This particular card was titled, "focus". It went on to say that you need to think about what you want, not what you don't want. Guard your thoughts carefully because they create your experiences.
It is all too easy to focus on what I don't want in my day. Those thoughts seem to come easy because I think in many ways, I don't always see myself as worthy to have things I do want. While I don't want to readily admit this in public, I still live in that moment of life where all was taken away from me. From that point forward, I had no control it seemed from what people larger than I in life would dictate for my existence. To this very day, I still operate as someone running from the tigers of life while desiring the complete opposite.
It is much more difficult to focus on what I want and it is something I have set out to do for my life. I won't say I have not made progress, but I am not where I need to be. It does involve me letting myself travel deep into this journey and touch the root of all the sorrow which fuels the growth of despair. It would be far less painful if I just hid all of this from view, but then I know I have sentenced these things to being nothing more than a hidden poison eating away from the inside out.
Asking myself to focus on what I want is not easy because I truly do not connect with what I want. It is like something foreign to me. It is like asking me to communicate in a language I do not know. I realize that this is part of the process and so for today, I hold the question of asking myself what I do want for my life. I allow my mind and body to rewire portions of the brain in seeking these answers, rather than succumbing to the already wired neural pathways I've forged in my brain.
We need not have all the answers in life, but what we focus on is where we will head. It is a journey of travel deep into the hidden corners of our life to give us the opportunity to discover that which we do not know. By focusing on what we want, we have already given ourselves possibility and hope. It is my hope that everyone reading this will remember these things as much as it is a message to myself.
The Healing With The Angels iPhone app is available on iTunes and may be available through other places that I am not aware of.
You may also want to read more about this iPhone app on my blog.
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Blog Post And Images (c) 7/19/12 by Don Shetterly
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