Showing posts with label gay marriage. Show all posts
Showing posts with label gay marriage. Show all posts

Friday, August 12, 2016

After 16 Years

I never thought this day would come.  After 16 years, we're finally married.  For much of that 16 years, we never had the option to legally get married.  It was not until the Supreme Court decision for marriage equality on June 26, 2015 that made this possible.

I cannot begin to describe what it means to be able to finally be married,  Yes, we waited some time from the moment we could get married until we actually did it.  I proposed on December 25, 2014, but it all came home after the Pulse Orlando shooting.  We did not want to be in a situation where something would happen to one of us and legally we could not be there for the other.  In that light, it became imperative to do this sooner than later.

We had begun to plan a beautiful beach wedding with close friends and family, but life got in the way and so those plans had to get abandoned.

To keep things simple and because we wanted to get this done, we went down to the Orlando Courthouse and exchanged our vows.  In fact, we were only a couple of miles from the Pulse nightclub and it felt good to celebrate that which the shooter tried to destroy.

Having immediate family there made all the difference.  I was nervous.  In fact, I think we both were pretty nervous.  I don't quite remember the vows because my mind was in a daze.  I tried to hold back the tears, but the emotions were deep.  After all, after 16 years, we finally were getting to make our love for one another permanent.

It all seemed like a blur.  Before the wedding, we wondered if this ceremony would really have much of an impact.  Would it change things?  I mean being together for 16 years, we really do know each other.  In the marriage counseling online course we took, the discussion helped us to learn more about ourselves.

I can honestly say though, that after the wedding ceremony, it definitely changed things.  It felt more permanent.  It felt like we were finally standing up in front of family and friends and saying - hey - we love each other and we mean the world to each other.  It was a precious moment that I will never forget.

As we enjoyed the rest of the day, I found myself realizing that I no longer had to be jealous of those that could get married.  We were now one of them.  We were no longer second class citizens - we had the same rights.  I'm not a political person, but I sure was tired of being used as something cheap in the realm of politics and religion.

We no longer have to worry about the future or anything else, because we know that our relationship is now recognized and we are one with each other.  It feels strange that after 16 years, we've only just begun.  The years have gone by quickly.

My eyes are star filled and glazed, but my love has grown deeper for the man I love.  I'm not going to hide it anymore.  If someone does not have the capacity to accept me and us for the way we are, then I realize it is not a problem I can worry about any longer.

On July 26, 2016 we pledged our love for one another and I'm the happiest guy in the world right now.  I love my husband with all my heart and we both respect each other with the highest respect you can give to another human.  We see each other for what we are, not what we think they should be.  We accept each other as they are and together we've grown so much over the past 16 years.

It wasn't that long ago in life before I met him that I wondered if true love was possible.  I wondered if it could last, when I met someone.  When we met, I wasn't looking for a relationship and when we met, I wasn't even ready to accept I was gay.  My heart knew immediately though from that moment we first said hello.

http://mindbodythoughts.blogspot.com/2014/12/proud-to-annnounce-im-engaged.html

Even with the past and all the difficulties we have both faced in life, we are there for each other.  Out of the love we share, we are growing and making it in life.  We face the day with new hope and possibility and we enjoy the warm embrace of love that our two hearts share.

I wear my new wedding ring with pride.  I cherish it and the symbol that it portrays.   It means so much to me to wear this ring.  My heart sings with joy.  My heart rejoices in the joy and love that I have found in a person I love so very much.

LGBTq people have come a long ways and what was once barely talked about is more accepted in society.  Being gay is not a choice.  If it was, I think many of us would have not wished to go through some of the horror we have.  Being gay is who we are.  It is how we are made.  Instead of hating those who are gay, let us love one another without conditions and strings attached.  Let us love one another as humans should.






Blog Post And Images (c) 2016 by Don Shetterly
  • Permission required before any part of this blog post is reprinted, reworded or used in any form. 
  • You are welcomed to share the LINK to this blog post.  


