Dear Pets, I'm Sorry I Failed

I saw that my older brother's dog died and while seeing a pet die makes me sad, I find myself remembering just how much he would torture animals. I still remember when I was in Kindergarten and seeing him grind that frog with his bicycle tire into oblivion.  I wanted to cry but I knew if I did, I would be next.  I had to cry in silence.

Most of my pets tried to stay clear of him and my dad for good reason. They were safer that way. Its just hard for me to picture my brother having a pet and being sad that it died.

Has he changed... Can a zebra get rid of their stripes?

In my family, an animal was no different than a child. They existed for the sole purpose of control and manipulation through whatever means existed. In the case of an animal though, torturing them to extinction was not something that the authorities would ever be alerted to.  I'm not sure the authorities would have listened anyway in those days.

Yes, they were loved at times, but it was a love based upon convenience by the monsters.  I always begged my animals to hide from the monsters and sometimes they would listen, but at other times they would emerge looking for food.

It wasn't just my older brother that did this.  My dad was part of this blood sport as well.

To all those that didn't make it - I'm so sorry.

1. To the numerous kittens that your only crime was you were born and had to be sentenced to death by drowning in a gunny sack in the river or crushed in the cellar door.  I'm so sorry I couldn't rescue you.  I wasn't even allowed to cry as the monster tried to explain it was an accident.
2. To my Bunny Rabbit that I won memorizing many bible verses all week long in vacation bible school who mysteriously died that first night home after I went to sleep.  I'm so sorry, I should have never let you out of my site.
3. To one of my sheep that loved letting me know who was boss around the female sheep, I'm sorry I was in college and couldn't stop him from taking a 2x4 to your head because he got mad at you.
4. To all the pigs and cows and other animals that he transported where he would get a thrill out of jamming the hotshot up their butt to make them move.  I'm sorry I didn't take that thing to him and run it until the batteries ran dead.
5. To my favorite dog, Princess who was always just trying to get our attention and made him so mad that at times that he would hit her with whatever he could lay his hand on.  Her yelps still haunt me, but the thing that haunts me most is knowing that she still had the buckshot in her legs from the time he shot her.  Both the vet and I cried the day Princess died, but I'm so sorry I didn't take the gun and put buckshot in him.
6. To the cats that my family would get upset with if we were ever allowed to have them inside for a brief few moments. I'm sorry that my family thought it was appropriate to open the door and toss you up in the air as they flung you outside. 
7. To the little dog that my younger brother loved so much, the only crime Duchess committed was that my father considered it to be a mutt.  He hated the dog.  It wasn't until years later that my brother told me he was forced to shoot his pet and bury it when he was only in high school.  Words cannot describe my shock and horror when I heard this. 
8. To the squirrels that would be shot in the woods because my father thought it was a fun sport, I would try to wander in the woods acting as if everything was fine.  I loved the sounds of the woods. Deep inside, I was so lost in the horror of a sport that killed an innocent animal.  

To all the other animals...  I'm so sorry.  I can't remember all of  you.  I know I always kept wanting more animals but I'm sorry I brought you home into this mess.  You would have been safer if I would have never loved you in the first place.  I wasn't strong enough to protect myself and I didn't stand a chance against the monsters that did these things.  You gave up your life for me and saved me from many more beatings than I got.  I will never forget that as long as I live.

I always dreamed of a world where the animals would rise up against the humans and take them down.  It never happened of course, but I still dream about it to this day. 

I did try to make up for it when I was managing some farms.  One owner started to kick an animal that was down and with fire in my eyes, I looked at him and said, "if you kick that animal one more time, you will never walk again."  Oh no, no longer did I allow anyone to abuse animals in front of me.

It makes me angry when I see people not respecting nature the way these creatures are intended to live.  Its fine to observe them, but most of the time mother nature knows best and it isn't up to us to interfere with their daily lives.  These animals know far better what they need then any human ever will.  Most of all though, don't you dare abuse an animal with my knowledge of it.  Most likely the authorities will not be needed.  I'm a peaceful person until you mess with animals.

It isn't cute to me when I see humans parade their kill around town as if it is an honor.  This isn't respect for the life of those that can't defend themselves.  I don't wish to see it.  I find it horrible and unforgiving.

They say that most people who abuse and mistreat animals or pets have had abusive experiences in life or have unresolved anger issues.  Regardless of what you have been through, there is no excuse for this type of behavior.  If you have issues, work on them.  Don't take them out on innocent loving animals!

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Blog Post And Images (c) 7/8/14 by Don Shetterly

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