Diaries and Memories Both Good And Bad

(Written by Jeff Lemlich)

I did a very smart thing, back when I was 11 years old.   I also did something kind of stupid.   I started keeping a diary.

That was smart, because thousands of memories from my past are now at my fingertips.

That was stupid, for the same reason.

Just the other day I couldn’t remember the name of one of my teachers, and reached for my 1975 journal, hoping her name was on one of the pages.   Thankfully, it was, putting an end to something that was starting to drive me bonkers.  That’s when having my life story written in ancient Flair pens really made me happy… but at the same time, I glanced at some of the other things I had written in that journal.

Ugh – was that really me?   How could I have had so many prejudices?   Did I really think I was smarter than everyone else?  How could I have had so little empathy?

I struggle to forgive the child that I used to be, and those journal entries make me cringe even more.   Yet I realize where those prejudices and the lack of empathy stemmed from.    Years of being put down and bullied made me think my being “different” made me a freak, so it was natural that I’d try to see others as the freaks.  Sometimes I put my pain into words, and other times I just buried it deep, deep, deep down inside.  It’s the sort of thing that I’d love to forget, but again, there it is on paper… reminding me of the crap that I went through, and the crap that it put into my head.

That isn’t the only drawback to journaling.   If I’m angry at someone or something, I should put it in my journal, right?  Well, what will happen 10, 15, 20 years later, if someone I know comes across it and reads it?   Wouldn’t that just reopen old wounds that have healed eons ago?    Is it better to cross out the bad parts and just try to remember the good, or would doing so further skew the truth and present a warped and maybe even dangerous view of how things were?

Despite all this, I am grateful to have noted so many places, people, and events.   I have a linear memory, and can tell you the date when almost anything in my life happened.   The more I read my journals, the more I remember… but are things really supposed to be that way?   Aren’t we supposed to live and learn, and forgive and forget?

 
I don’t have the answer.  I just know that my old journals – despite the bad memories – are precious to me.   I hate forgetting things, even the things that would best be obliterated from my mind.    It beats racking my brain trying to remember things, such as the name of that long-forgotten teacher from my past.  

Memories are very important to me, and I love helping others remember names, dates, and songs (especially songs).   I can write a lot more about that if you liked this guest blog post.    Leave a comment if you’d like to read more, and if the response is good, I just might make it happen.

- Jeff (SavageLost.com)

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Jeff Lemlich

Author
Guest Blogger
Avid Vinyl Record Collector
Male Survivor of Child Abuse

Visit Jeff's website at

SavageLost.com

  

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Blog Post And Images (c) 2017 by Don Shetterly

• Permission required before any part of this blog post is reprinted, reworded or used in any form. 
• You are welcomed to share the LINK to this blog post.  

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Meditative Journaling

Here's a simple exercise for journaling along with your meditation time. If you feel you can not journal, this might be a good way to try something different. Sometimes recording what we feel and experience helps us connect with what we are seeking or trying to understand or just needing to connect with. This is a very simple exercise and you can adapt it to your meditation time or a moment of silent in your day. Let it work for you and be something that fits into your life.

Find a quiet place where you can be alone. Outside in nature is nice but even in a quiet room where you won't be disturbed is good. When you find that place, spend a couple of moments just centering yourself on your breath and feeling your body support and balance you as you sit there.

When you're ready, grab a piece of paper (on a clipboard or in a notebook can work great). Then begin to list every single word that comes to your mind, one right after another. No matter how silly or unimportant the word may seem, make a list of these words. How many you record is up to you.

Next, after you have listed the words - try writing a short sentence that comes to mind about the word. Why did it come into your mind? What were you thinking about? What prompted you to write it down. Let that sentence flow as you give life and meaning to the word.

When you are done writing your sentences, take a moment to read back through them and then just sit with what you have written. More than likely, you're going to see a pattern emerge and all of these words together will tell a story of what you need to hear in that moment. It is like an opening in to finding that which you want to connect to. Of course, you may realize that all the time, these things were just part of you. This was but a simple exercise to help you connect with them.

And now if you are one of the people who say writing is difficult and you struggle to journal or sit in meditation - well guess what - you've just done all those things!

*For more articles, check out the Mind Body Thoughts Blog

Labyrinth Experience

I know that my friend Trish loves the Labyrinth Experiences that she has done but to be honest, I wasn't fully sure what they were. So I asked her to write about what they are. The following article was written by Trish Kalhagen and you can learn more about the work she does through the link at the end of the article.

What Is A Labyrinth?

They are usually a rounded path that can be created in different patterns. There is one way in and one way out, unlike a maze. They can be walked outside and inside. There is mystery that surrounds this experience. Each person brings their own individual, personal story with them that is unlike any other as they walk this journey. It is a way to feel the present moment, feel your breath and each footstep. It is an invitation to slow down our fast paced lives and just breathe, just walk, one moment at a time. Some people speak silently from the heart what they are trying to figure out ~~ what is my main question at this time that I would like an answer to? Some people speak a mantra, a repeated phrase as they walk. Others speak just one word that has meaning for them as they move along this path.

The labyrinth has three stages ~~ Releasing: From the first step to the middle is an invitation to let go of worries and concerns. The second stage is Receiving: This is within the center of the labyrinth where there could be an answer, some clarity, creative idea, maybe some focus, or just a wonderful sense of peace. The third stage is Integrating: As you walk back out the way you have come, you may feel grounded and begin to embrace any ideas or answers you have received.

Giving your labyrinth experience a voice with someone is important if you are able to do this. Journaling about it may be extremely helpful as well.

Each person is moving toward the same destination in the center. All will have different and individual labyrinth journey experiences. Opening your heart is the key.

Trish Kalhagen
Reiki Practitioner/Spiritual Director
Sacred Moments
Edgerton, WI 53534




*For more articles, check out the Mind Body Thoughts Blog