I could not get the thought out of my mind that someone or something was watching me. It felt very frightening and very scary like some horror scene in a movie.
Finally I fell back to sleep only to be woken up about an hour later by the sound of the doorbell. Of course, no one else in the house heard the doorbell but me and I didn't get up to go check it out. There was no way I was getting out of the safety of my bed to go to the door. I didn't care who was there.
I get tired of these nightmare dreams that scare me to death. Throughout my life I have dealt with them and for a period of time, I quit allowing myself to dream. After all, it is exhausting when I go through nights such as this and it makes the next day or two difficult to endure. Nothing in this most recent dream makes sense and I wish it did. Sometimes I know we just dream to dream, but sometimes it feels like there is a connection to something within us that is so hard to explain.
From another blog post that I wrote on Phantom Doorbell Ringing, (click here to read this post), you can see that this isn't the first time. It is the first time I can remember two distinct moments of the phantom doorbell ringing in the night. What it means or if it means anything, I have absolutely no way to know at this time. I'm just recording it on this blog so that hopefully one day I'll be able to look back and see something other than frustration with these nightmare dreams.
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