Saturday, July 9, 2016

Intolerance Is Not Love

I posted something yesterday on my twitter feed and within a short time, I lost well over 50 followers.  I lost count at some point because they were coming in so fast, I could not keep up.  It amazes me just how intolerant people are.

I realize gay marriage can be a volatile topic, but I try to be very respectful, warm, and compassionate in all that I write and share.  I don't try to force you to believe in what I do, but I don't shy away from putting out there in the world, that which impacts my life.  I try to stay open to all things, all thoughts, views, beliefs and actions.  Sometimes I may fall flat on my face doing this, but I try hard.

Many of the profiles that unfollowed were of "enlightened people" or at least that is what they claimed.  Some of the profiles claimed love and tolerance and being open.  Some gave the impression that they were the best people in the world.  It surprised me reading some of the profiles because either those are just words they wrote, or they don't understand what they wrote in the profile.

I step outside my comfort zone...

You will not see me back away from issues because they are too tough to deal with in our world.  I know that the only way I can learn and grow is if I step outside of my comfort zone.  Now, don't get me wrong in what I'm saying here.  There are plenty of things that I see which absolutely don't resonate with me and even if I step outside of my comfort zone, I don't bathe in them.

Welcoming thoughts and ideas and beliefs you don't agree with helps us understand one another and it helps us to grow.  It does not mean we have to agree or disagree with these things.  It does not mean we have to embrace them.  We can expose ourselves to them and then see how they apply to our own life.  It means that we can evaluate them and then decide what we want to do with these thoughts, ideas, beliefs, and opinions.  It can help us understand another individual from a new perspective.

It is not love...

To categorically reject something you see posted is shortsighted in my mind.  It is not what makes a thinker great.  It is not what makes a person truly human in my view.  It is not love.  It is intolerance.

I was saddened yesterday when this happened and I was grateful that a few encouraged me publicly and privately.  I try to be a very caring and respectful person, so when that many reject one little tweet I made, it really hurts.  I'm sensitive and I don't deal with rejection very well.  It was the absence of love and tolerance.

I want to challenge us to be more than we are.  I want to challenge us to include more people than we do.  I want to challenge us to listen more than we do and allow some other thought, idea, belief or opinion to look us straight in the eye.

http://mindbodythoughts.blogspot.com/2016/06/we-can-do-better-with-social-media.html


As a civilization, I think we can be more than we are.  I think instead of intolerance being the new norm in life, we can rise to meet the possibilities of the future.  We can rise up with love.  If we walk hand in hand, we will be stronger, than if we cut the hands off of our fellow humans.

To those that unfollowed, I'm sorry that you decided to do this.  I hope you will reconsider and challenge yourself to greater heights.  I hope you will help me understand things that I don't understand or know at this moment.





Blog Post And Images (c) 2016 by Don Shetterly
  • Permission required before any part of this blog post is reprinted, reworded or used in any form. 
  • You are welcomed to share the LINK to this blog post.  


Sunday, October 11, 2015

Can Clerks Refuse

By the time this YouTube video by Matt Baume is posted, so much could have changed with this story that is playing out currently in the news.  Regardless, I think this video makes a good point in a very respectful manner and so I am going to post it.  This is an important subject and while your beliefs may disagree, there is an important part of our freedom at stake here where all men are created equal, not just those we agree with.  If you wish to comment, please keep the comments respectful.

YouTube Video:  Can Clerks Refuse To Marry Couples 



Copyright




Blog Post And Images (c) 1/01/07 by Don Shetterly
  • Permission required in writing before any part of this blog is reprinted, reworded, transmitted or used in any format.
  • Feel free to share the blog post LINK and a brief summary.
  • https://mindbodythoughts.blogspot.com

  • “Amazon, the Amazon logo, MYHABIT, and the MYHABIT logo are trademarks of Amazon.com, Inc. or its affiliates.”